Where my wee little ideas may hatch.

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #25 on: Feb 23, 2016, 10:30 PM »
Considering these *look* like digital pages, which I can only assume affords you layers to take advantage of, why are your initial sketch pages so light? With the freedom to get messy and really get in there to work some concepts, these pages almost look like you're afraid to approach the events from panel to panel. Don't be afraid to get messy at this point. Commit to these sketches and charge in with some nitty gritty environment mock ups. Scrawl in some word bubbles so we have some context as to what we're looking at- or if the dialogue isn't as pertinent, make the images have more of an explanation as to whats going on.

To be blunt, this looks like the bare minimum and I think its bleeding into your narrative. As it stands these pages at pure face value don't grab me.

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #26 on: Feb 24, 2016, 12:37 PM »
Yeah, I hardly spent much time on this, so I'm not surprised you said that. I probably should have worked on it a bit more before I asked for help. Anyway, here's some more details I put in. I guess I just wanted to fix it up at the first sign of a problem, so I never did much to begin with, lmao.

So, I wanted to give an idea of how Clem gets to Void. Her mace, Abendstern, is a kind of deity that feeds on fear (if any of y'all would like me to explain the backstory that I've made so far, I'd be glad to, but for now I'm gonna try to stay on topic). Abendstern transports her to a desolate area outside of Void, at which point she will wake up and naturally approach the city for obvious reasons.

Abendstern can talk, but has yet to. Clementine just tends to talk to it, because there are no [regular] humans around in her world. She knows that it's powerful and feeds on fear, but doesn't know much more than that.

I suppose I'm kind of restless about getting a character submitted. I'm really motivated to make a comic involving a fight between two characters, but not so much Clem's intro. That's probably something I should change.

This whole thing is just really frustrating to me. It's hard, but I can't thank you guys enough for the help. I don't think I've learned much (that's more my fault than anyone else's), but I've never actually had any assistance with learning how to draw. Hopefully, I can drastically change my art within a few months.



Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #27 on: Feb 24, 2016, 01:16 PM »
Quote
I suppose I'm kind of restless about getting a character submitted. I'm really motivated to make a comic involving a fight between two characters, but not so much Clem's intro.

I get that, I think a lot of people tend to feel that way. Try to think of this as a way for people to get excited about fighting your character. It's easy to fall into this mindset of just doing the bare minimum, so just think about the things you'd like to do when you're in a battle. Action? Fight scene? Exciting dialogue?!
You don't need to tell the story of Clem literally coming to void if that's not exciting for you to draw. Draw her in the streets of void fighting some monster to the death. Maybe she's been in the city for a week or a month already. Maybe she's already met some void citizens?
Draw something you enjoy, because all we are really looking for is that you're putting in the effort and have the basics down and you'll get in. Anatomy, background, effort ... just show us that and the rest of the flavor can be whatever. Maybe that will help you get past the intro hurdle?

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #28 on: Feb 26, 2016, 02:33 PM »
PROGRESS.

Some things that I'm not sure about.
-Horizon in the first panel
-Lighting in third panel


Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #29 on: Feb 26, 2016, 04:30 PM »
yeah your guy is too close to the horizon/way too big for where he is, and cities tend to radiate light, not shadows.
"I knew when I sighned up for Void years ago, Someday I'm going to prison for this site"  - Mister Kent, words to live by

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #30 on: Feb 26, 2016, 05:31 PM »
Yeah, didn't know what to do about the city. The sun is supposed to be rising from behind the view perspective, and I didn't exactly think about how it would affect the sky's light vs the city's light.

*
Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #31 on: Feb 26, 2016, 11:58 PM »
It might help to essentially make the sky look like you did in the other panel, with the shadows beneath the clouds. Maybe some slight shadow that is even along the horizon and not a glowing orb of darkness around the city; but I feel like if the shadow is able to reach that high up along the skyline, it's dark enough for lights to be on in the city. Otherwise, the city being as tall as it is would probably be reflecting the sun on the other side and still be bright.

I get that it's weird though. Earth's shadow is iffy because it's all spherical and atmosphere-related and no one likes to take pictures facing away from the sunset so good luck finding refs. You may be able to search a skyline time-lapse video though to help get an idea of lighting it.
"When a problem comes along, you must whip it" -Simon Belmont

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #32 on: Feb 27, 2016, 03:14 AM »
Good to see you back and gearing up again :)

In regards to the bottom panel, try to make the skyline the darkest area, and maybe pick out little bright pinpricks of light in it. Try to reverse your gradients on the ground/sky. The horizon should be the darkest bit, but not too dark, so the skyline is still vivid against it.  The underside of the clouds would benefit from being darkest just to be easily read, and a good way to show the direction of light would be to have clem and the cacti casting long shadows onto the ground.

otherwise, good stuff! keep going and put everything you have into this, it'd be great to get you in!

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #33 on: Mar 02, 2016, 11:36 AM »
I didn't like the 2nd page, and I wanted it to be not boring, so, surprise.

Snake.


Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #34 on: Mar 14, 2016, 11:45 AM »
Gah, school is killing me. I really want to work on this stuff, but I can't. WHAT DO??

