Iain MacTavish vs. Kit and Jade

Iain MacTavish vs. Kit and Jade

Iain MacTavish vs. Kit and Jade

Icon for Iain MacTavish36.5%
214 points
Page 1Page 2

Crit level: No critique desired, comments encouraged

by Brabbit

Icon for Kit and Jade63.5%
372 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8Page 9Page 10Page 11Page 12Page 13Page 14Page 15

Crit level: No preference
tags: sad elf, tiny child

Critiques & Comments
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Community Manager
# 5   Posted: Nov 21 2019, 12:09 AM
Buggy- sorry that life happend i wish you the best moving forward and good luck with Heavyweight and I hope this doesn't weigh on you or slow you down. I will say i do like the way you drew Kit and Jade in this.

Brabbit: I love your stories and how sweet you make them. it's really special just how pure you're characters and really refreshing honestly. I do like the backgrounds here there are there enough to give a good sense of location and have some details. I will disagree with the proportion crit at least for this comic, since this primarily contains 3 characters  and the older character being an elf him looking young is fine for me, however this is something you should think about moving forward when they come across varied characters with more body types.
My main crit would be with shading. You do some nice pencil shading on Iain's under coat on page 5 and 7 and i wish that was present in more parts of the characters to help add some more depth to them, like on Iain's collar. Beyond that good job with the comic and I look forward to seeing more Kit and Jade as beams of Hope Void kind of needs.

# 4   Posted: Nov 15 2019, 08:55 PM
Buggy - Ah so sorry to hear that dude :( Hope stuff eases up soon. Also, the style you used to draw yourself on the last page was super cute and I’ve never seen it before? Would honestly be interested in seeing you try a comic in that style!

Brabbit - Aw, this was a sweet comic. I especially enjoyed Jade’s adorable expressions and the montage on page 4 - I didn’t notice on my first read, but I really liked the subtle changes such as more notes on the pinboard in the background as the days went on! Speaking of backgrounds, I personally liked how you did them and didn’t feel they were too minimal. You had the right balance of the occasional very detailed panel, then a couple of lines in other panels to imply the scenes we’ve seen before. There were only a few times where I thought “hm, too plain”.

I second Flytee with the proportions though, and I also feel the story was a bit shallow. On page 11 Kit says he hopes they help with “whatever’s hurting his heart so much” but Iain doesn’t seem all that hurt throughout the comic. He’s very willing to help, not grumpy and never really appears troubled outside his internal monologue. You show a lot of Jade’s eagerness to learn, maybe one of those moments, the focus could have been on Iain seeming down. The audience knows Iain has some emotional baggage, but since it’s not really shown here, it seems a bit of a jump for Kit to interpret a vaguely pessimistic conversation as Iain’s heart “hurting so much”. Additionally, the wording of the monologue on that page doesn’t flow well and lessens the emotional impact. “I guess it seems like not much to you... but to me it means so much” might read better if written as “I guess it doesn't seem like much to you... but it means so much to me”.

# 3   Posted: Nov 15 2019, 07:12 PM
Buggy: We understand, life happens, there's always next time!

Brabbit: This comic was so sweet I think I have tooth decay. I love how expressive you make the characters and I got a really good sense of movement and energy from them. The colorless characters on the gray backgrounds really helped the characters pop. I think about my only gripe is maybe adding more detail to the backgrounds? Some of them do seem a little like they were an after thought. (I always feel bad critiquing people because I always point out stuff I'm SUPER GUILTY of...) This was a great comic overall and I'm really looking forward to reading more from you!

# 2   Posted: Nov 15 2019, 03:57 PM
Buggy: Gah, sorry life got the best out of you, but it was nice to see that you had something really good planned. Your style is really pretty!

Brabbit: I think my favorite page is the 4th one. Good way to depict how time passed between Iain and Jade practicing. Quite the fan of keeping the backgrounds gray, and making the characters stand out.

# 1   Posted: Nov 15 2019, 03:50 PM
buggy- maybe next time!

Brabbit- The cute art and sentimental writing came together to create a very wholesome comic. In terms of crit I don't have a lot, I feel like you had a vision in mind, and you nailed it.
I do have a minor gripe with the proportions of the characters. It makes it kinda difficult to pinpoint their ages, since everyone has large heads and big eyes. I think being mindful of conveying age in the future could be an interesting step.

Comic Details -

Drawing Time: 3 weeks
Ended: Nov 21st, 2019
Votes Cast: 17
Page Views: 598
Winner: Brabbit

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