I like that you both used these comics as a starting off point for larger stories, I think that's a smart use of a tight deadline. I also think art-wise both of these are really impressive for 24-hours. I take my hat off to you both.
Fluff- You had this great gag in the middle of your comic (the one about Kamens transformation taking too long) I love the concept, but I think you cut corners with the execution and it made the joke fall a bit flat.
- You choosing to draw just Kamens hand instead of a full-body transformation effected the clarity of what was happening. You also missed an opportunity to do a cheesy, classic transformation, which would have added to the humour.
- Also when Ricker asks "you done?" as he plays cards, it would've been great to actually see Kamen's reaction to such a thing!
For a 24-hour battle this crit might come across as a bit nit-picky (it kinda is) but I actually think this is a good example of cutting the wrong things to save time. This mid-comic gag imo is actually the meat of this comic and really should have had your full attention.
GO! GO! KAMEN CHAMPION! *Wicked Guitar Riff* / Rickter & Gus vs. Kamen Champion
Critiques & Comments
# 6
Posted:
Oct 31 2020, 04:11 AM
# 5
Posted:
Oct 30 2020, 09:22 PM
Woah it's really 24 hour battle time on the site eh?
Fluff - I'm not really sure what's happening here? Are they playing a DnD game and seeing it irl? Is it real, and if so why can Gus now manifest in a different form? I read Rivana's comment, and if you were going for "Kamen takes so long to transform that Rickter is playing a card game while waiting", that didn't come across for me, I think due to the fast pacing of the actual transformation. It could probably have been drawn out over more panels to show it was taking a long time. Still, good job for a day's battle! The expressions and background city texture were very effective.
Cab - I don't really think I can comment until I see the full story.
Fluff - I'm not really sure what's happening here? Are they playing a DnD game and seeing it irl? Is it real, and if so why can Gus now manifest in a different form? I read Rivana's comment, and if you were going for "Kamen takes so long to transform that Rickter is playing a card game while waiting", that didn't come across for me, I think due to the fast pacing of the actual transformation. It could probably have been drawn out over more panels to show it was taking a long time. Still, good job for a day's battle! The expressions and background city texture were very effective.
Cab - I don't really think I can comment until I see the full story.
# 4
Posted:
Oct 30 2020, 06:43 AM
This is a battle that I didn't see happening from a mile away. Both comics are entertaining but neither of them offered an ending so I suppose there is a round 2 coming up? I hope so.
Fluffs - Love your humor as always. And what is this I see? Rickter can summon Gus's now? This is new and exciting. I do wish we got a glimpse on why Rickter wants to destroy the community center though! The poker game transpiring while Kamen Champion's transformation sequence was my favorite part.
Cab - I love how you picked up from the last Armageddon on your side and how this tied in to Kamen's death in the last SDT. I thought Rickter also looked really cool in your style as well!
Fluffs - Love your humor as always. And what is this I see? Rickter can summon Gus's now? This is new and exciting. I do wish we got a glimpse on why Rickter wants to destroy the community center though! The poker game transpiring while Kamen Champion's transformation sequence was my favorite part.
Cab - I love how you picked up from the last Armageddon on your side and how this tied in to Kamen's death in the last SDT. I thought Rickter also looked really cool in your style as well!
# 3
Posted:
Oct 25 2020, 01:16 PM
AH! Love it! Thank you for battling me Cab!!!
# 2
Posted:
Oct 25 2020, 11:44 AM
My goal was 3 but I only got 2, still had a lot of fun on it!
# 1
Posted:
Oct 24 2020, 10:20 PM
This is now gonna be a 2-parter from my half, I had more story to tell but ran out of time so I decided to break it up and hopefully get it done soon at a later date. I planned too much for a 24hr battle, but it was a pleasure fighting ya Fluff, you'll see more of your big guy in the next pages :-)
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