Speed Death Tournament 2020, Round 1 / B7988 vs. Bubbha Grimmaw

Speed Death Tournament 2020, Round 1 / B7988 vs. Bubbha Grimmaw

Speed Death Tournament 2020, Round 1 — B7988 vs. Bubbha Grimmaw

by Gakken

25.8%
135 points
Page 1Page 2

Crit level: No critique desired, comments encouraged
tags: lsdt


74.2%
389 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8Page 9Page 10

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
tags: b7988, bubbhagrimmaw, entervoid, sdt2020




Critiques & Comments
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ArtsandGoodies
Approval Committee
346 comments
# 20   Posted: Feb 5 2020, 02:30 PM
Symon_says: Flutterbyes I could have skipped the cover lol Thank you for your comment I will have to ground my line weight back and fore.
Artsandgoodies thanks and yes font is my downfall. Could you recommend a font style?

Heavanbat agreed, I will need to spice us Bubbha's presence. There are more sides to him ;p

kubo thank you. The pallet may change slightly indeed

Gakken! I hope to see you again in the normal battles!
Quote

One I personally like using is Bottlerocket BB which is one blambot

Symon_says
Artist
64 comments
# 19   Posted: Feb 5 2020, 01:58 PM
Flutterbyes I could have skipped the cover lol Thank you for your comment I will have to ground my line weight back and fore.
Artsandgoodies thanks and yes font is my downfall. Could you recommend a font style?

Heavanbat agreed, I will need to spice us Bubbha's presence. There are more sides to him ;p

kubo thank you. The pallet may change slightly indeed

Gakken! I hope to see you again in the normal battles!

kubo
Artist
77 comments
# 18   Posted: Feb 4 2020, 11:57 PM
Gakken: I congratulate you on submitting your first comic here! I know you were stressing about this up until the deadline and I hope the experience hasn't soured you to the idea of future matches.

Symon_says: This was an enjoyable comics; It had a full story that I could easily get on board with, you used your opponent's attibutes (or lack there of with their inability to speak) as a main part of the story, and you introduced us to your character with fun and interesting dialogue. I would love to see one more level of grayscale to this comic. The yellow monotone is fun, but some of the panels could do with a bit more depth which another grey would help with. Good Job!

Heavenbat
Artist
93 comments
# 17   Posted: Feb 4 2020, 11:52 PM
Gak: Hey, good effort! One-weekers are hard, lol. Next time, though, don't forget to make sure your pages are big enough to be visible!

Symon: I really enjoy the juxtaposition of space bumpkin speech and the almost poetic narration, especially at the end. You're already aware of the quality issues, so all I'll say is that the events of pages 8&9 are a little muddy; I'm not sure exactly what's going on from one panel to the next, though I can glean from context clues that B79 was spaced. I think some backgrounds or some different angles would've helped; you've got a lot of different angles of the spaceship, but most of the views of Bubbha are fairly static.

ArtsandGoodies
Approval Committee
346 comments
# 16   Posted: Feb 4 2020, 10:39 PM
Gak: Welcome to void comics, Hopefully this is a good lesson on dealing with comics in a time limit. Comics are hard but we can help and it's great you entered this tourney and were able to produce something.

Symon: 10 pages in one week is really nice. I really like how you did the ship all the details on the side of it were really nice. My main crit is the font, it's too big and not a comic font. either go on sties like Dafont, 1001 fonts, or blambot and get a free font to use as they are meant for comics. You can also get away with decreasing the font size a bit so that you can have room for more dialogue, also when sketching plan out where your speech bubbles will be. But that's always an easy fix and you did really good with this comic.

Flutterbyes
Artist
250 comments
# 15   Posted: Feb 4 2020, 11:12 AM
Gakken: Too bad you couldn't finish! A week is a very tight deadline. It would have been nice to get a closer look at what's happening on page 2. Better luck next time!

