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The Crown Jewels
This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.
Uploaded February 20, 2015
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Comments (10)

Kuro's avatar
Kuro
All-Rounder
9 years ago
[quote]With regards to the negative space, I knew there was going to be a lot of text and didn't want to clutter any more than it was already going to be. I was also thinking to short youtube segments of people standing at a bar or table with a tripod and blank wall behind them. At the same time, i still think you could've maybe established a background at the top. And to cut down on clutter, you could've just added some darker tones behind everything to add depth & make the focal points stand out.
Posted on The Crown Jewels battle

Kozispoon's avatar
Kozispoon
All-Rounder
9 years ago
I think I'm with Kuro in that I was left wanting for a story. This honestly feels like something I could find on the forums. Like in the jams. Actually, it would've fit great in the king and queen of void battle hype jam... There is no bar, there is no world or environment in this comic. Just two folks makin' a drink in a vacuum. If there was a nod to the fact they were on television it may of helped. I dunno. Its a cute idea, but I'm left underwhelmed.
Posted on The Crown Jewels battle

Minteh's avatar
Minteh
All-Rounder
9 years ago
I guess I didn't really think about the fact this would be up for voting and critique, I know that's a big part of the site and somehow it just slipped out of my mind. I did not put everything I had into this as it was intended to be something small and fun, but I'm very much thinking now whether there was a point to post something up that I didn't go at with 100% - not because of the feedback, but just that I should always be going full speed. With regards to the negative space, I knew there was going to be a lot of text and didn't want to clutter any more than it was already going to be. I was also thinking to short youtube segments of people standing at a bar or table with a tripod and blank wall behind them. While it made sense during creation, I see how it's a boring read. There will be more comics in this vein, in fact there are three more drinks in the same series, but I'll look to polish them more. This character is based around cocktails/shots/drinks in general, combining my interests, so I hope that you can enjoy what I have come up with thus far and in the future both on the pages I put up and in your kitchen!
Posted on The Crown Jewels battle

Kuro's avatar
Kuro
All-Rounder
9 years ago
Hype's neat, but personally, I'd just rather read a story. I mean I got a little turned off when I realized that's what it was. I'm with Wei in that the negative space really kills this thing. Even if you were avoiding background for some kind of an effect, there's a couple of things you could've done to liven it up some. I also think that's a disproportionate amount of text for 3 pages, made a little worse by the fact that it sits HUGE on the page. Like between font size & the leading in each line, you're losing a great deal of space there that could be tightened & utilized to give us more room for art. To break the larger chunks of text up, I think you could've paced them out a little better with the step by step of the actual process more. Instead of showing one image of something being poured & mentioning the addition of two ingredients, maybe show each ingredient & tweak the angles a little more. Which is another thing. I get the presentation format but when showing the characters, it's the same shots from pretty much the same angles. Things like the wrap up & the interjections could've been done a little differently to spice it up more. You could show a character holding something to more of a side angle or something. Vary it up from front end shot to front end shot over & over, you know?
Posted on The Crown Jewels battle

A Bad Idea's avatar
A Bad Idea
All-Rounder
9 years ago
This was an interesting little comic, very succinct and easy to understand. I do feel as though having at least a single establishing shot of a bar or something would help set the scene and add a dash of flavor. I also feel that selective color use would help not only identify each drink, but also to demonstrate the effect of the drinks blending colors, since that seems to be the key feature of this particular drink. With a few improvements and a bit more time, this could be a very interesting little mini-series. Keep it up!
Posted on The Crown Jewels battle

Wei Ingnan's avatar
Wei Ingnan
All-Rounder
9 years ago
excuse me Bartender, this martini is much too dry. Mint, while I strongly commend you for trying to do somthing a little fun and different; this comic just is not up to your own artistic standards and falls short even past that. You certainly had a good idea and also designed the layout of the page and panels very well(your greatest strength overall on this comic), but when it came time to render the contents of those panels you came up severely wanting. Its dull, boring and lifeless....and not because of the narrative or design choices....because of the artistic ones. There is way too much negative space and line inconsistency throughout the comic.....practice your rendering regularly and consistently and get the confidence your work so desperately needs....add some details thru line, pattern or tone...or even limited palette colour like monochrome or duochrome work....focus on how you are making and using your lines. I would like to see you continue this theme and work on the areas I have mentioned.
Posted on The Crown Jewels battle

Minteh's avatar
Minteh
All-Rounder
10 years ago
Uploaded! There will be more to come for this specific theme/series! I'm hoping to maybe make this a regular thing.
Posted on The Crown Jewels battle

Minteh's avatar
Minteh
All-Rounder
10 years ago
The uploading of this is going to be delayed by a day or two due to some issues with our scanner, I gotta go out and grab a USB so I can get my pages onto the comp, 'cause it won't register it at all. I hope you're still looking forward to it!
Posted on The Crown Jewels battle

Animeshen's avatar
Animeshen
All-Rounder
10 years ago
I have many a time felt like drinking a gemstone
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Minteh's avatar
Minteh
All-Rounder
10 years ago
In case you've ever felt like drinking a gemstone
Posted on The Crown Jewels battle