Kazue L. Burns vs. Kubo

Kazue L. Burns vs. Kubo

Kazue L. Burns vs. Kubo

by Energy

This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for Kazue L. Burns37.2%
284 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques

by kubo

This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for Kubo62.8%
480 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8Page 9Page 10Page 11Page 12Page 13

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
tags: kazue l. burns, luz, the burbs

Critiques & Comments
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# 13   Posted: Aug 5 2020, 08:24 PM
WOW, Kubo! This is the first time i've seen your  work and it was such a nice introduction! I like the way you two have elected to weave your characters' back stories together.

and Kubo, I appreciate the way you worked that furry character in in your style. and all the world-building you gave me. I was genuinely spooked when the little girl turned around, too.

Energy, you got some BALLS going up against one of Void's biggest dudes, and I respect that gumption. I'm sure everyone's already said it, but you did a good job pushing your comfort zone. just keep it up. when you look up action poses, it helps to use videos rather than still images, so you can get a feel for where the mass and movement is headed and where it came from. also there was one frame where Kubo's right hand is a left hand. :T

# 12   Posted: Aug 3 2020, 06:30 PM
Energy: Nice to see a complete comic from you. It looks like you were taking on some daring angles and compositions, too. I notice that your background doesn't always appear to be behind the characters. Lines and curves behind the characters shouldn't change shape just because the foreground broke them up. When they don't match up, you lose the effect. One option is to draw the background on a different layer and then erase the parts you don't need.

Kubo: I like the variety of angry faces you gave Kazue here. And, aw dang, what a great way to stick Luz in here. The dramatic turn reveal is an oldie but a goodie. I'm not sure if it's necessary to have a translation note if he says "flame spirit" later in the page. I feel like this is a good conclusion to an episode where Kazue's realization about controlling his fire and not hers is thematic throughout the episode. But I understand why that isn't the case.

# 11   Posted: Aug 2 2020, 06:28 PM
Energy: Hey man, big congrats on getting a comic completed! That's no easy task but I hope you're able to take what you've learned and apply it to future comics! I also am seriously glad that you gave us a different story from usual, with Kubo helping and without it devolving into a yelling match. Overall this comic felt like a huge step in the right direction towards improvement, and I'm jazzed to see where you go from here! I'd echo what the others have said with working on references, especially for those dynamic poses--seriously, props for even trying those, they're very hard to do, but some references would really help you sell how the proportions are supposed to work. One specific example I can think of is that you could work on referencing more poses for hands--you tend to do 'Barbie hands' where all the fingers are glued to one another in the same pose, but if you pay attention to your own hands you'll notice that often there'll be at least one finger off doing its own thing. Either curved differently or hanging separate from the others. Still, don't let this discourage you! I can definitely see improvement :'DD

Kubo: Hi I love this comic?? I love Kubo, he's one of my favorite kinds of characters, and he was just. So good in this comic. You do a really really good job of incorporating other characters' narratives into Kubo's, which makes this comic feel both like a Monster of the Week thing while also being part of an overarching story for BOTH characters. Extremely interested to see where you go with Luz being attached to Kubo! Though I agree with Cy, having the little infographic on the last page felt... odd. It seems like that'd be better placed in one of the extra images on his profile, or just not included at all, with the info being worked into the story itself somehow. Maybe by Luz asking why Kubo yanked the rod out at the last second, and Kubo giving him an answer to the effect of "And let you just be dispersed into the ground where you could strike again? Yeah, right."

# 10   Posted: Aug 2 2020, 04:39 PM
Energy - Congrats on submitting a finished comic! It’s nice to see a story from you that isn’t somebody getting aggressive immediately or being treated badly by their opponent for no reason. This is the first comic with a positive interaction in it for a while.

Unfortunately though, that story was pretty weak. It was nice to get some insight into Kazue’s curse, but why was Kubo standing in the middle of nowhere staring into space, just waiting to be approached and give information like a video game NPC? He immediately agrees to help and starts telling her a story before she’s even told him what “this mess” is. Why and how does he know about her curse if she’s just sought him out? And the ending is him telling her to simply get rid of the curse. Isn’t that what she’s trying to figure out in the first place? How to get rid of the curse?  

And please, please do some studies and start using references. People have said this many times before, and yet you recently said in the chat you still rarely do so and it shows. Your anatomy is not going to improve otherwise. Using reference will also prevent mistakes like backwards hands, which I noticed here once or twice. This includes referencing backgrounds. They feel like an afterthought here, and I can tell by the lines that you drew them around the characters afterwards instead of drawing them first to ground the characters from the start. As a result, the bg is very wonky and I can’t tell where the characters are even supposed to be. In the centre of the ruined colosseum? On a hill overlooking it? Sometimes they seem to be in it and sometimes it seems far away.

Some other things to note: this comic was literally 50% headshots (I counted to make sure). I’m guessing this has something to do with fear or inability to pull off full bodies well, I know that that’s what made me initially lean on headshots, which goes back to practice and referencing again. It will ease the difficulty of different kinds of shots and allow you to get some more variety in there. The characters also often don’t face each other as they talk. They do sometimes, but they also tend to stare straight ahead at the camera or in the same direction as each other, when they should be opposite.

