Intro Story / The Heir to the Universe

Intro Story / The Heir to the Universe

Intro Story — The Heir to the Universe

by Camel

This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for The Heir to the Universe
74%
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4

Crit level: No preference
tags: the heir to the universe




Critiques & Comments
Please register or log in to comment


ArtsandGoodies
Community Manager
553 comments
# 10   Posted: May 1 2021, 09:06 PM
This is a great concept for a character and I love the style you did with this, though for future ones it may help to be a little more careful with your colors as they do seem to break lines a but more than would be intended

Hellis
Artist
280 comments
# 9   Posted: May 1 2021, 05:37 AM
I have zero issues with the text. But thats becouse it is  a old school approach favored by many of my favorite eurocomics. I absolutely adore it. The entire thing made me feel like I was blasted back in time to the 80's.

snager
Artist
120 comments
# 8   Posted: Apr 29 2021, 10:39 AM
Oh yeah, I wanna kick his ass, for sure. and draw that candycane cape. this dude looks so fun, can't wait to see where this is going!

Flytee
Artist
237 comments
# 7   Posted: Apr 29 2021, 03:53 AM
Daaamn amazing job Camel I enjoyed the hell out of this.

call me crazy but I loved the block of text at the start of the comic, it got me pumped for the visuals that followed & it was beautifully written.
I will say I understand crits that it isn't exactly accessible, I guess whether or not you continue with this style of writing depends on how bothered you are about that. I personally think it works for the grand, sci-fi opera vibe you've got going on.
In terms of the visuals, I dug them, the bright colours, patterns, gore, and sharp geometric shapes created a really unusual result, in a good way! It's like Moebius art & Utena had a baby.
The character himself is promising- so far he's dangerous and imposing and maybe a little bombastic (based on the cape at least)- you haven't gone in-depth with him, but you'd told me enough to lure me into his story & world, which makes for a great intro!

Crit wise I have some small quibbles- The inks should've been crisper and cleaner. On some smaller panels, I could see little white spots around the line art.
On the final panel as well, the pattern on the background windows overlapped with that pillar a lot. I call these things "quibbles" because I don't think many people will notice them without studying the pages closely, just something to keep in mind.
I also wish the title on the final page was Bolder and brighter, it looked surprisingly subdued up against the stripes, I don't think that was intentional?

These minor things aside, I adore this comic and I'm very excited to see you experiment more.


Petrichor
Artist
54 comments
# 6   Posted: Apr 28 2021, 10:32 AM
I immediately added him to my hitlist after reading this intro because i have no self control.
And can i just say that i LOVE his cape and overall color pallet? i don't care if his design is really complex, it is all very appealing to me and i love it.
I must say however that the huge text at the beginning was so hard to read i gave up reading it at some parts... maybe try using a different font next time.

TheCydork
Artist
491 comments
# 5   Posted: Apr 28 2021, 03:40 AM
This was an interesting concept, and I didn’t mind the big chunk of text on the first page. Really cool font, though a little hard to read, especially liked the big fancy first letter as t brought to mind old manuscripts. The last page is also super cool, love the design on the upper half of the page and how the Heir’s cape flows down to the title. Not sure about the rest of the comic though. I think with a style so stark and geometric, you really have to be perfect, but I could often see spots that hadn’t been fully coloured in or lines that hadn’t been erased properly. Panels often felt flat, characters having shadows in one and none the next, with barely any shadows in the environment itself either (this is clearest on page 2). The Heir’s design is also quite busy, with stripes going in all different directions and being different, but equally bright colours. There isn’t really a place for the eyes to rest while looking at him. Since his cape seems to be the centrepiece, I’d advise reducing the stripes on his actual body/armour and making their colours more muted, so he’s a clear silhouette against the bright, patterned cape. Something similar to what you did with the title at the end.

At the end of the day it’s awesome to see experimental stuff, I get how scary that can be so good on you!

Sunrise
Artist
16 comments
# 4   Posted: Apr 25 2021, 04:24 AM
God I love retro futurism heavy metal. I'm biased and I don't care. I can't wait to see what you do with this guy. While I could read the text at the start I was having to squint at parts and at times slow down my reading so I was sure of what I was reading. That's the only complaint I got. Great stuff, man.

Footini
Artist
235 comments
# 3   Posted: Apr 24 2021, 06:31 PM
Oooh this is juicy!
This is one of those intros that perfectly gets me hyped to see a character in action.
I want to have ultraviolent philosiphical sword fights with Heir now, with comics.

That cape tho.
I like a challenge.

Camel
Artist
131 comments
# 2   Posted: Apr 24 2021, 04:13 PM
This comic took me quite a while and is about as experimental as I've gotten on Void so far - whether it's a failed experiment or not, we'll see.

Spirogs
Artist
23 comments
# 1   Posted: Apr 24 2021, 02:30 PM
All 4 pages huh? Nice.
Great showing from this character on fighting prowess, as common chains and men just can barely even exist before him. The idea that he is both extremely fast, and strong are very clear.

The HUGE text block at the start was a bit of a chore though... Thats a lot of unguided reading for a comic.
Personally would have gotten the gist of the character from everything after that just fine.

Great use of colors. I love that cape.
I'd also hate having to draw it myself haha! It would certainly have an opponent on their toes.

Comic Details -

 
Ended: May 1st, 2021
Votes Cast: 19
Page Views: 264
 

Add to Playlist -

 
 

Newest Comments -


Newest Characters -

 
OleanderAda DimitrDr. RasmussonThe Heir to the UniverseCornelious HuskBrittany MarshalAlekiLaqwen & ArgosLucas LeDeuxStein Neumann (Skunk)Asteria Hyde
 

Open Challenges -

 
No open challenges
Create a new challenge
 

Random Comic -



Latest Topics -

 
Art of Rivana 
Last updated: Rivana - Today at 07:28 AM
All News, All The Time 
Last updated: Staff Bot - Today at 03:04 AM
EXTINCTION EVENT 
Last updated: Red - May 03, 2021, 07:14 AM
Double Scar Match Character Reaction Jam  
Last updated: Shen - May 02, 2021, 11:15 PM
Dungeon Master of Disaster 2021 
Last updated: Don - May 02, 2021, 03:27 PM
 

Latest Members -


Users online -

 
80 Guests, 2 Users


[]

Most Online Today: 135.
Most Online Ever: 1,184 (Jan 13, 2020, 06:21 PM)

 

Original site Copyright 2002-2017 Kevin Birtcher All characters and content Copyright 2002-2017 their respective owners Theme by SMFTricks - Modified by Brittney Scott & Jordan Bobo
Website Security Test