Invitational Tournament 2019: Round 2 / Mary vs. Iain MacTavish

Invitational Tournament 2019: Round 2 / Mary vs. Iain MacTavish

Invitational Tournament 2019: Round 2 — Mary vs. Iain MacTavish

45.9%
422 points
Page 1Page 2

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
tags:

54.1%
498 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 8Page 9

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques



Critiques & Comments
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Flutterbyes
Artist
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198 comments
# 6   Posted: Jul 2 2019, 04:53 PM
Marymuscle: That was a fun little story! I loved how cute Mary looks in the "oops" panels.  The dialog seems a bit unpolished with spelling errors, and I think there were some missed opportunities to sell Iain's mood changing.

BuggyPumpkin: And in a sobering story, we see some of Iain's powers in action. I like the narrative (Oh, yeah, picking fights with people has consequences and can get deadly, although she did start it, with hammer fists). I think you could do more with characters' expressions and body language, with clear and dramatic staging. Animators talk about this a lot, as does How to Draw Comics the Marvel Way.

Mokachahan
Artist
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13 comments
# 5   Posted: Jun 30 2019, 12:38 PM
Marymuscle, I was having a great time with this short comic, man oh man! Mary is so hammy and down to fight, that she is honestly growing on me as one of my favorites! I do recommend autocorrect for next time since there were some typos around... I also agree with earlier and the panels seem like you drew them as you went on--next time maybe storyboarding or a draft to organize it all up first might help?

Buggypumpkin, your art is so clean and pretty! Im so sad for Iain too--what kind of sad past did he have? I NEED TO KNOW! But while your art is so smooth and clear, it's also a bit stiff--I don't seem to see the action in their movements as much as I want to! Maybe play with the angles a bit more? Either way loved it! In a sense,because I also hate that Iain has to suffer so...DON'T CRY, ELF BOY! HANG IN THERE!

Mokachahan
Artist
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13 comments
# 4   Posted: Jun 30 2019, 12:37 PM
I totally double posted and I dont know how to delete comments so I'll live with this shame

      Edited Jun 30 2019,  12:40 PM by Mokachahan

Kozispoon
Approval Committee
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1046 comments
# 3   Posted: Jun 29 2019, 12:17 AM
MARYMUSCLE- I was wondering how your girl was going to tackle an opponent who seems pretty chill and borderline pacifist. I loved Mary's expressions and hamminess when she starts mucking around the shop. I just wish you'd drawn more of the shop itself to really get a feel of the impact she was making. I gotta say I think your comic pages would benefit from a different format. Your panels feel really haphazard and crowded. Give some of your fav artists here, or even commercial comics a look to get some inspiration on page format and composition.

BUGGYPUMPKIN- Oooh, I see what you're doing. I love this present day follow along with Lain. Not to mention seeing some actual consequences to violent actions. Dug that Charlie cameo ;) Definitely interested in getting more peeks into your character past as you comic and battle on.
You have some great art and a polished look to your characters, but  I'm surprised that such cool action and interaction between them felt really muted. There isn't any action in the actual action scenes, no sense of impact or punch when the vines come forth or when Mary goes for an elbow punch. As someone who also struggles depicting action, I can sympathize, but definitely start collecting some reference. Studying sequential action will really benefit you.

Elyan
Artist
icon
74 comments
# 2   Posted: Jun 26 2019, 01:03 PM
Marymuscle your side was short and sweet. I really chuckled about her sillyness.

BuggyPumpkin dude those are some nice round pages. with a longer deadline this would have been reaaaally great to read. I really feel sorry for Ian. Its tragic for sure... my only issue is that we dont get to know why he´s so down in the first place. i hope you dive into this a little next time.

Aeolim
Artist
icon
8 comments
# 1   Posted: Jun 26 2019, 08:52 AM
HHHHHH NOOOOO IAIN D”: this angst is too much ;-; but it’s done so well! Feels are good for a comic and I wish you luck!

Marymuscle your comic despite how short it is made me crack a laugh, it’s so hilarious! Well done and good luck to you too!!

Comic Details -

 
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Jul 2nd, 2019
Votes Cast: 26
Page Views: 385
Winner: BuggyPumpkin
 

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