Pita asked for some writing feedback, so here's my two cents (and it's probably just time constraints so take it with a grain of salt!):
My biggest gripe is that giving Art and Millie a reason to meet feels rushed. You have one panel of Art being at an appointment with her and then another asking her out to lunch. I get that you wanted to explain how they would have run into each other in the first place, but I feel like those two panels had little to no emotional weight, and you could have invested that comic space into providing more emotional beats to the rest of the comic. I think your comic could have used a bit more of a smooth transition between Art asking if Millie is a threat to her anticipating him asking her to join the NDA. It felt kind of presumptive of Millie to expect him to ask that when his original goal seemed to be whether or not the NDA should be worried about her, even though she was correct. Maybe if Art had been a little less forthright about his motivations in asking Millie about her strength, he could have surprised her by asking her to join instead of saying the NDA might view her as a threat?
Something I really liked writing-wise, and I mentioned this in my original crit, but we're seeing a bit of Millie's motivation. She specifically doesn't want to use her strength to server others' causes, even if those causes might be good, and that gives us a promise that we'll learn more about what she DOES want to use her powers for. (Of course, REAL Millie fans will know she uses her powers to protect loved ones and punch creeps, but I still wanna learn more about her!) I want more Millie!!!
Faster Than Light Tournament, Final Round / Millie Might vs. Art Mishra
Critiques & Comments
# 11
Posted:
Jan 19 2022, 10:56 AM
# 10
Posted:
Jan 19 2022, 09:17 AM
Thank you for the comments! Some of the feedback here's given me a nice injection of confidence & keen to make comics.
I said above in my artist comment, but I'll say it again, I REALLY enjoyed this event. Could this be the year of 24-hour battles??
Pita- I loved your comic and I could totally see Art trying to recruit Millie in multiple different dimensions. I'll second Jade's comment about Millie's worldview and convictions, it's a side of her I didn't expect but very much enjoyed. There's a lot of intrigue there & I'm excited to see you expand on it.
I'm also completely obsessed with how you drew Art, he's so handsome but has just the right amount of softness. Perfect.
I said above in my artist comment, but I'll say it again, I REALLY enjoyed this event. Could this be the year of 24-hour battles??
Pita- I loved your comic and I could totally see Art trying to recruit Millie in multiple different dimensions. I'll second Jade's comment about Millie's worldview and convictions, it's a side of her I didn't expect but very much enjoyed. There's a lot of intrigue there & I'm excited to see you expand on it.
I'm also completely obsessed with how you drew Art, he's so handsome but has just the right amount of softness. Perfect.
# 9
Posted:
Jan 19 2022, 06:32 AM
Congratulations, Flytee!!!
# 8
Posted:
Jan 18 2022, 07:34 PM
Congrats on getting into the finals! Good luck both of you, awesome read from both sides.
# 7
Posted:
Jan 18 2022, 07:23 PM
Pita: I’m super impressed by how clean and finished this looks for the short deadline! Your entire tourney run has been really funny and I enjoyed it a lot, the last page on this comic gave me a legit laugh! the way you draw expressions and character acting is simply delightful.
Flytee: Again very impressive quality and quantity for one day of work! I love how you write dialogue, it feels very natural and it's just Fun. I’m really interested in where this plot thread of lifting the curse is gonna go and what the entity is going to do about it, it’s a great setup and I’m excited for it to be continued!
Flytee: Again very impressive quality and quantity for one day of work! I love how you write dialogue, it feels very natural and it's just Fun. I’m really interested in where this plot thread of lifting the curse is gonna go and what the entity is going to do about it, it’s a great setup and I’m excited for it to be continued!
# 6
Posted:
Jan 18 2022, 06:15 PM
Pita, I thought this was a great little comic and the ending made me laugh. I thought you did a great job through this whole thing.
Flytee, you were consistent through all the rounds with your story, and I was really impressed with the amount of comic you were able to produce. Your art is always adorable and charming.
Congrats to you both for amazing work!
Flytee, you were consistent through all the rounds with your story, and I was really impressed with the amount of comic you were able to produce. Your art is always adorable and charming.
Congrats to you both for amazing work!
# 4
Posted:
Jan 18 2022, 04:28 PM
Okay, finally voted and...
I'm not even sure I gave the right numbers (compared to how I felt about each one) but it's difficult to put hard numbers to a vibe. XD
Both of you have damn solid work on both. Its almost feels like a similar story between the two but on parallel worlds.
(which is amusing giving my own possible future plans)
No matter who gets the title, you both did incredible through out this whole event and should be very proud of yourselves!
I'm not even sure I gave the right numbers (compared to how I felt about each one) but it's difficult to put hard numbers to a vibe. XD
Both of you have damn solid work on both. Its almost feels like a similar story between the two but on parallel worlds.
(which is amusing giving my own possible future plans)
No matter who gets the title, you both did incredible through out this whole event and should be very proud of yourselves!
# 3
Posted:
Jan 17 2022, 08:22 AM
You guys did great!!! ☺️ Keep up the good work!
# 2
Posted:
Jan 17 2022, 01:54 AM
Half asleep, about to start work. Will give more thoughts and actually vote, but I did enjoy both of these.
Solid end to a bonkers style of tournament.
You both should be proud no matter the victor.
Solid end to a bonkers style of tournament.
You both should be proud no matter the victor.
# 1
Posted:
Jan 16 2022, 02:38 AM
*minis get popcorn and drinks for finale!*
Good luck to the both of you!
Good luck to the both of you!
Regular Match
Drawing Time:
24 hours
Ended:
Jan 18th, 2022
Votes Cast:
20
Page Views:
911
Winner:
Flytee
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Flytee: Oh dang if I didn't know any better, I would've assumed this was what you had planned all along. Your ability to incorporate these wildly different characters into a cohesive storyline is really impressive, tbh. I admit I would've liked to have seen Millie retain a few more of her more froggy traits, but I do still like the design you gave her! I don't know, man, I cannot think of any advice to improve on this.
To both of you: this was a real close one and you should both be proud of yourselves. I could certainly not pull off what you two did, and it's just. Mindblowing what you both have produced over the course of this tourney.