DIOV Tournament '23 Round One / Marie vs. TrapJaw

DIOV Tournament '23 Round One — Marie vs. TrapJaw

by Radji

This comic has been rated suitable for all ages by its creator(s)

Icon for Marie40.2%
184 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
Food poisoning isn't fun, here's the dialogue, hang with me, I'll post it soon once I recover.
tags:


This comic has been rated suitable for all ages by its creator(s)

Icon for TrapJaw59.8%
274 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8Page 9Page 10Page 11Page 12

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
unfortunately unfinished, but the story is all there this time. tried to prioritize the panels that I felt visual clarity was most necessary
tags: diov tournament, marie, trapjaw




Critiques & Comments
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snager
Artist
414 comments
# 8   Posted: Mar 30 2023, 12:51 PM
Radji: Your art style on page one is so gorgeous and it's really nice to see what art direction you were going for. the analog media is just so tactile and feels lived in, which draws us to the story and sets up the vibe. your corners and panels are so tidy and show such great craftsmanship. it's also neat to see your work flow and the way you plan out and write your comics. i'm SHOCKED you brainstorm in english? I can't imagine brainstorming in not-my-first-language? 8O Really wish we got to see more, but thanks for sharing what you have because the insight is v. valuable to us. on a personal note, I hope you can get your stomach checked out by a specialist maybe? I feel like this has happened a time or two before, could be srs.

Jelly: you shot for something really ambitious again, especially for a speed match. The finished art looks very nice. your digital pencils are not conveying as much data as your analog pencils usually do, so I'm interested to hear which you prefer for your workflow or which you think is faster. You went for a lot of world building here and I'm glad you'll get to carry that work over into the next round! I do hope you can find a method to budget your time well, because you clearly know how to draw really detailed and developed shapes with clear mass and depth and i'd like to see how your writing can fully carry through in that work!

Pizza Man
Artist
75 comments
# 7   Posted: Mar 26 2023, 09:58 PM
Radji: I'm mostly judging this comic on the first page but the dialogue on the other two pages does leave me interested in what you had in mind. The art on page one is clear and understandable even without dialogue. Hope you feel better soon.

Jelly: I think I like your depiction of Diov's frozen wasteland the most. You made Trapjaw a really interesting character to follow and while Marie does feel a little underwritten it didn't really bother me too much as she also works as a good first obstacle to showcase Trapjaw's abilities and motivations.

Bobert
Artist
239 comments
# 6   Posted: Mar 26 2023, 11:05 AM
Radji: My condolences again. Health issues interfering with the production of a comic or another artwork you are invested in is an irritating obstacle to contend with.

Jelly: Your comics are always nice to behold even in unfinished form.

Fluffsamasprime
Artist
567 comments
# 5   Posted: Mar 25 2023, 12:34 PM
Radji: Hope you're feeling better now. Glad you were still able to get what you had up. Hope to see the rest down the line.

SirJelly: The panels you got inked are so delicious! I wish I could have seen more inked, but  a week is a short amount of time to work on a comic. Hope to see more of Trapjaw, another very choice villain!

IItherockmanII
Artist
180 comments
# 4   Posted: Mar 21 2023, 05:31 PM
Radji - hope you feel better man!

SirJelly - the few inked panels were gorgeous

Firefly
Artist
72 comments
# 3   Posted: Mar 21 2023, 01:22 PM
Radji - I'm sorry the week did not treat you well, and I hope you feel better soon! I do hope you continue to work on this when you're feeling better and upload it as a beyond battle, because I'd love to see it as it's meant to be seen! Still, it is interesting see some behind the scenes of your comic making process!

Jelly - You made the right move prioritizing the text ad certain panels over others. The Panels you do have lined are really gorgeous, and your more sketchy panels still show clearly the actions! I really like the brief colors you've used to show Marie's magic too. Overall, you got a lot done for such a short drawing time! 12 pages was quite ambitious!

DesDemonical
Artist
45 comments
# 2   Posted: Mar 21 2023, 08:08 AM
For both of you, I really enjoyed the quality of the finished artwork. It's too bad neither was able to finish but life happens! I'd be excited to read the final products if either of you eventually finish :>
Radji, my main crit is actually that the pages were exported at a very large size! So it was hard to read- I had to zoom way out to be able to read them.
Sir Jelly, I felt overall even with mostly sketches the action was pretty easy to follow. i loved the panels of trapjaw biting down on Marie's arm!

SirJellyRaptor
Artist
105 comments
# 1   Posted: Mar 21 2023, 05:05 AM
Honestly I love your writing for Trapjaw, it is spot on and I look forward to when you can get the visuals finished

Comic Details -

 
Tournament Match
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Mar 27th, 2023
Votes Cast: 15
Page Views: 502
Winner: SirJellyRaptor
 

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