Finally breaking that comment virginity omg lmao XD orz and what better way to then with one of the funniest comics I've read in a long time! <3 I've been lurking way too long so ;w;
Dr.Salt - this comic was absolute gold! I was laughing every page even though I did feel like it ended a little too abruptly for me? Especially after reading your first round comic, this one just felt a little more lacking with its brevity. Also, where do I get my own TL bot? ;w; <3
Evi - yoooooooooo! This comic just speaks to me hahah. The jibs between Caps and Shift and the overall vibe of this comic... after how many years of you having these two and then finally putting them out like this, I feel like you've really stepped up your game and tried to impress (which is working hehe). I also disagree with Dino on the swearing thing - I don't feel like Caps swearing is forced and if anything, it would be even *more* out of character for him to have censored swears?
I also don't agree with Pyras comment on needing to see more of Shift? I think it's the fact that he has many sides to him that keep him an interesting character. I get that his character as a whole is meant to be cutely sinister (especially with that little shit face he keeps pulling) and it provides a good contrast to Caps, who is much like an open book and easy to read, and it's the give and take between them in their conversations that makes their dynamic even more interesting? Though I guess it might just me and the way I interpreted it, hehe~ <3
Anyway :3 good job the both of you and I wish you both luck! <3
King of VOID 2015: Round 2 / TL Bot vs. Capslock & Shift
Critiques & Comments
# 13
Posted:
Apr 12 2015, 06:57 AM
# 12
Posted:
Apr 12 2015, 06:11 AM
I feel like both of these are weaker submissions from last round,
Dr.Salt, I've always loved your work with TLBot since Goodnight Pugwash and the TTT but I feel like this might be your weakest story with him thus far; most of the gags in the middle were great but it ends kinda abruptly and idunno, just didn't vibe with me in the end
Evi I'm enjoying seeing the interactions between Capslock and Shift, but after both these comics I feel like I need to see more sides of Shift to keep interested in him, cause it's getting to the point I'm relating alot with Capslock's frustration but I'm not sure if that's a good thing XD
Overall though these are still fine comics, good job keeping us entertained~
Dr.Salt, I've always loved your work with TLBot since Goodnight Pugwash and the TTT but I feel like this might be your weakest story with him thus far; most of the gags in the middle were great but it ends kinda abruptly and idunno, just didn't vibe with me in the end
Evi I'm enjoying seeing the interactions between Capslock and Shift, but after both these comics I feel like I need to see more sides of Shift to keep interested in him, cause it's getting to the point I'm relating alot with Capslock's frustration but I'm not sure if that's a good thing XD
Overall though these are still fine comics, good job keeping us entertained~
# 11
Posted:
Apr 10 2015, 01:26 PM
These were as hilarious as i was hoping they would be I'm so happy lol
# 10
Posted:
Apr 8 2015, 06:56 PM
Dr SALT OH MY GOD I absolutely love your humor. You had me laughing right from the first page. I super enjoyed your take on Caps and Shift and the whole dynamic of caps being a lot more natural than shift was very spot on. poor shift at the end BUT I CAN TOTALLY SEE THAT HAPPENING LMAO. Seriously, I love it. I'm gonna read this comic again now.
Rob: I getcha! in this case it was just time restraints and I was forced to smoosh all the establishing stuff on one page. I don't usually place literally half of my script onto a single page and I totally saw it looking cluttered. I tired making it flow as well as possible, but yeah;;
Dino: Sorry man! I understand the points you've made about swearing but it would go absolutely against CAPSLOCK as a character if I had to tone him down. He's not supposed to be witty and clean; he's brash and aggressive when he wants to be and there's especially no filter when he's mad.
In this case, he's extremely angry and frustrated towards Shift for "being a little shit" (that one "heck" he used? it was to Tl bot) so he's naturally gonna swear more than usual, that's just how it is :0
Rob: I getcha! in this case it was just time restraints and I was forced to smoosh all the establishing stuff on one page. I don't usually place literally half of my script onto a single page and I totally saw it looking cluttered. I tired making it flow as well as possible, but yeah;;
Dino: Sorry man! I understand the points you've made about swearing but it would go absolutely against CAPSLOCK as a character if I had to tone him down. He's not supposed to be witty and clean; he's brash and aggressive when he wants to be and there's especially no filter when he's mad.
In this case, he's extremely angry and frustrated towards Shift for "being a little shit" (that one "heck" he used? it was to Tl bot) so he's naturally gonna swear more than usual, that's just how it is :0
# 9
Posted:
Apr 8 2015, 03:26 PM
Salt - the only one I really found funny was the last page. The rest of it was just sort of meh for me. I could be totally off base here, but it seems like you're allowing the art side of your comic slip and just be carried by the writing? Some of it looks copy pasted, could use some more backgrounds, and perspective variance - it works for some of the gags, but some of them not so much.
Evi - At first the story sort of bored me. That first page has a lot of text. But about halfway through it got interesting and by the end I was like, Yes, what happens. I want to read the next thing, find out about their assignment and stuff. It's nice.
I disagree with Dino on the swearing thing. I didn't notice it so much on my first run through (but that might be because I skipped some text? idk). But on my second run through, I noticed that Capslock swore a lot, but Shift didn't swear at all, so it could just be a character thing, or Capslock could just be really fucking-hell-shit mad.
Evi - At first the story sort of bored me. That first page has a lot of text. But about halfway through it got interesting and by the end I was like, Yes, what happens. I want to read the next thing, find out about their assignment and stuff. It's nice.