Kubo - Excellent quality as usual. I love how you did the flame effects, particularly that blue swathe on page 7, and Luz’s reveal was chilling. I also like the little detail of Kubo assuring Kazue that the spirit was sealed away... but not WHERE. Idk if it was intentional or not, but on the second read I saw it as a clever way to hint that he, not the grounding rod, had contained Luz without actually lying to Kazue.

I agree with Arts on the wolf anthro’s head. It has bothered me for a while but I assumed it had something to do with his size? Like you were trying to portray a little person version of an anthro. But if not then, yeah, definitely look into his proportions. Also, while I liked the cute little graphic at the end, I’d have liked some of the more important information, such as why Luz ended up sealed in Kubo, to have been revealed in the comic itself.

Community Manager
# 9   Posted: Aug 2 2020, 02:52 PM
Energy: congrats on completing this comic, the hard part is keeping the momentum forward but I think you can do it.

Kubo: Great comic and interesting story, I really like how you naturally tied a separate character into the story that also fit with your opponents character. Your art is solid as always. It may be preference but I don't like how you do the wolf guys head. I do think you mentioned his head is unique compared to other anthro heads so it's not as bad but I feel like as a style as a whole it gives most anthros way too much forehead. I understand a big reason for that is likley to keep proportions similar since anthro heads can really fuck with regular proportions and if it's just this guy it's fine. But it's been a while since I have seen you draw other anthros so i'm not sure and I don't think it would work as a style choice for more than just this guy.

# 8   Posted: Jul 30 2020, 11:00 PM
Energy: DUDE...congrats on completing a comic!! I know this has been a massive challenge for you and you should be proud of how far you've come. There's still a lot to learn, but big props on taking the crucial steps.

Kubo: I don't think there's a whole lot I can really pick apart here. I love how you not only re-established Kubo's role and character, but also how you enriched Kazue's character with some backup lore while giving her the spotlight. It's a delicate balance and you managed to pull it off. Great read all around!

# 7   Posted: Jul 29 2020, 09:13 PM
Energy: FUCK YEA FOR COMPLETING A WHOLE ASS COMIC GO YOUUUU. I can see you tried going for more dynamic poses, still could use more practice, like page 6 looks a little stiff.

Kubo: I always enjoy your comics asfasf. Love the story progression in this. Makes me want to see MORE AUGH YOU BETTER FOLLOW UP ON THIS.

# 6   Posted: Jul 29 2020, 04:18 PM
Curses and demons and fire, oh my!

Energy - Heck yes show that canine Kubo who's boss. Your line work is looking more polished and the dynamics of the story has come a long way. Keep on energizing, Energy!

Kubo - It's so cool to see your main man Kubo back at it again! You have a keen sense of detail that is beyond dazzling. Really enjoyed the Luz cameo and can only imagine what sort of mischief they will serve. Great ref update for Kubo too!

# 5   Posted: Jul 28 2020, 10:30 PM
Wow, you're both bringing it, huh? What a fight. Emphasis on fight.

Energy - Nice angles, composition, and panels to go with the action. I'd say be careful with the 180 rule; sometimes it trips me up as far as which character is on which side of the page. I like the foreshortening you've got going. Some action lines could add a little more motion to those already kinetic fights. Keep it up!

Kubo - The inks, colors, and texture are so bomb. The paneling is dynamic and helps guide the eye. I appreciate the backgrounds and effects. The smoke in particular had some nice inks. The fire could also benefit from some crispy inks, should you be so inclined. Anyway, easy to read and hooked me before I even noticed I was invested. I appreciate the bonus page, especially from the pov of future challengers. Thankfully the action made it clear what was happening before the explanation, so kudos, Kubo.

# 4   Posted: Jul 28 2020, 06:45 AM
Energy - Congratulations on another finished piece. Keep at it.

Kubo - Art and story  you got both nailed down! Kubo is definitely one of my fave Entervoid characters as well and I can't wait to see him interact with my own troubled immortal vampire one day!

# 3   Posted: Jul 27 2020, 04:15 PM
Energy- This is likely the best comic i've seen from you since I've joined the site.  You're getting in those cool angles, switching up the panel composition, and even fun character bits.  Keep pushing yourself to do more and good luck with more comics.

Kubo- Kubo's definitely starting to become one of my favorite characters since his return.  You got solid art as always and a real fun and tense story in this one.  I do like how you can mix laid back fun moments with the more frightening combat encounter with the fire spirit.

Approval Committee
# 2   Posted: Jun 29 2020, 07:28 AM
Yes yes yes!!!

# 1   Posted: Jun 29 2020, 12:59 AM
Can't wait to see this one!

Comic Details -

Drawing Time: 3 weeks
Ended: Aug 3rd, 2020
Votes Cast: 20
Page Views: 538
Winner: kubo

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