ghoul: This was a cool scenario, I liked your story better.. but the rough lettering- and SO much text killed your entertainment. Also Backgrounds like has been said. The beach shot in the beginning didn't help too much, it seemed like they were in that all-white room in the matrix. I heard once that a good rule is to have at least one solid BG per page to keep your reader oriented to the place. Put some more thought into why the characters are at a particular locale and you might be more excited about drawing BGs. Some more setup for the random arrival of Kars and the zombie thing would have gone a long way for you too. Play around with some greyscale/black fill areas too so the art is more balanced and not mega white space mode. Phil: Man i'm really impressed with your improvement since you joined. Inks are looking better and better. Not a big fan of the grey hatchmarks..It looks cool but maybe is a bit overdone. Story was pretty good, but an explanation of the mirror in the end would have been nice. Like I get that ethos fools kars into thinking he's human again, but wheres the fuckin SCIENCE behind it?! 1 or 2 panels explaining the logistics would have been a lot cooler. Even something far-fetched it is fantasy after all. Your ending would have had more impact/ been funnier that way I think. overall though I was pretty impressed!

@everyone who said so: yes, I had some error in time management. That and I couldn't decide which story to pick (I had 2. because I'm indecisive that way). Yes Red, I see what you're saying there, next time will be better. Oh, and, nice twist at the end, Phil :)

could you go into detail Red?

tdk: You're still not doing backgrounds dude, and I know that was something you were told to work on. There was like 1 actual background in that whole thing, and there wasn't even characters in it. You were improving then took a step backwards... what happened? Pen: Your stuff is coming along nicely. I thought this was a good show, but I honestly think your last battle was a little stronger.

As far as talking head comics go i really enjoyed Penryn's. It was clear, paced well and you gave us what is missed in alot of comics i see on here, backgrounds. Without a sense of place, its hard to maintain any kind of readabilty and atmosphere. staring at characters on white background totally takes the reader out of the world your trying to create. tdkgunghoul somthing needs to happen in your comic. Consider your format, unless your working on an epic story arch, your almost wasting time devoting so many pages to straight dialog. A comic should be able to be read without any words at all. Those 6 pages you have could have probably been condensed down to 2.

Both were very creative in their own way, which I enjoyed. Welcome tdk, I dont know if it were the time constraint but bgrounds are a big deal, speaking from personal experience. The dialog was kind of excessive as well, once again coming from someone that has been told on an occasion or two. Pen, I like your approach, it was def left field but expressed both personalities well (according to what I've read).

I like tdk's writing; however overlong they got, and I like penryn's execution over all. tdk; work on your composition- your panels consist of paragraph long word bubbles and the tiniest mansketch on the biggest space alloted to you. Fill up ALL space in panels - or rather minimize the creation of Deadspace. Not negative space- Deadspace; the kind of empty space sorta feels like your crammed the tiniest thing in a big box. A lot of this could be attributed to your lack of backgrounds in bigger frames or use of flat camera angles. WHen you pencil, give your frames a doubletake and ask again how you can make the frame more interesting on camera angles and zoom alone. You're gonna have to minimize the text density too; if you want to make us read a lot then draw a lot more. No one ever thinks in paragraphs at any given moment; that kind of shit percolates. Anyways, your writing has neat voice to it which is a point of appeal if you cover your other bases you can use that alone as your vanguard for future works. C Penryn- I see very little problems with your piece which makes you the obvious winner. I read through it and found very little slowdown so on that alone I give you props. Your perspective could use a bit more work though they come off incorrect and stale in some parts. What I mean is, even if you have a 3/4ths perspective going on, your background elements still come out flat. So I would suggest studying situations in real life so that your lines be a little more informed, even if you are rushing your shit. Its not a major deficit on your part since your composition pretty much makes up for all of it - but I can definitely see this being a lot better than it is now. B+

uploaded! And now I sleep!

uploaded

good luck you two! :D

Curse you home+term break laziness!

Science vs Magic! No holds barred.

wheee! I am excited about this one, good luck on your first battle tdkgunghoul... what the hell does that name mean...

oh, cool :D Good luck you two!