I disagree with Dino on the swearing thing. I didn't notice it so much on my first run through (but that might be because I skipped some text? idk). But on my second run through, I noticed that Capslock swore a lot, but Shift didn't swear at all, so it could just be a character thing, or Capslock could just be really fucking-hell-shit mad.
# 8
Posted:
Apr 8 2015, 01:11 PM
Salt- I'll echo Mint's senta...mints? by saying that the humor in this was pitch perfect. I laughed out loud at least twice on every page. The concept was brilliant, and every beat just clicked. The nose glasses disguise reveal was my favorite part, though. And the ending. And the rest of it.
Evi- I love your artwork, panel layouts, and the minimal color palette you used. I also quite enjoyed the stuff that was going on here, but one thing pulled me out of it a little bit (and I know I'm probably gonna get some boos for this), but the swearing.
Your 'fuck's and 'shit's come off as abrasive and unnecessary out of your characters' mouths. Your artwork looks like a Nickelodeon cartoon, so if you replaced every 'fuck' with 'heck' (as you inexplicably do in one panel), and every 'shit' with 'shoot', 'dang', or 'darn', you'd have a much more appealing comic here.
I get it, they're supposed to talk like real people. That's great. But when you're afforded the luxury of writing out your dialogue, you can come up with something a little more eloquent than many real people can muster in conversation.
I'm not against cussing. I do it all the time. But with the proliferation of online publishing, where you can literally do anything you want, without worrying about some editor saying "you know, we're going for such and such demographic, we can't print this kind of language blahblahblah", I think people have a tendency to just cuss, cuss, cuss, and it gets really tiresome. By throwing profanity around willy-nilly, it becomes trite.
It's fairly easy to make people laugh at dirty jokes and crude language. Being hilarious AND completely clean? That takes some skill.
But that's just my 2 cents, some food for thought. I'm not here to tell anyone how to write their characters, or what they can and can't say or do. And despite rolling my eyes at the beginning, I got into it halfway through page 1.
You guys both delivered the goods here, can't wait to see the results!
Evi- I love your artwork, panel layouts, and the minimal color palette you used. I also quite enjoyed the stuff that was going on here, but one thing pulled me out of it a little bit (and I know I'm probably gonna get some boos for this), but the swearing.
Your 'fuck's and 'shit's come off as abrasive and unnecessary out of your characters' mouths. Your artwork looks like a Nickelodeon cartoon, so if you replaced every 'fuck' with 'heck' (as you inexplicably do in one panel), and every 'shit' with 'shoot', 'dang', or 'darn', you'd have a much more appealing comic here.
I get it, they're supposed to talk like real people. That's great. But when you're afforded the luxury of writing out your dialogue, you can come up with something a little more eloquent than many real people can muster in conversation.
I'm not against cussing. I do it all the time. But with the proliferation of online publishing, where you can literally do anything you want, without worrying about some editor saying "you know, we're going for such and such demographic, we can't print this kind of language blahblahblah", I think people have a tendency to just cuss, cuss, cuss, and it gets really tiresome. By throwing profanity around willy-nilly, it becomes trite.
It's fairly easy to make people laugh at dirty jokes and crude language. Being hilarious AND completely clean? That takes some skill.
But that's just my 2 cents, some food for thought. I'm not here to tell anyone how to write their characters, or what they can and can't say or do. And despite rolling my eyes at the beginning, I got into it halfway through page 1.
You guys both delivered the goods here, can't wait to see the results!
# 7
Posted:
Apr 8 2015, 06:50 AM
Salt- I could not stop laughing at literally everything. The jokes were spot on, non-stop, and totally priceless. That being said I think more could have been done art-wise to bring it up a notch, like some additional line widths - I actually thought those shelves on page 2 were some weird flooring until I saw it was connecting around Ronin.
Evi - You already have my feedback on this from last night! Thanks for making the long haul with me!
Evi - You already have my feedback on this from last night! Thanks for making the long haul with me!
# 6
Posted:
Apr 7 2015, 04:26 PM
uploaded! ran out of time for fancy colours but it'll do. i need sleep.
# 5
Posted:
Mar 26 2015, 09:51 PM
Battle Bots!
# 4
Posted:
Mar 24 2015, 01:52 PM
Hot Bot on Bot action!
# 3
Posted:
Mar 24 2015, 01:40 PM
YES!!! ROBO SHOWDOWN!! I'm so happy XD
# 2
Posted:
Mar 24 2015, 01:09 PM
This will be a battle for the ages
# 1
Posted:
Mar 24 2015, 12:35 PM
MY DREAMS ARE COMING TRUUUUUUUUUUUUUE
Tournament Match
Drawing Time:
2 weeks
Ended:
Apr 14th, 2015
Votes Cast:
21
Page Views:
2835
Winner:
Evi
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Artist
EVI- Oooh a continuous story for this tournament? You got bawls. BRASS BALLS GOOD SIR. And considering all these robots, I expect nothing less! Seriously, great pages. Sharp clean lines, and nice bleed from your last round to this one. Great to see Kars being the butt of an explosive joke. Your cityscapes and environments were simply divine. I don't know if you're working with references, but they really look natural! Your minimal colors were no doubt due to time constraints, but I certainly hope you keep it. Really gives your comic a nice yellowed old style. This definitely was a bit more serious than the lighthearted of the last round, so I miss more of your gags, but this was still enjoyable nonetheless.
Best of luck y'all!