Thank you guys for the crits! It's always nice to see what I need work on. :'>

I actually wasn't expecting this kind of story from both y'all, especially since I was looking forward to seeing how you would both move your characters' stories forward, but it still was kind of cute to see them bond in both comics. Mags: Jong and Pocky nailed down what I wanted to first say about your comic, so I'd just suggest that you might want to try something other than the usual Mammon fight choreography. I think doing some research on how action/kung fu films are shot might help you with drawing out a fight better than an exchange of blows, like Jong said. I'd also like to see you build off of the story you've been slowly building with him in every other comic. Aside from that, your linework is solid as always. Push those backgrounds, though! Colored voids are bad! Geeps: Shame this isn't finished! I liked what you did with your angles in regards to the background, but I really think you could push the way you rendered certain objects (like mammon's hands, the bottles, etc) so that they look less flat and more three-dimensional, as well as stand out against each other better. I think using flat grey tones instead of this style of hatching, or maybe switching to a thinner pen to hatch lines + not going too crazy with the hatching, might make this an easier read.

@magistelle: I praise the consistent line quality and your use of creating a tonally strong entry without relying on strong shading to mark lighting. Reading your entry wasn't a chore, as it was easily readable, that said it was too easy to read. Despite your consistency, the depiction of the action was uninteresting and amounted to little than a compilation of poses going from A hits B, B hits A, back and forth forever and ever. You even skipped the forever and ever part and went straight back into the main plot via "later", where originally they were robbing some unimportant character... more on this later @Your backgrounds were far more visually stimulating than Magistelle's in terms of detail, though your entry lacked the same consistency and commitment to illustration. Your dialogue was funner to read. Curiously enough however, the plot of your comic and Magistelle's are EXACTLY the same besides superficial details, and equally suffers the same A-to-B, back-and-forthingness. Remarkably you even included an unimportant 3rd character who serves the same purpose of breaking up the A-B monotony and resolving the encounter between the two characters. Overall-- Your plots were dreadfully similar the same sans superficial points and it seems to highlight the redundancies of your two characters on a level scaled on meta. Sure, both of you had minor differences that were enjoyable to read, but ultimately both these entries lacked the creative individuality that defines one's writing from another.

mags: good job! I have to agree with tinman on the bgs though. the setting looks very simple, and they're often in front of a brown gradient. your characters are clearly your strong point! aside from some minor anatomy issues, they look really sharp. you also did that weird three-panel thing to indicate a transition, which I've seen other voiders do a lot. I still don't really like it, but I dunno what I'd suggest in its place :I nice work though! gps: your inks need some work. it looks like you're maybe using one size pen for most things? that, coupled with the amount of hatching, leads to a lot of blending between characters and the background. try adding grey or something to help break up things. I appreciate that you went for a challenging shot at the bottom of page 3, but sadly I don't think it's working. it looked to me like he was just standing sideways, and it REALLY threw me off. the perspective on the shelves probably isn't right either.. it looks like the top shelves stick out much farther than the lower shelves. you need some anatomy practice as well, hands and heads/faces in particular. hope you can finish next time!

Magistelle: You can draw people very well now, i'm sure you know that yourself. So i guess from here you should branch out your other skills. People have been going on about backgrounds and stuff, and so will I. I think you just need to make it more 'believeable', and especially for Mammon, where he's constantly punching the wall, you should practice drawing walls that have been punched through. You'll notice that walls with cracks have pieces that fall out of it, or things that come out of it. When you punch the side of a wall, sometimes there might be a waterpipe or electic wires on the other hand. Also, the BIGGER the impact, the bigger the crack. The DEEPER the impact, the heavier the crack. You may want to look at youtube videos or google images on the physical characteristics of them. Also, another factor is that your shading is just so damn clean that it doesn't give the illusion of the alley being shoddy at all. You can decide how you wanna fix that up--either sacrifice a little of your clean shading and draw/color in texture, use a hard brush, etc, add computer texture, etc. GPS-Device: Wonderful drawing here, but sadly I see you didnt complete them all. I think you need to work on your decision of adding line width. The foreground should usually have the thickest lines, and the shadows seem to overpower the outlines of the drawing.When you only use black and white on a comic, you have to figure out ways to make certain lines pop in and out on each panel for it to make more sense and not look too jumbled. Shading was great on the first panel, but if you decide to shade like this, make sure every other panel has the same concentration and neatness as that panel (i mostly mean just that shelf where the bottle was at). Also, when you want to emphasize a specific thing on the panel more than the rest, you can give it a slightly thicker outline (the Cheep Vodka on panel 2, page 1), and as things recede from the viewer, the lines should be thinner, and you might want to add less details on them.

Mags- Firstly, let me say that I appreciate the fact you always take the time to make a really smashing cover that is both intriguing and informative. Not many take the time but its such a throwback to the paper tradition I was weaned on. Your fight choreography is great, effective speedlines and arcs of impact serve to add to the devastation, particularly the panel breaks on the fourth and fifth pages. Clearly you've studied up on the anatomy and fighting styles to make the moves and man meat feel real. Expressions and dialogue are conversational and vicious, the similarities between Mammon and Greg's personalities makes it easy to intertwine them in the back and forths. Your backgrounds are still your downfall, another drab alley and though you took some time to add dumpsters and refuse, there'es no texture or grit there. I realize you typically accomplish this with a stellar coloring job to fill the volumes but some brick hatchwork and properly ruled pipework and ladder lattice would have elevated the scene beyond the cardboard cutouts it feels like. The vibrations of the alley resonating with violence at the top nine was used to good effect however. As for the ending, didn't see it coming- what a twist! GPS- Now you know I love me some ink on paper work, and you do it well with tons of hatches and thick masses to add heft to your pages. You even utilize the three-fold black, gray, white values to perform separations in each panel. Still the ornately detailed liquor shelfing that you probably spent hours on would have been better served for other environmental details, still I dig your stipples and hashes on the ceiling panels and bottle work. Your pencils are pretty detailed and messy, you would do well to get some blue pencils so don't have to work so hard on them in the inking cleanup. What do you ink with? A sharpened stick? Get yourself some better pens than a sharpie and ease up on the heavy handedness, you can still be scratchy with your hairy chests and gritty brick work but controlling these so the finer details aren't lost in your black masses is the next step in your evolution. Dialogue is FANtastic- i laughed at the Invitational bit. Your framing is also suddenly cinematic with the great shot of Mammon flying over the counter, that's the stroke of genius and you nailed the perspective. The ending was similar to Mags, which is the sign of understanding each others characters and arriving at the most fitting conclusion, I loved the 80s mullet street fighting feel you do so well. Finally word- For a guy who draws musculy guys, you could afford to study the anatomy better, at least on the hands, those are easy. Maybe Gnomon workshops Finch videos on dynamic anatomy would help you out as much as it did for me. All around great fight you two, one I had been counting down the days to, cheers to your next bouts and the developments you make before we see them.

Done! Kinda... Its 6 AM, leave me alone

Finished my comic! :) I wasn't able to put 100% into it, but I made the best of it. Hope you folks like!

HYPE UP TO HERE

Yes yes yes. :>

Heres a sexy one!

HOT!!

BRUTALITY. FIGHT!

yes yes YES

It was only a matter of time...

OH YEAH. Looking forward to this, good luck, to both of you!

IT IS FUCKIN' ON LIKE DONKEY KONG

IT. IS. ON!