Holy shit guys you weren’t kidding when you said this was longer than Arma. Or well, one side of it XD

The art was pretty damn good throughout, great action and colours on almost every page. Golden, pages 16 and 17 were absolutely gorgeous and probably my favourites here. Hats, you kicked off the comic with such a great start. Skulls, really dug your demon designs, they stood out to me amongst the more standard dragons and horned folk. Echo the comments about the credits page, I’ve never seen it done like that before but it’s a pretty smart way to go about it! And I love the epilogue page showing the video on Voidtube!

Overall though, and I’m sorry to say this because I saw you guys put so much effort into it but... this didn’t really gel for me. I feel like this collab was just, “Cool Girls of Void Get Together” without much thought to how they’d actually come to interact with one another? The story didn’t feel cohesive to me, with everybody just sort of stumbling across each other, and despite its length, each character’s individual conflict felt rushed or not addressed at all:

Xia gets a page to panic over Miller, and then it’s immediately brushed aside when Wizzie enters the picture. Crikey deals with her phantom pains once and then they never get brought up again. The question that started Raven off on a rampage, before she even drank the demon blood - where Rocio was - is forgotten as soon as she reverts to normal. Wizzie and Swan have this moment that’s supposed to be emotional, but there’s been no buildup beyond Wizzie calling her a French bitch earlier. It IS still a tender scene, but it could have been way more impactful if they’d started to build up a friendship before, or alternatively, been even MORE hostile to one another so the change of heart is more poignant. I think a good chunk of the fighting and exposition here could have been cut, or replaced with more in-depth interactions between the main characters (i.e. those actually in the collab instead of characters like Jiko). Either that or the more personal conflicts should have been shelved for later comics/brought up before this one, because their very brief inclusions make them feel like wasted potential at best, cheap emotional fodder at worst.

I have some more specific crits too that I’ll go into below.

Hats - Someone made a joke in the Discord that Wizzie was looking leathery, and I kind of agree. Her skin tone does not look natural, it is too pink-hued for a darker shade, unless you’re literally going for the “white but spent way too long in a tanning booth” look. I have some skin tone charts if you’d like to take a look. I don’t colour pick from them directly but I use them to kind of gauge whether my skin tones look right. Also Raven’s tits look like balloons in the last panel on page 38, which for me tipped the scene from drama to comedy.

Skulls - I know your stuff leans towards the stylised side, but the wings on page 4 were pretty formless. This is only emphasised by their large size combined with lack of detail.

Rivana - Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m gonna assume you mostly wrote those first few pages with Raven (5-6)? Because I saw similar flaws there that pop up in your other comics. Raven is telling herself information she’d already know, it’s just exposition for the reader, which isn’t even necessary because all the information she gives was summed up in the recap page! Page 24 also has some funky art. Raven’s body in the top panel has some really weird proportions, especially in the legs and hands, meanwhile in the final panel her face is in profile but her chest is pointing more towards the “camera” like a 3/4 view.

Golden - Page 15 I really thought that was a light-skinned Cairo for a second. The lips, the goatee, the hairstyle, the eyebrows, they’re all super similar. I wouldn’t call it sameface exactly but it was enough to make me double take, so keep an eye out for that I guess?

PS A question for Rivana: how exactly do Raven’s powers work? They’re supposed to be illusions right? I know the idea was that if people believe the illusions are real, they’re as good as real, but it feels like they go above and beyond that and it really confuses me. Like for instance, Wizzie goes to break them. Surely since she approaches them with the idea of “I’m gonna break them” they’ll break? Since they’re illusions? Are the only ways to escape them simply telling yourself they’re not real? Bc rn they seem pretty indestructible and very real.