Here's the teeny bit of progress I've made. I really like the snake, but I'm going to despise having to draw it again.


Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #35 on: Mar 15, 2016, 11:34 AM »
OKAY! DONE THE SECOND PAGE. Hopefully, I can get more done over break, because I'm going to Florida and I'm going to relax the entire time.

I'm really liking the snake. A lot.


Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #36 on: Mar 15, 2016, 12:39 PM »
-manually brush in the grass rather than resorting to that grass brush cause it's really obvious

-don't forget the plateaus and cacti from the previous page

-speaking of which he's in the middle of absolutely nothing how did that ginormous snake sneak up on him like that  (and on the reader; we just finished seeing he's all alone in the last page)

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #37 on: Mar 15, 2016, 01:20 PM »
Oh, it's an invisible snake thing. The following pages are gonna show it cloaking. Also, Clementine's a female. No biggie tho, because she looks pretty masculine.

I'll probably have it start to cloak, and then Clementine kills it.

Dear god, I need to find a way to put more effort into this and still enjoy working on it. Little details are my bane.

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #38 on: Mar 15, 2016, 01:52 PM »
focus on how you'll feel after the fact, the satisfaction of giving it that extra effort~


Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #39 on: Mar 16, 2016, 06:43 PM »
First off, I wanna say I really, really hope you make it into Void. Your art is just so cool!  In fact, your "lazy" sketches are better than what I struggle on for days.  Of course school takes priority, but it'd be sweet to see you duke it out with the greats one of these days.

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #40 on: Mar 18, 2016, 01:49 PM »
DANK

YOU

SO

MUCH

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #41 on: Apr 05, 2016, 11:45 AM »
oh my lord

I'm nearly done.

After a few months of procrastinating working really hard all the time, the 3rd page is basically complete and the 4th and final page is in progress. It took me a long time (too long for 4 fucking pages, which I'm not happy about), but I've put a ton of effort into this one.




So now I'm going to feel bad about myself and how I can't immediately learn how to make shit look better over all and find motivation to work on it often.

It's so fuckignFRUSTRATING HNNNNNNNNG

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #42 on: Apr 05, 2016, 12:56 PM »
cool

wait, which one's the 3rd page?

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #43 on: Apr 05, 2016, 01:27 PM »
The super long one

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #44 on: Apr 05, 2016, 01:45 PM »
oh ok cool, i'll say some things for pg 3 once i see it completed~

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #45 on: Apr 06, 2016, 12:00 PM »
AIGHT

page 3 is done


Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #46 on: Apr 06, 2016, 01:40 PM »
it doesn't look done quite yet actually!

What you're doing to try and make it like the snake is camouflaging or going invisible needs more work, it looks unfinished!

Panels 1 & 2: There's no reference in the background to show that the snake is actually disappearing so  it looks like the panel is just being dipped in milk or something. Add some clouds and rocky mountains and birds or something in the background to show it appearing through the serpent's body while it's disappearing

Panel 3: Add some rocks and other debris on the ground too, and the serpent's lines even then are very carelessly drawn, no gaps in the lineart, etc.

Panel 4/5?: Separating the font with the gutter like that I don't think is working, just have the word bubble up over the two panels

Panel 6: What about the warrior's legs, shouldn't we see them through the serpent's disappearing trick?

Panel 6-7: Your weapon is dark in shade but here it feels like you forgot/chose not to shade it in?

Panel 7: your serpent's screech is very tepidly written, it doesn't feel like he's putting alot of effort into his screech if you know what I mean O: One way you can add emphasis to these is by writing over the same font again a few times so it looks frenetic. if you don't know what i mean I can show you later tonight~

All panels: It feels like the light source changed direction?? in the last page the sun was hitting the girl's back, but she turned around to face this serpent thing, but now they're switched around again?

All in all you're getting there but not quite there yet~




Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #47 on: Apr 06, 2016, 01:51 PM »
Your character sheet is really strong, and your want your first intro pages to show off some of that strength and effort. It just doesn't feel like you're giving these pages as much love as you're capable of giving

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #48 on: Apr 06, 2016, 02:48 PM »
thanks for the tips. I'll get working on that.

About the divided panel, Manga Studio wouldn't let me put the bubble over the gap, which is stupid. currently trying to fix that.

Anyway, while I'm probably capable of doing more work on this (which, thanks for overestimating me :D) I just don't feel okay with the fact that this took me more than a few months. I don't know how much longer it would take if I colored it. What some people get done in 2 weeks is at least triple what I can get done in half a year, and I don't know what to do about that.

Re: Where my wee little ideas may hatch.
« Reply #49 on: Apr 06, 2016, 02:59 PM »
why don't you look at your time being spent daily on drawing

you need to understand if this is a motivational issue and how that's affecting you (whether it's that you don't touch your pages for days on end between time, or you sit down and it takes you hours to work on a single panel because you're distracted/can't focus)

How free is your actual free time, are you constantly being hailed by friends/family members or do you have legit time to yourself? And how many hours on average do you have for drawing each day?

How are you drawing, with a tablet or mouse?

You should be able to fix all the things I mentioned in 3 hours at the most, I should think.

 

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