Symon_says: Ooh, look at you with your title page and everything. Sometimes you're really rocking that rough "Not quite digital, not quite traditional" (even the way part of the image is washed out might be creatively put to use) but as it settles in that it's unintended, the comic sufers for it. If you can't get access to a scanner, see if you can find some better lighting for photographing your pages. Your comic is ambitious, and some hierarchy of line weight would really kick its look up a notch.

Symon_says
Artist
64 comments
# 14   Posted: Feb 3 2020, 03:14 PM
Bobo:
Spoiler: symon • show
Looks like you had to take pictures with your camera instead of using a scanner, which unfortunately messed pretty badly with image quality. I'm assuming it also messed up colors since everything looked sorta yellowy-green, and it doesn't seem like that was intentional. I'm not sure what image program you use to add speech bubbles and stuff, but I think you may want to explore color adjustment options if you have those available. There are ways to correct colors in scanned images and photos to make the final product look closer to how it looks irl. I'd also recommend perhaps finding a different pen or smoother paper for inking; your lines all looked a bit rough and scraggly. You can also just draw at a bigger scale (I would sometimes tape two pieces of paper together and draw on that), then shrink the final product down for smoother lines. Not sure how viable that is with your setup, but I'd test it out and see if it helps. Other than that, I can say that I definitely enjoyed the vibe of being out in deep space, fighting a mysterious cosmic entity, and these characters seem interesting. I hope we get to learn more about them and what their goals are in the next comic! Also, for future reference, "it's" is short for "it is," and "its" without the apostrophe is what you want to use when referring to something belonging to something. It's not the end of the world to have spelling or grammar mistakes, but imo it's a little more professional to make sure it's all correct. I'm happy to proofread if you want, but you're also welcome to ignore me because I may be one of the few who actually cares that much haha.
Quote
Spoiler: Bobo • show
Your opinion is appreciated Bobo. I did use some course paper for that inking and the photos were not the best. I use krita for the digital work and have revisited my practice on this program this last week. Brushing up on this stuff would have been ideal before getting onto this speeding doom train. A proof read would be marvelous. Another set of eyes and brain would be very helpful! I may just go digital all the way and skip the traditional media for lack of scanner.

Bobo
Web Dev
921 comments
# 13   Posted: Feb 2 2020, 01:18 PM
Spoiler: gak • show
I'm sure it's no surprise to say that I wish there was more here. I'm not sure if you just weren't mentally prepared for a comic on a one week deadline or if something happened in your life, but I hope next time goes better for you. Hit me up if you ever need advice on how to handle tight deadlines on this (or anyone on VOID, really; I'm not exactly the fastest worker, so maybe someone else is better equipped to help, but I'm happy to help either way).

Spoiler: symon • show
Looks like you had to take pictures with your camera instead of using a scanner, which unfortunately messed pretty badly with image quality. I'm assuming it also messed up colors since everything looked sorta yellowy-green, and it doesn't seem like that was intentional. I'm not sure what image program you use to add speech bubbles and stuff, but I think you may want to explore color adjustment options if you have those available. There are ways to correct colors in scanned images and photos to make the final product look closer to how it looks irl. I'd also recommend perhaps finding a different pen or smoother paper for inking; your lines all looked a bit rough and scraggly. You can also just draw at a bigger scale (I would sometimes tape two pieces of paper together and draw on that), then shrink the final product down for smoother lines. Not sure how viable that is with your setup, but I'd test it out and see if it helps. Other than that, I can say that I definitely enjoyed the vibe of being out in deep space, fighting a mysterious cosmic entity, and these characters seem interesting. I hope we get to learn more about them and what their goals are in the next comic! Also, for future reference, "it's" is short for "it is," and "its" without the apostrophe is what you want to use when referring to something belonging to something. It's not the end of the world to have spelling or grammar mistakes, but imo it's a little more professional to make sure it's all correct. I'm happy to proofread if you want, but you're also welcome to ignore me because I may be one of the few who actually cares that much haha.

