MrPr - Sugar Sweet is a cute character, though maybe a bit much for me personally haha. I liked how you divided the panels on page 5 with her arms, I thought that was pretty clever. I think you could have pulled back the camera more often though. Gwen appears out of nowhere on the first page because there was no establishing shot showing the street and her approach. I’m also not sure what was actually going on with Paul? So is he a cat? A hat? What’s that about?
Gregly - Gosh this was so cute and creative! That first page with Sugar getting ready, and the way you utilised her powers? Loved it. Overall just fun and, well, sweet haha. The only crit I have is that I feel like you use a lot of panels per page, and to me that makes things feel cramped.
Mr Pr: I love how you conveyed Sugar Sweets powers. Page 5 is definitely a highlight playing around with the borders and using their body. However the story didn't really catch me in this. The beginning their interaction seemed forced. Mainly why would Sugar assume it was Gwen's cat when it was just a poster on the wall. But this was still a really cute comic.
Gwen: I really like the first page with Sugar Sweet geting ready in the morning was fun, lots of cute visual gags. The change in the relationship between Gwen and Regi is really interesting and want to see that explored more, it makes there dynamic much more interesting and it's underutilized in this comic. Also the lack of gutter space makes it feel a bit cluttered. But good job with the comic and I look forward to seeing how their relationship develops.
MrPr: Right from page one we see what kind of out there character Sugar Sweet is! I think that first panel could use some work, but the next two tell you all you need to know. Sugar Sweet really works best when her graphic cartooniness has a sense of form and shape. Sometimes her features are a little flat, or vague, but sometimes they're spot on she makes a great whole. That ending was bittersweet, with Gwen lying to not hurt the adult's (?) feelings.
Gregly: I love the candy makeup! You really had fun with your opponent! I guess you had to go with pencil lines, but it's too bad they couldn't be less scratchy. This comic's look, especially those fun transformations and the cartoony action, really would have gone well with something much sharper.
I second everything Fred said!
MrPr, I really loved seeing how creative you got with Sweet's powers! I would suggest you have someone proofread your comics, though, because some of the grammar sounds unnatural, assuming everyone in the comic is a native English-speaker.
Gregly, I love this character development with Gwen! She's had it hard for a while, poor thing. I look forward to seeing where this all takes her in the future!
Yall done very *sweet* comics ;D
But you did though. I went all UuU
I would like both of you to think about the space you use a bit more so it dont feel too cramped and flows better!
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