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Awesome Revenge
This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.
Uploaded March 26, 2011
Characters in this Comic

Comments (8)

Kuro's avatar
Kuro
All-Rounder
14 years ago
Great. Drawing Trademarked likenesses, you're going to get the site sued... It was ok. Your anatomy was all over the place. For instance, the panels where it's a real tight shot of awesome's face? First they make me think of the Prof Bros description of Anthony Hopkins. But then it really strikes me as though you drew in the features of the face, but then decided you wanted to fill the rest of the panel with just him, thereby giving him some sort of massive pumpkin head. Another point, the character in the wheelchair has like slender man arms happening. And even at times when you get it right, it's just sort of a figure, standing there or a dashing pose that doesn't really look like part of a run cycle. The poses don't really do much to help compositionally or to help build an emotion. First panel of page three, it looks like they're on the run & we should be concerned, but the character in the foreground's body language is all "Look at me Strut" Work on your body language, but also, as a guy drawing superheroes, take a look at the ol' How to draw comics the marvel way & look at what they say about adding dynamic angles & posing to your stories. Pacing was touched on. It was quick, but my problem seemed to be more about where the end came. When things actually started to happen, it suddenly cut to the "to be continued" & as a beyond battle, I would've preferred you getting us through more story upfront. Really though, my biggest problem with this was the settings. On the backgrounds you did draw, they didn't really feel too imaginative. Mostly just felt a series of line work or a really basic room template. If you really want the reader to become invested in Awesome's story, you really have to dress up the world around him to be more than a room with textured walls & a table in it. Make it a fully realized world. If something's supposed to be a secret lab, add some proper computers or at least some equipment. Instead of just a slab, why not have a med station in the lab, with equipment & gurneys off to the side. Before that, the room he busts into with the guys. It's this big empty grey room with a single picnic table in it. What was that supposed to be? A cafeteria? A rec room? Some kind of bizarre holding cell? You may have a better idea of what it was supposed to be, but you're not giving the reader enough context clues & really it just all ends up feeling pretty generic. It only takes just a bit more thought. What else would inhabit that room to give the reader an idea? And don't worry, that background doesn't have to inhabit, every panel if you don't want it to. But establish it.
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Evil Eye's avatar
Evil Eye
All-Rounder
14 years ago
You play with a lot of mythology intrinsic to your character in this comic, and that's very cool, but you need to slow down the pace so people can soak it up. Build atmosphere and all that. I found myself amused by what was going on, but it wouldn't establish itself very well, and would end too quickly. Just BAM BAM BAM BAM done. That's all I really have to say -- with either more time or more care I'm sure you'd have addressed this on your own, but it sticks out to me when I read it. You say the next part will flow better, so I'll be looking forward to that, for sure.
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Wolcik's avatar
Wolcik
All-Rounder
14 years ago
PyrasTerran: So Awesome is/was one of Estrella's proxies.... :O Death to be precise - that's why there are alternative looks (Sandman's and Marvel's). Carvaggio: I actually don't like how crappy I've drawn this, but since I already had those crappy lines... as for pacing I think that next part will have it flow much better ;)
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PyrasTerran's avatar
PyrasTerran
Writer
14 years ago
So Awesome is/was one of Estrella's proxies.... :O
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Caravaggio's avatar
Caravaggio
All-Rounder
14 years ago
It wouldn't be fair for me to say that I have absolutely no idea what's going on but I can still say the pacing is pretty breakneck. There are establishing shots here and there but something about it feels like actors just walking in to say their lines. I do appreciate the time taken to draw expressions in most of the frames, nice to have older characters that actually require some wrinkle work here and there. Also, I don't think the use of textures in the background is necessarily a bad thing, but they are kind of flat. Maybe a gentle gradient for lighting coupled with a power outlet or wall sconce here and there would break it up?
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Wolcik's avatar
Wolcik
All-Rounder
14 years ago
When posting I noticed that on 8th page I messed up background placement completly - screw lack of objects and flunctuation of room size, but there's no hole and there's no way that the door would be behind Awesome XD Anyway, there won't be a part two untill I catch up to school stuff and finish my other battle ;)
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Fearn's avatar
Fearn
All-Rounder
14 years ago
So when are you putting the next one up? I cannae waitttt!!!!!
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Wolcik's avatar
Wolcik
All-Rounder
14 years ago
Lines for this one were done for some months now, but untill I decided to make this a two parter I was waiting for other half of this one. It's strange but it's just the second time I tried textures for backgrounds - don't worry I know they are empty, and it's something I'm fixing in my next battle ;)
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