Thanks for the feedback guys! I need to keep going so I can work on these ideas! Also, @gregly I think that might actually be the part of the comic I'm proudest of lol. That, and the punch clouds. I'm glad you enjoyed that little detail.

Bobo! your layouts are sweet! not just boring squares but but exciting shapes the push the story forward!

Golden! Love your style! so loose and dynamic.  plenty of laughs in your writing as well!

Nice job guys!

Bobo: I like a lot of the panel layouts.  There's a good sense of flow there and creative arrangements that aid the mood whether its action or sex.  The comic could indeed have used more shading and the anatomy gets stiff.  So good to be aware of those.  The humor does fall a little flat.  You really got to sell the punchline.  Like when she says Bye Bitch and shes crying a tear you could exaggerate her expression and body language to make it seem more dramatic or something.  Humor can be hard to pull off though just keep in mind that its not just conveyed through dialogue.

Golden: I like the cute style here.  I really enjoyed the character faces and expressions.  Some good and fun layouts and action.  I miss the lack of shading that could have really strengthened it.  The minimal use of texture is a bit superfluous and I'm not sure how I enjoy it being use as cloud cover.  Otherwise this was a really fun read with great composition and style.

bobo: jasper yelling 'gaaayy!' made me laugh a whole lot. i cant say much about this comic that hasn't already been said, but i've been thinking about those nipples.you could have done with fewer lines, because everyone knows what nipples look like and it's sexier to imply the shape. they sort of look like bolts and washers on ancelin and crikey. but this was funny and 'bye bitch' at the end was the perfect way to end it off!

golden: ancelin is really cute in this. i like the page with the close ups on all of the racers. on page six the racers are silhouetted, but it seems odd that ancelin is one of them because she's your opponent... but i like how you also had the banana peel work out in the end. this is cute and good.

BOBO- Wham bam thank you ma'am!

Maybe I've gotten spoiled after seeing the fantastic collab work between you and hiemie in past holiday comics, but this style you got going is surprisingly different. Its not bad, but I'm left wanting as I know when you're into what you're doing it shows. Your paneling overall feels kind of clunky to me. By that I mean you use large panels to showcase small minute actions and small panels to cram in events that I feel needed more space and breathing room to really be appreciated.

I did however like the romance scene. Its clear it was there here you seemed most comfortable as your paneling took on an ease and intimate feel- especially with your spot blacks and shadows. That last scene where Ancelin has Crikey on her chest was my fav bit.

I know you tried for humor, but it felt stilted? Or pulled in too many directions? I dunno exactly what it was you were trying to convey overall.


GOLDEN- But wait? does she get the date? The money?? I gotta know!

Suuuch a cute comic. Like really- your work really shines when you do art in this style. The look is appealing, adorable and the light grayscale colors and texture really add to this overall delicate aesthetic to the comic I really appreciate. It reminds me alot of old highschool doujinshi!

I found myself writing this critique before I even finished reading your comic because I wanted to ensure I didn't forget anything XD You have some fantastic paneling here as well. My particular fav is the top of page six where Crikey flies past the racing crowd as well as the confines of the panels themselves. When you're in a tourney, its easy to bum rush everything ,so the fact there are stylistic touches and flair of this type is something I wanted to commend you on. I was cracking up, actually cackling when Crikey turns up the jets and sends her poor croc super sonic. XD

both of these were great! also find it funny both sides decided to kill Koosh.

Bobo- thats one way to get ahead in a race, it was surprisingly cute and didnt linger on the sex, I had a lot of fun reading it I didnt really understand the jump in reasoning of them being Icky to Fine? but over all it worked really well.

Goldy- this style was really cute and unlike some chibi simplified styles I could tell who every one was and it was a ton of fun and very creative.

Great work!

@GOLDEN omg those chibis. I enjoyed the textured shading in yours as well, and the way CJ's jetpack is kind of fiddly. The irregular panels here were MY FAVORITE, I... I just have a thing for them. That is all. *skitters off into the darkness*

@BOBO omg dirty tactics Ancelin has! I would like to echo the shading recommendation, but I think I would like to point out how NICE your foreshortening was on the first page with that running pose. I really enjoyed the general plot and I really wasn't expecting seduction to happen in wacky races. Great surprise!  

Also thanks for all the critiques! I was disappointed at my comic without at least some spot blacks, but I was just too worn out and short on time. I think with my mental health as it is now I just need to avoid short deadlines

But I'm glad you guys enjoyed the comic at least a little!

@golden: If I'm reviewing everyone else's comic, it wouldn't be fair not to critique my own opponent's! I'm still mad at the fact that you were able to pull this off with barely any time to work on it. I mean, I can't really be mad because you're the one who has to deal with Life Problems  BUT STILL I envy your talent! I absolutely LOVE the way you wrote Ancelin. The comic as a whole had a very cartoony feel, in a good way. I think the ending was a bit abrupt, and would have preferred an extra page at the end instead of the exposition at the beginning. Still, you told a complete story with a full beginning, middle, and end, all the pieces in place. I'm assuming you went chibi because it's easier for you to draw quickly, but either way it worked really well. Everything is so cute and I'm just so happy with it. I think my favorite panel is bottom middle on page 6, because it's just SO RELATABLE! You are great, and I hope those Real Life things are getting worked out okay!

Golden: you are top notch at chibi, but maybe using realistic proportion in actions scenes could have accentuated their intensity?

Bobo: first off: DAT ASS sencond: maybee some grey there and there could have helped render the comic less... 2d looking? But i liked it nonetheless

Golden: I really like your grayscale and how little total black you use and stick with mainly mid-tones. The only thing I don't fully get is why Crickey emerging first from the smoke takes Ancelin out of the competition, maybe if it was a bet for their placements on the first checkpoint it would make more sense.

Bobo: Being new to void and not know your characters history I feel like some of the character interaction is lost on me. I didn't like the use of "TBH" on page 3, maybe it's because comic text tends to be mostly capitols but using slang like that in comics really sticks out more. However going through your comic on the second read-through I really enjoyed all the small details you put in the environment.

Bobo: I love the punching clouds! I wish there was more black/shades added here to fill the lines.

Golden: All that work on chibi style has paid off this is great and kinetic but i think some of the Clip Studio effects are overused

Keep it up guys!

Golden: Going for a chibi look with this race was a really unique choice that fits the tone! The entire banana peel gag was excellently composed overall for what little space there is there. Your paneling is also all very nice and dynamic! If I could point out one thing to improve, other than "have enough time to color it" which is quite a moonshot at an already highly ambitious 9 pages, is that Ancelin's loss didn't feel very specific to her, especially as someone who Crikey hit up a relationship with; anyone could've been in that vague area at the time.

Bobo: Can't read this one for obvious reasons (and as a consequence, can't vote on this battle! ), but thanks for putting up the thumbnails to telegraph what's up!

Bobo: I really like how you handled environments in your comic, really goes well when doing the race in the sky. I can see the nsfw things, but it doesn't really bother me as long as a story is told.

Golden: Really awesome work on the characters, environment, and actions in this. I had a lot of fun reading this. And now we understand how the gator gets his jetpacks, which is probably the best kind of vehicle man can ever invent.

I'm nominating CJ for Best Pet, what a good sport.

Bobo I am dying XD "Bye Bitch" //sheds a tear

FRANCE VS AUSTRALIA GO

BABEWATCH