Speed Death Tournament 2020, Round 1 / Charming and Party vs. Jo-Anne

Speed Death Tournament 2020, Round 1 / Charming and Party vs. Jo-Anne

Speed Death Tournament 2020, Round 1 — Charming and Party vs. Jo-Anne

463 points
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Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
tags: charming and party, jo-anne, light speed death tournament, Lightspeed Death Tourney

366 points
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Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques

Critiques & Comments
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# 13   Posted: Feb 5 2020, 12:08 AM
I love both of these comics, they're so much fun!

Artofjoe: Knowing that these characters came from your webcomic and first made me wary, but seeing them in this comic eased that for me. This short little story doesn't rely on any backstory for your characters and so can stand alone. Your jokes are funny and wholesome and your surprise ending sets up the next round to for an interesting challenge. Good Job!

Boogi: I have grown to love J-anne and your super weird comedy. This was another enjoyable comic from you, my only qualms is that I was left wanting more. I think that last page could have been better used to escalade the hype before the death rather than ending with it. I really want to know more about these trolls and hope to see more about that. Good Job!

# 12   Posted: Feb 4 2020, 11:26 PM
Heavenbat: I liked the lil gags, and my only real complaint is that the end gag feels like a bit of an afterthought, and kinda anticlimactic. I would've liked to have seen more of a reaction, or maybe Charming getting swarmed by guards--just the "My bad." felt like a bit of a letdown after such a good setup.
I agree completely. I was originally planning on having him being tackled, but I panicked and rushed myself. I'll definitely be utilyzing ALL of my time next time. Thanks for the critique!
(Thanks to everyone else for their critiques as well, y'all are so helpful and kind!)
I had them state what they were doing at the beginning, but I'll introduce them better if I move on to round 2.

# 11   Posted: Feb 4 2020, 11:18 PM
Joe: Tbh, while I agree that I don't really know who these characters are or what they're doing here, but tbh I don't think it detracted from the comic? This felt pretty self-contained, and while I may not have known much about the characters, I was able to gather enough from their characterization to at least not be overly confused. I liked the lil gags, and my only real complaint is that the end gag feels like a bit of an afterthought, and kinda anticlimactic. I would've liked to have seen more of a reaction, or maybe Charming getting swarmed by guards--just the "My bad." felt like a bit of a letdown after such a good setup.

Boogi: Jeez man what a brutal death. Gotta give you credit for that. Similar to Joe, though, that end page felt like an... odd note to leave off on. I feel like there were ways you could've tied that in better--as is, it just comes out of left field and doesn't feel like it really adds anything.

# 10   Posted: Feb 4 2020, 11:54 AM
Joe: Drawing little stars may not have been the best choice, but everything is very cutely rendered. Their antics were fun enough on their own, but I have to agree that I felt a little lost about who they were and what they were doing (and oh boy that is a LOT of bio). Maybe some of that could have been left out, since "he's naive and gullible" is the key element of the gag.

Boogidi: If anyone can pull off a big ego and a food motif, it's you! Sometimes how you handle faces in perspective is a little.... odd, but man when you've got the energy and the crazy flowing, you really make a scene. Sometimes your little hard to read when it's particularly busy or scratchy, or the line weights don't really add up (I love the gag on page 2, but the way Jo-Anne's lines are more delicate than the background makes it a little hard to see). The last pages were the strongest.

# 9   Posted: Feb 2 2020, 01:49 PM
Joe: You already know I love your webcomic, and your Void debut fits right in. Your comics are genuinely charming and hilarious, and this one is no exception. The ending made me laugh out loud. I only wish you had included a page before the story giving a brief rundown of all the characters, because someone who hasnt read either your webcomic or Charming's bio wouldn't quite know who Box or the gnome guy are. It doesn't hurt this comic too much, but the joke at the beginning works best if you have all the context.

Boogi: Your style and writing is a great match for Charming and Co. Your side is short and humorous, but lacks substance. It's tough to pull off on a 1 week deadline, but your opponent has all the setup and payoff to make your comic seem silly by comparison.

Web Dev
# 8   Posted: Jan 30 2020, 08:22 AM
Spoiler: artofjoe • show
This was a cute and fun read! I love how you draw Jo-Anne; really just everything is pretty cute. The gag with the "stock characters" was silly, and I just had fun with the whole thing.It would have been nice if you could at least get some tones down, but you only had a week and you already did more than I usually manage to do in a week, so sometimes that's just how it be! I'm looking forward to more from you!