Symon_says
Artist
64 comments
# 12   Posted: Feb 1 2020, 01:32 PM
Flytee: SYMON_SAYS
The comic has a pulpy, old-school sci-fi vibe to it, its quite a unique aesthetic I like it a lot. Your character designs/translation of your opponent is really well done as well. I also love how everyone has defined, strange way of speaking. I'm not usually a fan of overally phonetic speech buuut it worked quite well here. It added to their weird, alien-ness.    

Crit wise, clarity issues/ speech bubbles/ font use have been covered.
The sporadic colouring at the start and on page five feel unnecessary to me and didn't harmonise well with the greenish hue going throughout the comic. I think just a bit more shading and tone instead would've worked better.

Out of curiosity what is your method for colouring? It looks like you just go over the photo digitally, but it could've been coloured with promarkers. I can't tell! It's driving me nuts!
Quote

Thanks Flytee! Space bumpkin speech has it's quirks. I'm hoping to get more of them tones and shades in the future. I used layer styles like grain merge and darken and such with colored layers.

Charlie: I too hope things aren't cause of more space ghosts.

Fun comic! A little hard to follow at times but I do like sci-fi :)
Quote
Dag-gummin' space ghosts! Thanks Charlie! I need more establishing shots, I definitely went too close up and personal.

Heathen: Symon: Please do more marker colors like on their ref sheet, I love your traditional look when it's more polished, it reminds me of 90s video game art, the sort of stuff that used to grace the pages of Nintendo Power and Hardcore Gamer. Photographing pages with a phone or tablet camera is perfectly fine, but this is awful quality. Sometimes you do what you gotta do, I guess. Can't wait to see your next round.
Quote
Thank you Heathen and I am internally conflicted over traditional and digital media. Until I get a scanner I may just opt for digital. There is much to consider.

Heathen
Artist
350 comments
# 11   Posted: Jan 31 2020, 07:39 PM
Gakken: Hope this was a learning experience, don't stop.

Symon: Please do more marker colors like on their ref sheet, I love your traditional look when it's more polished, it reminds me of 90s video game art, the sort of stuff that used to grace the pages of Nintendo Power and Hardcore Gamer. Photographing pages with a phone or tablet camera is perfectly fine, but this is awful quality. Sometimes you do what you gotta do, I guess. Can't wait to see your next round.

Charlie
Artist
730 comments
# 10   Posted: Jan 31 2020, 02:53 PM
I too hope things aren't cause of more space ghosts.

Fun comic! A little hard to follow at times but I do like sci-fi :)

Flytee
Artist
102 comments
# 9   Posted: Jan 31 2020, 09:33 AM
gak- better luck next time, those first panels looked real promising. Also don't be afraid to ask for help in the submission process if you're unsure on sizes!

SYMON_SAYS
The comic has a pulpy, old-school sci-fi vibe to it, its quite a unique aesthetic I like it a lot. Your character designs/translation of your opponent is really well done as well. I also love how everyone has defined, strange way of speaking. I'm not usually a fan of overally phonetic speech buuut it worked quite well here. It added to their weird, alien-ness.    

Crit wise, clarity issues/ speech bubbles/ font use have been covered.
The sporadic colouring at the start and on page five feel unnecessary to me and didn't harmonise well with the greenish hue going throughout the comic. I think just a bit more shading and tone instead would've worked better.

Out of curiosity what is your method for colouring? It looks like you just go over the photo digitally, but it could've been coloured with promarkers. I can't tell! It's driving me nuts!

