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Intro Story
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Uploaded September 04, 2016
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Comments (6)

Kozispoon's avatar
Kozispoon
All-Rounder
8 years ago
Oh you know my thinks- I typed at length in your feedback email when this was in approvals, so no sense repeating myself. Suffice to say-welcome! Hope this little Gale raises hell ;D
Posted on Intro Story battle

Animeshen's avatar
Animeshen
All-Rounder
8 years ago
You finally got her in! Great job! Aside from the occasional wonky perspective I think this is among the highest quality comics youve produced on the site, cant wait to see gale in action!
Posted on Intro Story battle

PyrasTerran's avatar
PyrasTerran
Writer
8 years ago
this is a great piece of work coming from you and I hope we see this level of quality moving forward. Listen to folks' advice, take what you can, and keep on improving, hope to see this girl in a battle sooner rather than later
Posted on Intro Story battle

petarvee's avatar
petarvee
All-Rounder
8 years ago
You made The Wizard of Oz fresh and interesting without feeling too much like a rip-off. So kudos to you on that! And on page 2, that twister's lookin fresh-as-fuk. My two big notes are faces and architecture. You've got a better handle on figures and actions than on facial expressions. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing. But seeing the really nice shots of Gale running and cowering right next to her "shocked" face, really highlights the gap. Mostly that the expressions look a bit generic. Like they'd fit anyones face, or like they came out of a book. There's nothing about Gale's big expressions that reads unique to Gale. She could be an ugly crier, a fainter, someone who pales at the sight of danger, she could get barfy, she could bite her lip, she could grind her teeth, etc. Little things unique to her to really convince us she's a person over a character. And the other note is to just put a bit more time into your cityscapes. The shot of Void City on the last page looks comparatively wonky, especially for something made of concrete and steel. But overall, good job!
Posted on Intro Story battle

Elyan's avatar
Elyan
All-Rounder
8 years ago
i think this is great as an intro. the wizard of oz vibe really comes along. i somehow would have liked her forms be shown in that little running sequence as memories popping up... but its in the ref. i believe you could have found a better way to paint that tornado but other than that i think you did a good job over all. keep practicing those effects and backgrounds and this will get even better. i´m curious how you play her out.
Posted on Intro Story battle

Radji's avatar
Radji
All-Rounder
8 years ago
daaaaaamn, unfortunatly for you Gale, Void is no Oz... it's not even in Kansas, lol ^^ we had a diminishing ratio of magicals lately, glad to see even more of them come to magic up things !
Posted on Intro Story battle