Congratulations on getting this in! I remember seeing pages in the incubator for what felt like forever, great to see it finally done! This is a good setup, it makes me curious about what’s going on and what Eva is going to do next. I also like the use of different camera angles and the action poses Eva is in while flying, especially the one on page 2! I know that’s a really tough pose and angle to pull off well.
On the other hand, I said this before in the Discord and I’ll say it again, the shading is pretty off and it was very distracting. Things are in shadow on completely different sides even in the same panel, and you took the time to add shadows for individual blades of grass but not draw a main character’s one correctly. I strongly suggest practicing your shading. In addition, I think you should decide whether you want grass or not - a green flat plain with scattered, detailed single grass blades looks very odd and clashes with the more 3D-looking mountains, especially since there appears to be no river banks at all and it connects straight to the water.
Intro Story / "Eva"
Critiques & Comments
# 6
Posted:
Jun 10 2019, 09:02 PM
# 5
Posted:
Jun 9 2019, 05:52 PM
Wow, you've improved a lot in the time I've been gone! Your staging is pretty good, although I wonder if there was a way on the last page to preserve what side of the imaginary line Eva had just crossed to.
The way he seems to have just dropped her in the water suggests there should be a nice big splash, unless he used powers to slowly lower her in or something like that.
The way he seems to have just dropped her in the water suggests there should be a nice big splash, unless he used powers to slowly lower her in or something like that.
# 4
Posted:
Jun 7 2019, 02:30 PM
Congrats on getting her in! I feel like this showcases how much you’ve improved .
I will have to agree with Badger in that I feel like the sudden trust of a stranger dumping her body into a river after telling her it’s the only place to hide her body is a little jarring and I feel like Eva should have soooo many questions.
Hopefully she’ll be asking those questions in battles though!
I will have to agree with Badger in that I feel like the sudden trust of a stranger dumping her body into a river after telling her it’s the only place to hide her body is a little jarring and I feel like Eva should have soooo many questions.
Hopefully she’ll be asking those questions in battles though!
# 3
Posted:
Jun 6 2019, 06:50 AM
This was a long road comin' and something of an artistic gauntlet, but I'm glad you persevered and committed to getting this done. Grats on the intro comic- now get to battling!
# 2
Posted:
Jun 5 2019, 12:50 PM
I like these colors you’ve got here- the backgrounds, the dark night setting, its all pretty good and fitting for the story! My biggest question is why did Eva believe the mysterious person so quickly? It just feels a bit sudden- but this is good stuff and congrats on getting her in!!
# 1
Posted:
Jun 3 2019, 08:21 PM
congrats on getting her in, I know you have been struggling with this but it's great she's in so you cna move onto your next project. I do also like that you're adding more background elements and different colors which i think fit the mood.
Beyond Battle
Ended:
Jun 10th, 2019
Votes Cast:
18
Page Views:
1450
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