VCV: Popular Monster / Raven

VCV: Popular Monster / Raven

VCV: Popular Monster — Raven

by Rivana

Icon for Raven
73%
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
tags: raven, vcv, void city valkyries




Critiques & Comments
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Flytee
Artist
167 comments
# 17   Posted: Oct 31 2020, 02:17 AM
ahh great job Riv, this was a good slice of character development for Raven. It was really interesting seeing her show this level of post-kill remorse, it felt like an important character beat.
I also love the fame angle you've started here- its sucha good direction to go in after the vcv comic, Raven has some famous friends now and I love that you've written some consequences to this.

It's been cool seeing you adjust your painterly style into something less punishing for comics, I think it works more and more with each comic I see from you! You've got some handy crits bellow so I'll just leave it there, great job!

Bonus random artist suggestion.
Spoiler: show
 In case you haven't already heard of him, I think you'd like the comic-artist Stjepan Šejić. He's a good example of someone with a heavily rendered, realistic style, who I think, is excellent at simplifying it when he works on comics. I think he could be some great inspo for you!

 

Rivana
Artist
214 comments
# 16   Posted: Oct 27 2020, 07:28 AM
Thanks for the comments so far! Really learning so much good pointers already and I super appreciate it. I normally do my thank you post at the end  but I just want  to address one thing that Cy said

Also, this isn’t really a crit, just something I noticed and personally found weird... The scene on page 1. We’ve got Kubo and Miller chatting, and then kids dressed up as Xia and Wizzie for Halloween. It’s really weird to see characters, or likenesses of characters, who’ve all been significantly involved in a Arma just hanging out in the same space by coincidence.
Quote

The choices of characters for this scene is not as insignificant as it seem actually. This is a chunk of text so I am spoilering it but if anyone is curious about how I picked these cameos and what they symbolized. Read on:

Spoiler: show

Kubo and Miller hanging out is used to establish something in future plots (I also specifically contacted Kubo and Py if those two characters are going to continue to communicate after Arma) and the children dressed up as 3 of the Valkyries (I wanted to put 5 kids but I ran out of space) is there to show the accidental popularity the Valkyries got after the Arma Collab comic.

The kids recognizing Kubo and Miller as Defenders in the lower left panel also implied that the Defenders themselves are somewhat recognized for their heroics (in my headcanon at least). All in all, the page is used to show of how these characters are perceived as heroes at the moment and are relatively well known. I need to establish this for Page 6.

Fast forward to page 6, we see someone who perceives them as otherwise. That to some (or this man in particular), most metas are all threats regardless of the side they chose.

Since we're discussing my thought process in these cameos: Raven used Cynthia as a disguise not only because Cynthia is a public figure/journalist and Raven would've seen her somewhere but this comic is also a shoutout to an RP scene I had with Footini in the past. That RP featured Cynthia, Ran (the man in the park. his name is not significant rn in Void comics tho) and Triceracop (you see him at the end lol). Footini is also celebrating his bday soon so I thought he'd get a kick out of it.

Rensga is also the name of the pizza place where Guts and Rae/Blue work

"Eld" in page 1  was supposed to say "Elder Apothecary" though I am aware that the approximate location may not  be accurate in the previous comics I've seen it. It could be the backdoor at least lol


All in all, I do not intend for anyone to recognize those ideas in my head when I picked those scenes/cameos but yes I have my own reasons for them. I like putting elements in my story that I feel like I can revert back to or enjoy the symbolism of even though I am the only one who understood them. :)

You’ve populated your other comics with big names before - Remy, Kubo and Swan among others have repeatedly shown up or been mentioned in the background. But there are more people than those in Void. The city feels oddly small when you often cameo the same people, or cameo people who’ve been in previous comics of yours but don’t have a part in this one (like Miller and the kids dressed as Valkyries). Don’t be afraid to make NPCs like you did here with Luca! Making up random designs is hard, but in the longrun it’ll help make the world feel bigger and more lived in.
Quote


I can explain to you my thought process in these past cameos too since I already started it:

Spoiler: show

I put Remy and Swan in my intro comic because I was so impressed with the Bloody Valentine comic - which I just read at the time.

Kubo and Remy arguing in Sandbox (Vampire and Vektran Walk Into A Bar) were chosen because I know their personalities are going to clash and Kozispoon helped me and Pyras a ton in that script so I definitely wanted to put Remy there. Ash, Jaja and Crikey were in the BG cos I love these characters. The cameos here (including Kubo, Remy themselves) were also a nod to some of my faves during the arma sign ups which was happening at the time.

