Generally thought this was pretty good. The line width/drawing size ratio is something you should consider for future battles. A few times here it seemed a little too chunky, but I think if you just practiced at it you'll get more proficient. Just find a size that works for you. Small number of panels per page means generally clear story telling which is very good, but if anything, I think you overused the splash a little too readily. Sure it's 14 pages, but how many splash pages? It's good for an effect but if you go to the well too many times, it loses its luster.

thanks for all the feedback guys i really appreciate it!

I really, really liked this and thought it was your best work so far... keep drawing man! You get better and better each fight. I hope you battle again soon and just stay active. The plot and the art and the overall "feel" of the comic (and last one too actually) we're just super well done and fleshed out. I really enjoyed Chia-Hui and Jaz in it too... we haven't quite got the 'Gang' off the ground, but it's a good ensamble and works really well! Good work, and keep it up.

Fern: - one solution to that is drawing your pages much bigger IRL than what it is meant to be ;) I am doing this for my first comic (The Pattern, it IS coming soon). I'm drawing on 11 x 17 paper and then after scanning shrinking it down to the 800 px width. it makes the detail seem much more impressive.

Penryn88: yes i totally agree with that, i like using a brush pen but i can be "heavy handed" at times. I'm glad you like it though. - one solution to that is drawing your pages much bigger IRL than what it is meant to be ;) But I actually loved the thick lines too. This was awesome btw. This was like the best comic I have read for a while, and I completely didn't expect this serious story as normally I find your comics quite light hearted (if this wasn't the case for a while now, blame it on my lack of presence here for a while). I don't actually have much to say, I am dying for the rest of the story!!

Small pages but big panels, that kinda bothers me because it doesn't seem like an actual "page" to me. Though I liked the thick lines, adds a lot of character to your drawings I think.

Penryn88, your story plot is one of the best i have read in a while...I wasn't expecting that! Also good use of Bhaav & Maansik, as well the others. Powerfull comic, man! BrainBaists, man i love Bhaav & Maansik, i was eager to see your side too...well, i know sometimes decisions are a pain in the @55 :/

I actually liked the thick lines in this one. This was definitely a different take on Baahv & Maansik's persona as it were~

[quote]My one comment about this is that you should work on your line weights. Everything was a bit to thick. yes i totally agree with that, i like using a brush pen but i can be "heavy handed" at times. I'm glad you like it though.

Penryn88, this was BALLIN'! I hope Dr. Ethos won't be too dissapointed when he learns that that books only chronicles Baahv & Maansik's doings on this level of the pattern... My one comment about this is that you should work on your line weights. Everything was a bit to thick.

uploaded

damn son

sadly i cannot do this comic...... my preparation for school has given me no time. it saddens me. i shall come back to this in the future.

Brain, you're always doing stuff, it's so cool. Can't wait to see what you're gonna do too, Penryn.

Brain, you're always doing stuff, it's so cool. Can't wait to see what you're gonna do too, Penryn.

with your last comic dr. ethos has become one of my favorite characters on the site with character development. I am very excited about this comic.

I'm excited to see how you write Ethos Brain, I'm gonna try some new stuff on this fight. Some things I've been meaning to do for a while now, i hope it works out.

Brain, stop being so industrious, you creative bastard.