JUSTA- Humors on point, 'I just wanna suck' is gonna become a vampire mantra XD You have some great interiors of this mansion and obvious creative chops with layout, but overall the whole comic had a rough quality I don't usually know you for.
PIZZA- Equally rough comic, which surprises me as the 5 week deadline seemed like it would afford some time for spit and polish. Still, I dug the conflict of mistaken identity and subsequent DRAGGING of Jingles crappy life that the original wanted to be shot XD Gallows humor indeed, but chuckles all around.
Jingles vs. Burmeister
Critiques & Comments
# 11
Posted:
Jan 3 2021, 10:33 PM
# 10
Posted:
Jan 1 2021, 02:59 PM
Justaryhmes: this was a fun story and the silly jokes were nice. I appreciated the anti-climax ending. My only crit is that some of the compositions where confusing, whenever you had a tall panel on the left side i would always end up missing the bottom speech bubbles because i would immediately went to the next panel since those speech bubbles were closer. This left me a little confused since it ended up being easier to read out of order. Still and overall funny comic.
Pizza: I really like this story, it was a cool twist on the clones and the imposter with both of them fighting to be the imposter. Also the ending was good. I like the sketch style but i think you can clean up some bits to make it look more consistent, there are some parts cleaner than others and would have liked to see stuff like no one of the faces having the structure lines, also adding some quick sketch stuff to include more details in the background will help as well. The muted colors also work great for this one. You mentioned retiring brumiester but i do hope to see him soon or some more comics soon since you're improving at this.
Pizza: I really like this story, it was a cool twist on the clones and the imposter with both of them fighting to be the imposter. Also the ending was good. I like the sketch style but i think you can clean up some bits to make it look more consistent, there are some parts cleaner than others and would have liked to see stuff like no one of the faces having the structure lines, also adding some quick sketch stuff to include more details in the background will help as well. The muted colors also work great for this one. You mentioned retiring brumiester but i do hope to see him soon or some more comics soon since you're improving at this.
# 9
Posted:
Dec 31 2020, 05:18 PM
Justa: Lol, loved the Dracula angle you took with this, v amusing! I'm with Cy, it's a bit of low-brow humor but all the "let me suck" jokes had me giggling like a 12 year old XDD Not sure how to feel about the ending, though--the joke of Burmeister just agreeing to help anyways was funny but at the same time it kind of made it feel like the whole conflict was all for nothing? Still, though! An enjoyable comic. When you did have backgrounds they looked very nice, and imo the slight wobble to the lines felt natural for the most part, not sloppy. I honestly think my biggest gripe is a personal thing which is pretty minor, especially since it's not really limited to just this comic but almost all of your Jingles comics, but... I'm not overly fond of the way you depict Jingles' mouth. You do such fun expressions, and so having Jingles' mouth look almost the exact same in every panel was a little... distracting/disappointing. Plus I'm just overall not personally fond of that style of mouth in general, so take that with a grain of salt!
Pizza- It took me a bit to figure out what was going on, but I feel like you pulled off that kind of an intro pretty well by making it clear what's going on by page 2/3. Loved the first page especially for fun shots, with at first only showing the characters in silhouette and in part. Real good job on that car btw!! The clone trying to steal the identity of the real Jingles was, admittedly, a little cliche, but I think you saved it by the twist of having them then switch to trying to convince Burmeister they were the impostor. XD Nice little bit of dark humor, hehe. The sketchy lineart works well overall, but imo there's some places where it would benefit from being cleaned up just a little more, and even though they're just in a desert I kind of wish there had been a little more detail tossed in there--a rock, or a cactus, or even some more cracks in the dust. Maybe a scorpion scuttling across the background? The car also kind of disappears for most of the comic--just putting a yellow blob in the background or the side of some of the panels might help! I also think there's a few panels where you could benefit from bringing the horizon into the shot a bit more--especially on page 6. The camera angles for much of page 6 suggest we should be able to see at least a sliver of the sky (like on page 8 ), and yet all we see is ground. That said, I actually really like the ending, though it left off on a bit of a cliffhanger I thought it was a nice note to leave off on, and leaves me wondering where Burmeister will go from here!