Also in Homeward Bound, I had more cameos than those you mentioned. Juniper, Iain, Click Lyric (I just love Click), etc. Most of them were featured due to their participation in the Sandbox RP that originally inspired this comic - Inky's Ozias and Deji's Buck were there since the 3 of us started that server. Iain, Juniper and Swan were in the original Sandbox RP at the time. Miller was there as a hint that he's back and has access to the Sandbox (as you've all already seen) so he was put there for a reason with Pyras' permission before Miller's return comic went up. Cab's Roxy was added because I wanted to return the favor to Cab for featuring Raven cameo in his comics. He chose Roxy in particular and honestly, I was so moved by her death in the tourney so I really wanted to put her there anyway ;_;


All in all, anyone can put whatever cameos they wish in their comic (naturally people will pick characters and personalities that had the most impact to them at the time) and I certainly am not afraid to put more varied cameos/npcs in the future. It's just for me, I tend to give reasons to them in my head even though I am the only one who understood them. It makes it feel more personal to me. And as I have already shown, I also use them as story telling tool  for current and future comics (sometimes the type that ppl may miss and that is okay. It's just bonus points for ppl who would put the puzzle pieces together later on - ie an Easter Egg)

Of course if I had the space (and time lol) and the scene demands it, I'd gladly put more random characters in the scene.

Footini
Artist
95 comments
# 15   Posted: Oct 27 2020, 02:01 AM
@elyan

I read this over several times and never noticed that Raven was disguised as Doc Sic.
I just did not pick up on that.

TheCydork
Artist
339 comments
# 14   Posted: Oct 27 2020, 01:01 AM
OKAY comment has been updated!

Elyan
Artist
115 comments
# 13   Posted: Oct 27 2020, 12:46 AM
holy hell. this is pretty well done! Its packed with detailand lots of cameos and original showups. i really like the actual vibe you set here for the world/voidcity. The detail though is maybe even a little too much. I was pretty distracted often trying to see what you packed in there. but at the same time i wasnt paying too much attention to what was actually happening so i only realized in a reread Raven was camouflaging as Doc-Sic and lost her illusion in page transition.
Artwise this is all very beautfil. So layout and panel composition and usage of props and detail to help the readers eye direction is probably something work working on more.
other than that i see very cool and beautiful scenes resulting in a entertaining read!

TheCydork
Artist
339 comments
# 12   Posted: Oct 27 2020, 12:17 AM
I agree with Putrid, your covers always look great! It’s also really cool to see a follow up of the Arma collab so soon afterwards. The streets have a nice gritty feel to them that definitely suits the post-Arma vibe, but it was nice to see the kids trick-or-treating too, like Void is just going on as usual after the chaos.

I feel like you haven’t quite decided whether you’re going to stick to your illustration style or lean more into this looser style. I see elements of both in this comic in a somewhat clashing way. The problem is most obvious to me on page 5: you have this beautifully rendered closeup of Raven’s face in the third panel, and then these rather cartoonish, thickly lined fingers next to her that lack the same kind of rendering. The bird below suffers a similar treatment. Speaking of birds, if this new character you’re introducing works with them a lot, you might want to practice them more. The birds here look kind of formless and the anatomy is pretty off. On page 5 again, its head looks completely twisted. It might be helpful to pick a specific species or at least group to study. For instance, even within birds of prey, eagles look very different to falcons. With their short beaks and small size, I would guess these birds are more inspired by falcons or kites. Both of these birds have different wing and tail shapes though, so it’s worth having a look at both to see which fits the vibe more.

Also, this isn’t really a crit, just something I noticed and personally found weird... The scene on page 1. We’ve got Kubo and Miller chatting, and then kids dressed up as Xia and Wizzie for Halloween. It’s really weird to see characters, or likenesses of characters, who’ve all been significantly involved in a Arma just hanging out in the same space by coincidence. You’ve populated your other comics with big names before - Remy, Kubo and Swan among others have repeatedly shown up or been mentioned in the background. But there are more people than those in Void. The city feels oddly small when you often cameo the same people, or cameo people who’ve been in previous comics of yours but don’t have a part in this one (like Miller and the kids dressed as Valkyries). Don’t be afraid to make NPCs like you did here with Luca! Making up random designs is hard, but in the longrun it’ll help make the world feel bigger and more lived in.

