Faster Than Light Tournament, Round 1 / Millie Might vs. Brett Black

Faster Than Light Tournament, Round 1 — Millie Might vs. Brett Black

by Pita

This comic has been rated suitable for all ages by its creator(s)

Icon for Millie Might54.8%
334 points
Page 1

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
tags: 24 hour match, brett black, millie might


This comic has been rated suitable for all ages by its creator(s)

Icon for Brett Black45.2%
276 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
Man this was a battle but it is done right before midnight and right before the deadline!

I hope I did Millie justice and I hope everyone enjoys this entry into Brett's Dive into Void
tags: brett black, millie might




Critiques & Comments
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Platinumartist
Artist
141 comments
# 11   Posted: Jan 16 2022, 07:12 PM
Great Job on the Sunday Strip Pita, it looks of high quality. Now go on and win this whole thing so that way my loss doesn't seem so bad.

Now I'm just gonna lie down and start to question my life choices

Flytee
Artist
307 comments
# 10   Posted: Jan 14 2022, 08:19 AM
pita- short, sweet and very well executed! Millie is absolutely adorable & very unique design-wise! I'm excited to see more comics with her.

Plat- 3 inked pages in a day is a great showing! Good luck with your continued improvement! Being mindful that this is a 24-hour comic I have some thoughts that might help with pacing and time management. dm if it's not making sense.

Spoiler: ShowHide
 Something about the writing here really didn't gel with me. I had to read it a few times to pinpoint what it was, but I think I've worked it out.
So, Millie is the point of view character, she's the person who we see and hear from the most, but it's quite clear the main point of this comic is Brett and more specifically, delivering that bit of information on panel 1 page 3.
Because we don't really gain much intrigue or story from Millie's presence, making her the POV character feels a bit superfluous & like it's just happening because this is a void battle, not because it's the best choice for the story.
I guess the time saving comes in with you working out from the get-go the main purpose of a story, and then building everything around that. Cutting the fat is good, incorporating your opponent into the main point of the comic, in a way that isn't just "they're the fill-in for the audience" is also a lot more engaging.


Great round overall!


Fluffsamasprime
Artist
436 comments
# 9   Posted: Jan 12 2022, 07:22 PM
Heck yeah! Garfield style 3 panels!


Lady Jade
Council
1167 comments
# 8   Posted: Jan 12 2022, 10:07 AM
Pita: ShowHide
Short and sweet! Cute joke, simple punchline, beautifully drawn anthros as always!

Platinum: ShowHide
I know the backstory about how you drew this comic, and I'm still super impressed at how you were able to sketch while in a moving vehicle! And 3 pages in a day definitely nothing to sneeze at. You accomplished your goal of introducing Brett as a man who will fight for what's right at the risk of his own health and safety, and who can't stay in one place for long. I think there's a bit of telling instead of showing here, since the actual action he took happened off screen, but I think you said in VC that that was just cut for time, so I can't fault you on that. But maybe you could have cut something else and just thrown in something before where your current comic starts to show him standing off against those villains despite being grievously wounded. Maybe show his pure grit and determination scaring off the thugs who thought they could just beat the shit out of him. Anyways, that's just food for thought. This is a 24-hour comic, and sometimes you just have to tell your story and not worry too much about exactly how you're going to tell it. Looking forward to see how Brett's story unfolds in the future! 😊

Strawberry Pepper
Artist
23 comments
# 7   Posted: Jan 12 2022, 09:15 AM
Theses were short, sweet and silly. Really honestly feels like the theme of this event: Being cute and silly. I don't think it was intentional, but it feels like where most of us landed.

Pita: Short, sweet, complete-ish. I do love that it could easily be continued into a proper chase comic, but it doesn't feel strongly that it needed to be. Like, the joke itself of a grab and run is snappy and total. Your colors pop well too. A solid piece for the time we had.

Plat: your work is fairly solid. I would normally say this feels rushed... but then we were. XD I think the weakest part here was it feels more like a set up to a larger story then a complete scene, like there was something more here that could have been done. Not sure what per se. Maybe because you touched on both characters, but it felt like only half the story of each was told. Like, yeah Brett is trying to be a vigilanty hero, but the details are thin in a way that calls attention to it rather then just being a quick bit of info to bolster the rest. Similarly, Millie's concern about 'more crazies' feels like there could have been something more to it, like a specific name dropped or something. I mean, yeah this is void, but internal to the comic itself, it felt like a line that needed a bit more to support it? Or something...

Its hard to pin down, cause I don't think you did anything wrong, and I can only imagine how much more detailed this scene would have been with more time. But I kinda feel like that is the point, finding what you can pull off in the time you got to the best of your ability. Quality wise, I feel you did pretty dece as many of us did, but compared to your opponent, the story felt thinner despite, or perhaps because more conceptually was going on.

Still, bottom line from both of you is that you did an amazing job and I look forward to what comes next X3

IItherockmanII
Artist
66 comments
# 6   Posted: Jan 12 2022, 08:34 AM
Good battle both of you.

Heavenbat
Artist
227 comments
# 5   Posted: Jan 11 2022, 10:00 PM
Apparently Brett refuses to spend more than ten minutes in a hospital XDD

Pita: Really gotta appreciate keeping it short, solid, and to the point given the time restraint! You managed to pull off a completed little strip in an excellent use of your time, and the end result is Very Funny XD kudos!

Plat: I actually disagree with Cab, I don't think your backgrounds really needed much extra except maybe a quick dash of gray on the walls or something to make the characters pop a bit more. To me, I feel like adding too much more detail in the lineart stage would have just added too much visual "noise" and would have taken away time to focus on other things. Some of the word bubbles could use a little tweaking to tighten them up a bit, but this is a pretty solid story for a 24 hour comic! And a good setup for Brett's future comics :3

Cab
Artist
140 comments
# 4   Posted: Jan 11 2022, 11:52 AM
Pita: solid short and fun comic strip worthy of any Sunday newspaper, amazing you were able to color it too, good stuff all around.

Plat': kudos for trying this crazy ftl 24 hr comic event, I can tell you had fun, with that perhaps next time you keep it simpler maybe a 1-2 pager and fill up the background a bit more, there was a few panels of too much white space and there's some word balloons issues to resolve. Still a good effort and I want to see more Brett black tales in the months to come.

Animeshen
Artist
1449 comments
# 3   Posted: Jan 11 2022, 10:08 AM
Pita: PPFFT a short and simple gag, very well done XD
Plat: I like how heroic you made Millie look when she picked Brett up. Hes a bit dramatic, isnt he? XD great work on the inks!

Red
Council
698 comments
# 2   Posted: Jan 11 2022, 09:59 AM
Pita - This is the very definition of short & sweet! Pretty smart move to do a 3-panel comic so you had time to make it shiny.

Plat - I'm impressed that you were able to do 3 pages, and it looks really clean. I might have done some more areas of solid black just to make it feel a little more polished and complete without color. But I think you did a great job especially with this timeframe!

Strawberry Pepper
Artist
23 comments
# 1   Posted: Jan 10 2022, 03:32 AM
*minis wave teeny flags and foam hands, cheering for art frens*

Good luck!

Comic Details -

 
Drawing Time: 24 hours
Ended: Jan 12th, 2022
Votes Cast: 16
Page Views: 470
Winner: Pita
 

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