The chess board and table change size/position in every panel; it's a problem on pg 3, top panel when it just gets really long, but then is comparatively small on the same page... I probably wouldn't have paid much attention to it if it weren't for that long panel at the top. I really just think being more consistent from panel to panel would really help you. Right now it seems like everything keeps its basic design each time, but the size radically changes, which is hella distracting and detracts from art that I otherwise like.
I also think that amazingdavid is right on the quality of your splash pages vs. the quality of your comic pages-- it makes me want to see like, a battle where every page is one panel done in a similar vein to your splashes. I didn't feel like the desaturation was really a problem though, as it didn't really detract from the quality (imo). The splash page's colors came out great too. The only possible complaint I would have with the colors is the bright purple/red of the chess table overpowering the characters a little, since it was the only really saturated color on those pages aside from the Scheduler's tie.
... Sorry for blabbing so much :T Overall I'm really looking forward to reading your stuff in the future bro, keep on keeping on.
So I really like the story and the character the art was okay, but felt a little...desaturated. Possibly it's a scanning problem or the tools you are using. I'm not sure, there is no reason traditional materials should be any less vibrant than digital. Perhaps you could tweak the levels in photoshop after you scan. Also you design splash pages very well. I don't think your paneled pages have the same control or whimsy that the splashes do. Perhaps there is a way to incorporate the less rigid structure of boxes into your paneled pages. I can't wait for what happens next in this.
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