Intro Story / Lilo

Intro Story / Lilo

Intro Story — Lilo


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TheCydork
Artist
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53 comments
# 7   Posted: Sep 23 2019, 02:56 AM
Pretty much everyone has already said what I thought ^^ Great inks, not so great story. Lilo says she never thought she would be back... why not use some of that internal monologue to give us a little hint as to WHY she thought she wouldn't come back? Even a little addition would have made the intro much better imo.

ArtsandGoodies
Approval Committee
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279 comments
# 6   Posted: Sep 16 2019, 08:13 PM
I made a more detailed crit for the approval but i wanna say good job on getting her in and I love your inks, this comic style is something I love and want to see more of. Look forward to seeing your battles as well as your story and characterization for Lilo.

Read Living Meat! -Reecer6
Artist
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263 comments
# 5   Posted: Sep 15 2019, 09:39 PM
Yooo, this was a stealth bomb! So used to people spending months in the Discord before finally dropping their first character.

Your inks are cool, and you've definitely got a sense of style here I can't wait to see in future comics! Unfortunately, this particular comic isn't super exemplary for, uh... I guess everyone has already said. It barely explains anything about Lilo, and the description isn't much more clear! Doesn't give really anything for someone battling you to work off of. Still, you can definitely build up from that in future comics, so I really hope you do!

Heavenbat
Artist
icon
59 comments
# 4   Posted: Sep 15 2019, 04:28 PM
Visually, this comic is absolutely stunning! The heavy inks, the posing, the textures and toning... it's all a treat to look at! But, like the others have said, I feel like it kind of fails as an intro. I know... basically nothing about this character, her motivations, her personality, what she's doing in Void, what she's "getting started" on... It feels like this comic could've benefited from an extra page or so. It does do a good job of setting up curiosity and intrigue, but for something like an intro comic, we need a bit more information.

Still, I'm excited to see where you go with her!!

Heathen
Artist
icon
332 comments
# 3   Posted: Sep 14 2019, 02:30 AM
This intro really doesn't tell me anything about her other than she's some sort of vigilante,  and even that isn't clear. The last panel on page 1 serves no purpose. I love the old Void vibes this comic's giving me,  though,  and I'm hit listing you for the art alone. I want to see a lot more of this.

Rivana
Artist
icon
40 comments
# 2   Posted: Sep 13 2019, 07:22 AM
Welcome to Void Nekidfury! You have a really strong style and your inks are amazing (kinda jealous lol). I understand that Lilo is a very mysterious character but I wish we kinda find out more about her in her intro. It would've been nice to give a little narrative background or more insight on her thoughts on the second page where she jumped off the building since there is ample space there for more text.

Either way, your art is amazing and I am really looking forward to finding out more about the enigmatic Lilo!

Aeolim
Artist
icon
8 comments
# 1   Posted: Sep 13 2019, 02:02 AM
Ooooo I absolutely love your inkwork in this comic! Your character seems very interesting and mysterious based on the vibe I'm getting which I'm very excited for!  I like the way you drew her poses as well, they're v dynamic.

However I feel like your comic is way too short and it barely explained her story or gave me an idea of her background? Cuz this intro could just be for any character, it doesn't feel very specific to yours.

Other than that I'm excited to see your future comics with this character!

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Ended: Sep 19th, 2019
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