Last Ants of a Dead Colony / Sable

Last Ants of a Dead Colony / Sable

Last Ants of a Dead Colony — Sable

This comic has been rated suitable for teens and up by its creator(s)

Icon for Sable
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8

Crit level: No preference
Story: PyrasTerran & Rivana
Script: PyrasTerran
Pencils/Layouts/Inks: PyrasTerran
Coloring/Rendering: Rivana
Lettering/SFX: PyrasTerran

Review help: Kozispoon & Don
Special Thanks: Lovechild Death Tournament teams for Todd & Strigoi
tags: death, lovechild, Round 1, sable, Strigoi, Todd, tournament

Critiques & Comments
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# 8   Posted: Apr 20 2021, 10:39 AM
Thank you everyone for the comments and votes <3

Sable's next adventure will be against Llaana so stay tuned :)

# 7   Posted: Apr 19 2021, 08:08 PM
Like Flytee, I thought Sable was gonna be a fairly serious character, and I was surprised by how she acted here. It’s kind of endearing and separates her a little more from her “parents”, I like it. The comic is pretty solid so anything I have to say is just disconnected thoughts so I’ll just list em haha:

> The worms dropping out of Strigoi’s eyes and mouth was really unnerving, the closeup of her eye especially made me wince. I didn’t really feel any tension as she approached Sable though, I think because of the restrictive grid panelling.

> Nice overhead shot on page 3 to clearly show how the other agent missed Wallace’s body.

> Panelling on page 4 confused me as well, but Kubo already explained why.

Also thanks for including our boy in the story! I wanna know who took the phone now.

# 6   Posted: Apr 18 2021, 04:16 PM
You two are a well-oiled collaboration machine, the art here is consistently fantastic, and it's all framed very nicely. The inverted tails do get dangerously close to the text though, but that's a minor squabble. Good stuff!

Community Manager
# 5   Posted: Apr 17 2021, 09:11 PM
I love the bottom of page 5, that was a fantastic reveal and panel. you two are doing great work together.

# 4   Posted: Apr 17 2021, 03:12 PM
Another banger, great job guys.
Stunning artwork & a great insight into Sable's personality. She came across as fairly stoic in her intro so I was pleasantly surprised by her awkward, dorkiness here. I love this direction it humanises her a ton.

# 3   Posted: Apr 13 2021, 09:57 PM
This is a very pretty comic.
Also the personalities of Par and Sable are so fun, and they play off each other in such a delightful way. Very fun read

# 2   Posted: Apr 13 2021, 09:10 PM
This is ridiculously gorgeous. I can't even BEGIN to critique it, Im just not qualified lol. I love how awkward Sable is talking to people, shes adorable. Excellent art, looking forward to more!

# 1   Posted: Apr 13 2021, 08:37 PM
This comic is top notch. Great job, both of you. I like the nine panel layout you went with here, its fun and clean and adds a uniformity to the entire comic. Your panels are nice and diverse on each page, not too many floating heads of the same size or redundant camera angles. My personal rule is to always have at least one shot per pages of a characters feet and you too keep to that really well. I do enjoy the overall pacing, I love the expression beats (like on page four) and the intro on page 1. The coloring is phenom, especially that last panel on page 5.

I only have two critics to throw at you. The first is on page 4 (I already brought this up to Py) The layout for the first 5 panels is a bit funky. Traditionally with this layout you would read the four smaller panels before reading the tall panel last. I think making sure all the dialogue was aligned with the first two panels was a good way to make sure the flow followed into that tall panel. Its a great panel and I'm glad you didn't cut it in half.

My second critique is with the lettering. A lot of your bubbles feel a little suffocated, especially the ones where the tails are inverted. As this is a big problem in my own comics I understand the frustration and can't give anymore advice on this except keep this in mind when laying out the pages and always keep an "E" height of distance between the text and the outline of the balloon.

Both of these are pretty small things and really do not detour from my overall enjoyment of the comic. Like I said, great job, you two and I am excited to see where this story leads to.

Comic Details -

Drawing Time: 2 weeks
Ended: Apr 19th, 2021
Votes Cast: 22
Page Views: 829

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