Symon_says
Artist
64 comments
# 8   Posted: Jan 30 2020, 10:20 AM
Fred v2.0.1: What peculiar friends. Be careful how you set up your shots, despite all the narration it got hard to follow what was going on.
Quote
I did get a little rushed and didn't distinguish much inside The Starcophagus with establishing shots I must work on this. Thank you fred

Kozispoon: SYMON_SAYS- I don't know why but this color throughout appeals to me. It's like a piss yellow, or overexposed film. It's giving me old alien films of yesteryear. Also I love how these space pirates talk. It's so swarmy!
 think the biggest thing I'd say to be mindful of is your word bubble placement. You tend to choose tight cramped areas where there's plenty of stuff going on that it crowds all your elements. Thing is ,you have areas that are open and empty, but the word bubbles arent placed there. Also considering your page size, your font could afford to be smaller to net you more comic panel space. What font are you using now? If you havent familiarized yourself with dafont.com, I'd highly recommend it.
Quote
dafont.com you say? I will indeed check it out. To be honest I almost left out all the dialog other than the narrative being under the influence of this entries due date being Sunday, but silly me, I had a whole other day to finagle. Font size is a problem for me but if I stick to this scale 1000 pixel wide I can manage slightly more petite text. The color was to be reminiscent of old timey parchment and films but there could have been more to it. Thank you Kozispoon!

Kozispoon
Approval Committee
1076 comments
# 7   Posted: Jan 30 2020, 01:47 AM
GAKKEN- I...I got nothing. Your comic page is so small I can't really make out whats goin on to critique it. Sorry

SYMON_SAYS- I don't know why but this color throughout appeals to me. It's like a piss yellow, or overexposed film. It's giving me old alien films of yesteryear. Also I love how these space pirates talk. It's so swarmy!
 think the biggest thing I'd say to be mindful of is your word bubble placement. You tend to choose tight cramped areas where there's plenty of stuff going on that it crowds all your elements. Thing is ,you have areas that are open and empty, but the word bubbles arent placed there. Also considering your page size, your font could afford to be smaller to net you more comic panel space. What font are you using now? If you havent familiarized yourself with dafont.com, I'd highly recommend it.

Fred v2.0.1
Artist
496 comments
# 6   Posted: Jan 28 2020, 04:00 PM
What peculiar friends. Be careful how you set up your shots, despite all the narration it got hard to follow what was going on.

Symon_says
Artist
64 comments
# 5   Posted: Jan 28 2020, 11:55 AM
Good effort Gakken! I'm glad I captured your characters always changing mysterious figure lol

Thecydork I had to photograph the pages because of no scanner. I would like to invest in one of them fancy miniature ones that would help me out, of course I should just go with using the digital drawing and can the traditional base...

But the SDT is an enlightening experience

TheCydork
Artist
128 comments
# 4   Posted: Jan 28 2020, 05:48 AM
Gak - Ahh what happened? Some nice-looking compositions on the first page, second one is super small though. In the future make sure pages are between 800-1000px wide, and try not to get too bogged down with the perfect idea or what have you. One weekers are tough and you really have to budget your time. Even if you’re not the biggest fan of an idea, as soon as you have one you should just go for it so that you can produce something that’s at least a finished story, and legible.

Symon - Digging the shots of the spaceship you include in your comic, very detailed. I couldn’t get a good sense of what was happening though due to the lack of colour and use of mostly closeups, which meant I couldn’t really see the environment your characters were in. An establishing shot of the interior may have been more helpful. I also think it would be better for you to scan your pages - the flash and yellow colour were quite distracting and made the speech bubbles stick out.

By the way, were you colouring digitally on top of the photo? There’s an odd quality to the colours that are present and a lot of gaps beside the lines that make it look like you did so.

Gakken
Artist
5 comments
# 3   Posted: Jan 28 2020, 12:43 AM
Awesome job Symon! you defo got the mysterious aspect of B7!

Gakken
Artist
5 comments
# 2   Posted: Jan 20 2020, 10:24 PM
Aha- good luck to you too *sobS*

Symon_says
Artist
64 comments
# 1   Posted: Jan 20 2020, 05:32 PM
Alright! Aliens everywhere! Let us give them a good show Gakken.

Space. There's too much of it and it's everywhere.

Good luck!

Comic Details -

 
Type: Speed Death Tournament Match
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Feb 4th, 2020
Votes Cast: 25
Page Views: 312
Winner: Symon_says
 

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