Intro Story / JaJa

Intro Story — JaJa

by Footini

This comic has not been rated; viewer discretion advised.

Icon for JaJa
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4

Crit level: Open to any comments or critiques
tags: Intro, jaja, jamilia "jaja" rojas

Critiques & Comments
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# 8   Posted: Jun 18 2019, 11:58 PM
I want to give a big thanks to everyone who took the time to comment on my first comic made for this site.  I hope this is the first of many works I make with you folks; I look forward to improving with your help.

# 7   Posted: Jun 18 2019, 11:49 PM
footini big thumbs up you provided an introcomic while having her in an invitational this is super thoughtfull!
as for the art. its clear work i must say this. your strong saturated colours can work quiet fine though i would suggest working on bolder lineart to contrast it a little. for me these were a bit overwhelming.
I´m looking foward to your next works given i see potential in your backgrounds gettting some more substance. an easy way to give your backgrounds a little depth might be desaturating the distant objects/buildings. it seperates foreground to far background and makes it easier to orientate.

This works neatly for Jaja the powerhouse and her gadgets.

# 6   Posted: Jun 18 2019, 11:39 PM
Welcome to VOID Jaja! What an explosive introduction to boot.

I super dig the neon and lights- really made your version of the city this cyberpunk paradise. Also those punching powers! The panel with the multiple fists was really neat.

I definitely can't wait to see this gal in action. :)

# 5   Posted: Jun 18 2019, 09:02 PM
Great character and comic! The action sequences were well thought out and I especially love the DBZ-esque bullet punching. I'm also digging the use of bright colors that really make the city pop. I will echo what others have said about word balloons and making sure background elements stay consistent from panel to panel (not like I'm one to talk) I'm looking forward to seeing more from this character!

Community Manager
# 4   Posted: Jun 18 2019, 08:25 PM
This is a cool introduction to Jaja with her immediately in action jumping out of the building and into action. Also your colors are delightful. I would agree with bobo in that some of the transitions between panels some of the background elements changed. I would also once again recommend finding another program to help with word bubbles and fonts and to clean up the gutters. an easy way you can do that is have a layer on top of everything else except the panels that is just white to hide anything else over it.

# 3   Posted: Jun 17 2019, 04:54 PM
Nothing like introducing a character by having her jump through a window! I love the hues of the city, but I think Jaja might be visually merging with them sometimes because the values are too close. Also, I notice that sometimes things extend beyond the panels. Have you tried masking out the space so it doesn't matter?

Lady Jade
# 2   Posted: Jun 17 2019, 02:49 PM
I'm hyped for this character! I'm behind on reading all the Invitational comics, so I'll have to jump right on hers after this. I love your use of interesting objects and buildings in your backgrounds, and would just recommend you watch to make sure that everything is consistent between panels. There were a few transitions where I couldn't place the stuff I saw in the previous panel anywhere in the next panel, even though I was expecting to see them. Not a huge deal, but something to watch out for. Other than that, I loved the colors and can't wait to see what's next!

# 1   Posted: Jun 17 2019, 12:18 PM
I really dig the action-sequences, with the jumping and the running and the fighting, they give a real sense of motion and I'm looking forward to see it in further comics, I think you can make some great fights happening!

... but the CRASH-bubble needs to change.. right now it looks like its a speech-bubble, as if Jaja is literally yelling "Crash!" ; Perhaps try removing the white bubble altogether (just have "Crash" float in mid-air with bolder text.. like you did with "BOOM") or make it a different color, or change the border or... anything really, now the sound-effect just looks weird in my opinion

Comic Details -

Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Jun 18th, 2019
Votes Cast: 17
Page Views: 1264

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