Footini
Artist
95 comments
# 11   Posted: Oct 26 2020, 07:51 PM
Waffle best new Void character 2020!!!  #Waffle4life

I can see you're getting better at expressions and the acting of  your characters.  One of your strengths with your figures is the face. Though some of the other parts of the bodies need some work; mostly with forshortening and the hands.  Your hands are for the most part the right shape but when the fingers bend they look off slightly bent wrong somewhat.  Some of the linework looks a little messy at the start (pg. 4 looks a bit rough) but it gets cleaner as you go.  It looks like you're going with a different style of art with your last few comics but I think when you were doing the Rocio and Jerin battle your art looked it's best.  I'd say maybe go with thinner, cleaner, lines maybe and work with your style of shading you have now.  The way you do lighting works well and I like this backgrounds that are more painterly looking what with big silhouettes with some details and textures added in.  It's a good less is more look that gives the city a noir like gritty feel.  I'd think that giving yourself more time to really polish this style before going with shorter deadlines to rush through would help with the look.

Your visual storytelling is getting strong.  You work well with just showing what's going on with little dialogue.  The shot compositions and blocking are strong enough you might be able to have gotten away with less dialogue altogether.  
On that note your speech is getting better at sounding more natural though Raven still as extra as ever.

Overall i'd say that this comic shows a lot of growth for you as a storyteller and an interesting developing art style for your comics just the before and after of VCV shows you've learned a lot in the past year.
You're on your way to being a top comic artist and writer.

#Wafflethebest

Hellis
Artist
260 comments
# 10   Posted: Oct 26 2020, 01:04 PM
I am a biiiig fan of that last page. The dialogue of it flows really well and honestly, the writing overall is the comics strong part.

Artwise, I did not expect such a loose approach to the inks and a lot of the lightweight felt lacking, and the sketchiness of it made certain parts suffer. I think your facial expressions and overall body language is improving, but I certainly see a bit of stiffness and awkward foreshortening when your characters do more dramatic gestures. Paneling and flow and the angles were strong. You do a good job at making each panel move into the next and I could always feel the scenes "Moving" as it were. V.good job there.

I look forward to more!

Pocketmouse
Artist
101 comments
# 9   Posted: Oct 26 2020, 12:03 PM
Wow! What a gorgeous comic! This is a really tidy, intriguing continuation for Raven. I hope Crikey helps her!!

One little consideration you could take on for next time is to think about panel layout with the speech bubbles as a part of the composition. Sometimes they overlap characters and other important art elements. While this can be an effective tool from time to time, a nice clearance between your characters and the bubbles can give a stronger experience of the art for your reader. I want to see as much of your lovely drawings as possible! :) it didn't take away any enjoyment of this comic for me, but I hope you find it a helpful idea for future.

Can't wait for your next installation - I'm so invested in your characters arc! :D

Rikun
Artist
103 comments
# 8   Posted: Oct 24 2020, 09:41 PM
It looks like you've been improving on your backgrounds and have been experimenting with textures, and to that I say good job! As always your anatomy is great and your expressions are improving, but I do feel like they could be pushed a bit more.

It also appears you were leaning heavily into the "Monster" part and less on the "Popular" part. I'm intrigued to see how much the demon blood is going to affect how Raven acts from this point on but I'm a bit unclear about where you're going with the VCPD on her tail.

Overall I'm glad to see more Raven and I'm hoping to see more development in the future.

PutridVodka
Artist
60 comments
# 7   Posted: Oct 24 2020, 08:40 PM
I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START. The cover is so classy and GOOD!
Love how texturized everything looks, and the harsh shadows in the background look very nice! Really liked the panel where Luca snapped his fingers when recalling the Valkyries. Poor guy, I felt really bad for him. BUT!!
Seeing Raven be super scary was SUCH A DELIGHT! the shots of the bird flying through the whole comic and then going back to their master were really sweet too
Loved the ending! I'm on the edge of my seat, can't wait to see what happens next!
hehehehehtriceracophehehhehe

InvaderDiz
Artist
24 comments
# 6   Posted: Oct 24 2020, 05:41 PM
Don’t have much to say but impressive.

Rivana
Artist
214 comments
# 5   Posted: Oct 24 2020, 01:34 PM
Submitted. Got hit by an art rut at the beginning of this but thankfully got over it and finished in time. I tried all sorts of new stuff here, I hope it doesn't look too bad and you guys like it anyhow :)

Rikun
Artist
103 comments
# 4   Posted: Oct 15 2020, 08:06 PM
Super hyped to see how this turns out!!!

Footini
Artist
95 comments
# 3   Posted: Oct 10 2020, 06:41 PM
:weehoocatemoji:

But for real though can't wait to see all these VCV stories coming out.

PutridVodka
Artist
60 comments
# 2   Posted: Oct 10 2020, 01:05 PM
YEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!!

JCee
Artist
385 comments
# 1   Posted: Oct 10 2020, 09:17 AM
Consider me HYPED!

Comic Details -

 
Drawing Time: 2 weeks
Ended: Oct 31st, 2020
Votes Cast: 23
Page Views: 640
 

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