i feel like this comic could have been saved if it was a setup to some kind of hilarious gag because its really hard to take this character seriously as a warrior ^^;
I actually scrapped six pages and re drew all of this in about 5 hours the day I uploaded it. :\ so... yeah the line quality suuuuucks. sorry. I would have worked on it more but the rest of the week was late shifts (12, 12, 17, and 12 hours.) so I was working on getting as much done as possible in a short amount of time. my problem with time management agian.
baby barbarians mother is the mountains depicted in the panel. That's in his bio and in the first comic.
I jumped to far into the characters. Attila dressed his wound because the child got shot in the conflict with the mimes who had intruded on attila's territory which obviously wasn't as clearly described in my last installment as I thought. I've always believed less is more with dialogue so what Attila said "the mimes know not to fight on Attila's turf. now so do you" it was meant to imply he simply dispatched them for being on his turf with knowledge of his rules. This has worked for me in longer form stories but I guess not here.
then because baby was on his turf he expects him to follow his rules. in the case, fight for his amusement.
I could go further into Attila's character but I will attempt to describe him better in a future Baby-B Beyond Battle.
so, time management, dialogue and clarity, reiterations, more greying my colours. at least no one said anything about my backgrounds/environments this time. if anything they didn't get worse. :\
If this is coming off your last battle with me, and going off on the events given on your side, I'm still a bit thrown. There's no rapport with B.B or Attila to explain anything from the get-go. Why did Attila take B.B to his lair? If he's taken this big baby captive only to put him in pit fights, why have someone dress his wound? Why even save him from marauding mimes in the city if he just wanted him to rumble? Is mentioning Baby barbarians mother on page 2 and then showing a close up of Attila's face meant to imply Attila is his Mother? Or Father maybe? I already had questions regarding your last battle, but this comic compounds that and adds questions upon questions.
Also, I'm super curious as to your tools. Are you 'inking' your comic pages with a tablet? A cintiq? or a mouse? I'm comparing your lines here to that of your last battle and it feels to have dropped in quality. On page 1 alone the weapons are squiggles and there's an idea of a woman's form lounging on the throne, but there are no defining features or faces. You had four weeks to really give this comic the TLC it needed, so the turnout really confuses me.
well this comes right off the previous battle with mimi, but obviously I'm still figuring out the medium. I've never liked serialized fiction because it requires so much re-iteration. regardless that's no excuse for writing in a publishing format that requires it.
the villain is Attila and baby has been thinking about his mother this entire time due to just leaving her. bad writing. I'll do better next time.
I'm with le Fred here with confusion about the purpose of the story. What did you want to convey to the audience with telling this story? I also agree with the roughness if your inks and colors don't look very well together. Maybe If the colors weren't so highly saturated that style could have worked out. Keep making more stories! I'd love to see where BB goes!
I have to say I felt a little lost here. Not in so much as I didn't get what was happening on the page as much as I was unsure where any of this was coming from or going to. Why mention the mother flashback if you're not going to do anything about it? It doesn't seem to come into play in any meaningful way. The fact that you show a close up of a face we may not be totally familiar with just after talking of his mother also makes it that moment snag a little, as I struggled to determine if we were meant to begin a flashback sequence. Your rough lines do have a certain charm, though I don't think the coloring complements it rightly. The colour choices themselves are appropriate, but the softness with the roughness makes it look cheaper than it could. Regardless, I appreciate the effort in doing more with Baby Barbarian and trying to link it with other comics, and I certainly hope to see more in the future.
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