DIOV Tournament '23 Round One / Janitor X vs. Burmeister

DIOV Tournament '23 Round One — Janitor X vs. Burmeister

This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for Janitor X48.8%
296 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8Page 9Page 10Page 11Page 12Page 13Page 14

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
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This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for Burmeister51.2%
311 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
Yay cameos! Sorry some of them are a little out of character I didn't think to look at the bios until it was too late ;u;
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Critiques & Comments
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snager
Artist
415 comments
# 10   Posted: Mar 31 2023, 01:40 PM
Boogi: THAT'S A LOT of work and it's nice to see you around again! I like this version of egg dealer.
your story is kind of a flow of consciousness. if i called it sequential media, i might have to add the caveat that this is also outsider art as well. I like your dialog. "Gosh, my feelings hurt so bad." but this would have been a good spot to add a Cameo, such as Kubo who transforms at the sight of the cleaning solution , or Esp. Trapjaw as one of the cops? I would never tell you to add more establishing shots or text to describe or explain anything, that would obviously ruin the gestalt.
your animation adds some flavor to the end, but it's honestly more of a clipped together slide show than anything with natural looking movement, i'm sorry to say. but anyone would be pleased to receive one of these gifs, regardless! and your drawings of Burmy, though inconsistent, each show a different charm. bottom left page 3 with the gnarly arm and nice grip on the cigarette is my overall favorite.

Pizzaman: I think my favorite thing about your version of Janitor is his aversion to eggs. that makes sense. like his trauma manifested in the opposite way to OG Egg Dealer. very smart.
my second favorite thing is the way you draw Cedric's hands in the diner scenes. these scenes are also the most consistent to your experiment in trying to draw everything from his Perspective. I'm not sure how well you stuck to that goal though, when you keep trying to feed the audience who we're looking at all the time. it could have been a nice (though easy to guess) surprise at the end do finally reveal Cedric in portrait in that last panel.

Your ambition to draw cameos of all the other Diov characters is really sweet to everyone in the contest but also helps flesh out the world you're building. my favorite is def. the one of Trapjaw and his best friend, Evil!Kubo. your sketchy style is most explored in that one shot and lends itself well to the idea of a crunchy, lost town in the middle of nowhere. would be nice to see some of your backgrounds and establishing shots get a little more love in this way, too, or maybe to adopt some methods of photobashing. you could have made it look like an Homage to my favorite movie about someone with memory loss: Memento, and combined with Cedric's POV would have been a fun and artsy way to explore themes like The Self or dissociation. for anyone who wanted to dig that deep. esp. if you knew you were going up against the master outsider comic artist, boogidi, this would have been a good time to try out some new techniques.

I do love the way burmy flies in from nowhere and i'm sorry to say i hate Christmas music even DURING christmas, so I agree he's in the right, here.

GOOD LUCK TO YOU BOTH with your new DIOV characters and goodnight!
 

Pizza Man
Artist
77 comments
# 9   Posted: Mar 26 2023, 10:34 PM
Boogidi I didn't expect you to have my bugman move it looks so awesome and that pose on page 8 is fantastic! I also really like how you wrote Burmeister. His dynamic with Janitor was solid and he would definitely pick a fight with someone just for being strong and stinky :V I had fun with this one ty for the battle!

Bobert
Artist
244 comments
# 8   Posted: Mar 26 2023, 11:13 AM
Boogidi: Deranged amount of energy in this one!

Pizza: Nice comic, part of me wanted it to be a bit longer but on the other hand that would have messed with the story.

kubo
Artist
167 comments
# 7   Posted: Mar 22 2023, 12:21 PM
BoogidiBzdo - I love Janitor X's tattoos, very funny. The panel layouts on page two are a bit confusing but all in all it's a fun comic. I don't know if the gif ending was very necessary but it was still fun to see.

Pizza Man - I liked the narrative style of this comic, while the art is pretty sketchy, you managed to keep it all cohesive and engaging. Great job!


BoogidiBzdo
Artist
125 comments
# 6   Posted: Mar 21 2023, 09:07 PM
Pizza- Great storytelling! It was very funny, I loved it!
You did a great job - 2 thumbs up :)
This was very fun :D
And the action sequence at the end was well done.

IItherockmanII
Artist
180 comments
# 5   Posted: Mar 21 2023, 05:59 PM
boogi - love the energy and craziness of your style!

pizza - solid and fun expressions!

Solid entries!

Firefly
Artist
72 comments
# 4   Posted: Mar 21 2023, 03:01 PM
Boogi - This was fun and goofy and an impressive amount of work to squeeze into a single week! You even managed to throw in some animations! That's amazing! I do have to agree with Jelly and Des, that parts were hard to follow, I had to go back and reread some sections because I got a bit lost. Still you should be proud of what you've got done, the animations were nice and fluid and it was an enjoyable read!

Pizza - I like the direction you took your comic with it being told from an outsider's perspective instead of from your character's POV. It was a great way to immerse the reader in the setting and to set up the cameos (which were all wonderful to see. Foop's was hilarious. It's exactly where he belongs lol). I like how we're put in the middle of the conflict, and I have to say I agree with Burmy here.

SirJellyRaptor
Artist
105 comments
# 3   Posted: Mar 21 2023, 11:38 AM
Amongst all the Diov violence we have some  room for shenanigans.  

Pizza: the decision to make the main character neither of the characters involved in the battle was interesting, and I think it paid off. It really  helps accentuate the pure weirdness of both the involved characters by being caught in the middle of their bullshit instead of being an active part of it. Though if wanting to strangle a man for playing Christmas  music in July makes you a monster, then maybe I am a monster.

Boogi: this one got some legitimate laughs out of me. I do agree with Des that some of the action got a bit hard to follow and, adding to that, there's really  no sense of space here. I can't really  make out what the area around them looks like, what the layout is, where all the characters are in relation to each other. Like it seems that janitor and another man start the match in a cell but then suddenly  they're  not in the cell anymore for the rest of the comic to happen. But that's really  my only gripe about the comic, for the most part it's just some good old Boogi absurdism and a fun read

DesDemonical
Artist
45 comments
# 2   Posted: Mar 21 2023, 08:26 AM
Boogi- the energy and expressiveness of your art is so fun! Makes me think of Jesse McManus' comics. Some of the action was a bit hard to follow but I had a good time! Loved the end gifs :)

Pizza man- I'm glad you believe in giving the people who play Mariah Carey what they deserve. Loved the cameos- my favorite was Foop tied to a grill (I assume on front of a truck?) haha.
I really liked the first person perspective too!

Fluffsamasprime
Artist
567 comments
# 1   Posted: Mar 21 2023, 12:12 AM
truly the monster is the one playing christmas music any other time than december

Comic Details -

 
Tournament Match
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Mar 27th, 2023
Votes Cast: 16
Page Views: 756
Winner: Pizza Man
 

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