Thanks! The only reason I wrote the dialogue like that on this one was because I knew I was running against the clock and wouldn't be able to make everything clear, so I threw that in to try and help mitigate any potential issues that would have arisen from that. So I figured I would just over explain. Had it not been a 24 hour affair it would have all been tighter for sure haha.
Aight lemme drop some sicknasty commentation up in this hizzle.
First off, great fuckin job man. The page-output alone is mindblowing, let alone at the quality you did it at. It's dynamic as all hell and the action really feels like its on a grand scale. Plus your use of screentones is literally top-notch. And I won't even knock ya for a straight-to-the-action script, since everything else just serves to amp that up.
But now, of course, the crit-bits. You definitely wear your japanese influence on your wrist with this one, and thats fine, but you fall into a lot of the same traps too. A lotta very explanatory dialogue mid-fight only serves to bring it to a bit of a halt. Like, itd be totally fine if you had a Signature Move Name at the bottom of the panel, like Shining Rose Cannon, and then blew us away with what it looked like. Like we totally get you wrote how everyones powers work and what exactly they can do, but telling us that when you dont have to is a bit much. And I personally would like to see a bit more spot-blacks used on the characters themselves, just to differentiate whose-who a little. Mostly because in some pulled out shots Midori and Maple got abit hard to tell apart. Or maybe try working with bigger shapes so characters are super-readable from a distance.
But overall, I dug the shit out of it, and great work!
another year, another charlie action comic for 24 hour comics day so you already basically know what to expect really, but I had fun drawing it 'cuz its what I like to draw. There are a few segments I am actually kind of somewhat proud of even if the art is rough as shit.
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