Pizza- It took me a bit to figure out what was going on, but I feel like you pulled off that kind of an intro pretty well by making it clear what's going on by page 2/3. Loved the first page especially for fun shots, with at first only showing the characters in silhouette and in part. Real good job on that car btw!! The clone trying to steal the identity of the real Jingles was, admittedly, a little cliche, but I think you saved it by the twist of having them then switch to trying to convince Burmeister they were the impostor. XD Nice little bit of dark humor, hehe. The sketchy lineart works well overall, but imo there's some places where it would benefit from being cleaned up just a little more, and even though they're just in a desert I kind of wish there had been a little more detail tossed in there--a rock, or a cactus, or even some more cracks in the dust. Maybe a scorpion scuttling across the background? The car also kind of disappears for most of the comic--just putting a yellow blob in the background or the side of some of the panels might help! I also think there's a few panels where you could benefit from bringing the horizon into the shot a bit more--especially on page 6. The camera angles for much of page 6 suggest we should be able to see at least a sliver of the sky (like on page 8 ), and yet all we see is ground. That said, I actually really like the ending, though it left off on a bit of a cliffhanger I thought it was a nice note to leave off on, and leaves me wondering where Burmeister will go from here!
# 8
Posted:
Dec 31 2020, 11:40 AM
These were both pretty fun to go through.
Jingles and Count are an odd pair
Jingles and Count are an odd pair
# 7
Posted:
Dec 27 2020, 10:08 PM
Justin- rough visuals aside the humor is the star here. The writing kept me laughing throughout as well as the characters' expressions were great. Burmeister's blank planky posture got me giggling and I don't know why.
Pizza- despite the fact that the lines are still sketchy I really liked the posing and framing you had here. The action looked much more lively here compared to your other comics.
Next time though be sure to give your text some more space in the balloons. Some of the words ran into the borders making them harder to read than needed.
Pizza- despite the fact that the lines are still sketchy I really liked the posing and framing you had here. The action looked much more lively here compared to your other comics.
Next time though be sure to give your text some more space in the balloons. Some of the words ran into the borders making them harder to read than needed.
# 6
Posted:
Dec 27 2020, 07:05 AM
Justarhymes - This comic yeeted me back to my 12 y/o self bc I was stupidly giggling every time a variant of “let me suck” came up. Other than that though, I didn’t find it that funny and found the conclusion a bit of a letdown. From a visual standpoint, the establishing shots like on page 3 were cool, the way you did them was evocative of a ballpoint pen on paper, which I haven’t seen before on the site!
Pizza Man - Yo I’m digging this loose sketchy style. It feels a lot more lively and organic than your last comic. The dynamic you have between Burmeister and Jingles is really fun too, and while it’s a tad cliche, I admit I still find clones fighting to be the “real impostor” kinda funny. Though the ending wasn’t really clear to me, I enjoyed this overall!
Pizza Man - Yo I’m digging this loose sketchy style. It feels a lot more lively and organic than your last comic. The dynamic you have between Burmeister and Jingles is really fun too, and while it’s a tad cliche, I admit I still find clones fighting to be the “real impostor” kinda funny. Though the ending wasn’t really clear to me, I enjoyed this overall!
# 5
Posted:
Dec 27 2020, 01:16 AM
These were both really fun comics, nice job!
Justarhymes- This was a very silly and goofy comic, and I am here for all of it. Jingles is such a good cat friend! I'm glad that you were able to complete a comic in time!
Pizzaman- I liked the humor in yours, the reference to Count Burmeister having fought so many cats on Void already was a nice touch.
Justarhymes- This was a very silly and goofy comic, and I am here for all of it. Jingles is such a good cat friend! I'm glad that you were able to complete a comic in time!
Pizzaman- I liked the humor in yours, the reference to Count Burmeister having fought so many cats on Void already was a nice touch.
# 4
Posted:
Dec 26 2020, 12:50 PM
I was afraid I would have to default a few days ago, but managed to condense the comic I had planned enough to get something in. Doing a battle in the middle of a move might not have been a great idea, but I still had fun with this!
# 3
Posted:
Dec 16 2020, 11:16 AM
I seem to recall someone saying he was going to take a break from making comics. I'm glad that's not true.
# 2
Posted:
Nov 15 2020, 02:36 PM
The legend returns.
# 1
Posted:
Nov 15 2020, 09:28 AM
Hooray.
Regular Match
Drawing Time:
5 weeks + 1
Ended:
Jan 3rd, 2021
Votes Cast:
18
Page Views:
1113
Winner:
Pizza Man
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Artist
JUSTA- I like the 'I can't suck blood of immortals' caveat you added for the Count. Jingles is such a fun character to watch and I love his chemistry with the Count (in a non shippy way lol). By the end of your comic, all I could think about is if Raven says "I wanna suck you." to her potential victims from here on out..it might be a very bad idea for her lmao.
PIZZA - Again, love the writing and the chemistry comment above with Justa's version also rings true here. The text within the speech bubbles could use some breathing room too as they feel cramped a bit. The serious talk between Jingles and Count that you added in the end was unexpected (you led me to believe that this was gonna be a gag/comedy comic through and through) and I really loved it!