Spoiler: boogi • show
Your stuff is always wild, and I love your finely crafted sound effect haha. There was some wonkiness to your characters, especially Jo-Anne's face at the top of page 3. Everything had somewhat of a sketchy feeling that I'm not sure works on its own. But the story was fun, and it's great to see Jo-Anne just be, well, an actual troll! I'm so curious what this stuff is about her troll ancestry and the war, and would love to see more!

# 7   Posted: Jan 30 2020, 05:50 AM
Joe- Your art style is really charming! It's cute...but not too kiddy if that makes sense? (kinda reminds me of the art for the "Exploding kittens games)The story was really cohesive with an amusing payoff, overall great job here!
Oh I also liked the "Stock character" gag towards the end, I was originally thinking of putting down the lazy background characters, as a crit, because it visually kinda let you down. But the 4th wall break saved it for me.

crit wise- just the background really. The perspective would go wonky at times and they just generally looks rather generic. Your characters are unique and you clearly have fun with them- it'll be cool to see the same energy put into the locations.  
Minor easy fix crit- shrink your speech bubbles a tad to give the panels room to breath.

Boogi- I always feel like a broken record when I comment on your comics! Sorry! But again, the ridiculousness of your character is amusing and you did a good job making everyones movement look dynamic.
the previous crit cover my thoughts, but I'm happy you managed to submit something finished, despite life issues. Great job!

Global Moderator
# 6   Posted: Jan 30 2020, 01:39 AM
ARTOFJOE- Welcome to speed death! Way to come out with both fists swinging! This is a mind boggling page count for the amount of time you were alotted for this match. And a tight little story to boot. Talk about a money dough bamboozle-The shocker death at the end totally made me chuckle. With such a stark ink only style, I think it'd pop even better with more uses of spot blacks and shadows as opposed to the minimal hand you used. This is set at night (which I didnt realize), so fill blacks are definitely your friend.

BOOGIDI- I think you share something with your opponent in that scratchy lines and hatching is being utilized to build your scenes (like the cityscape), but its just coming off as busy and borderline illegible. I definitely echo the  'dont be afraid to use fill blacks! to you as well. I think it will really make your comics pop (and that goes for the both of  you)

Global Moderator
# 5   Posted: Jan 30 2020, 12:02 AM
ARtofJoe: Your style is cute and this is a great first showing for void. I also enjoy your humor in this comic, charming is a fun idiot. I didn't realize this was taking place at night till Cy mentioned it and the main reason for that is the shading comes off as a more daytime setting. Great first showing overall.

Boogidi: Life happens and you were able to put out a great amount considering the unforseen circumstances that came up. You're bodies are improving and once again I really enjoy the work you put into your backgrounds.  Also the idea of Jo-Anne having a money trap was pretty interesting. Keep going at it even when life gets in the way great job with that.

# 4   Posted: Jan 28 2020, 06:03 PM
Joe - What a cute style! You have pretty clean, bold lines and I like the texture you’ve used for some of the backgrounds. The front page looked very nice, I liked the use of different fonts for each character. Overall a fun little comic :)

My only complaint really would be that I’d love to see this in colour, or with some more adventurous shading! I often forgot it was night and wondered why the background was filled with stars. The shading feels kind of like “default well lit area”, without the more intense light and shadows you’d expect from a night scene.

Boogi - This was also fun! I feel your faces have improved a lot with this one, they were a lot more consistent here. I really liked the pose in panel 1 page 4, nice subtle foreshortening. The multicoloured overlapping outlines of Jo-Anne on the final page was a nice effect as well.

I did find the death rather abrupt though? And wasn’t sure what was going on on the last page. All my other issues probably boils down to your lack of time, sorry life threw stuff at you. I also got sick immediately after the tournament started :/

# 3   Posted: Jan 28 2020, 11:41 AM
Yeah this SDT thing is no joke. Originally you may think a week is plenty of time but events and situations arise in an instant that can eat up that precious arting plans

Keep it up! Good luck!

# 2   Posted: Jan 27 2020, 09:57 PM
Awwww, darn, dude, I'm sorry you had such a busy week! :0 I'm honestly just happy you at least didn't default! I can't wait to see what you were able to draw! Thanks for still putting in the effort after all that, that's really cool of you.

# 1   Posted: Jan 27 2020, 01:41 PM
Some fun behind the scenes facts :) : I struggled with this very much. I initially was going to go the ambitious route and make a giant fight scene, for as many pages as I could do, but then I got sick, then I had been chosen for jury duty, and I lost a lot of energy there. So, in the end, I did what I could, and I apologize in advance if some parts are really sloppy, I was rushing to get this done, because I really didn't want to default.  So I submitted mine just now.

Comic Details -

Type: Speed Death Tournament Match
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Feb 4th, 2020
Votes Cast: 23
Page Views: 513
Winner: Artofjoe

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