Intro Story / Gutsmasher

Intro Story / Gutsmasher

Intro Story — Gutsmasher


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Critiques & Comments
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Heathen
Artist
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316 comments
# 21   Posted: Feb 11 2019, 11:47 AM
I love that they just hang out inside the dumpster like it’s her apartment balcony. The little sky shot before that is a nice bit of pacing as well. Honestly, when I read this on my phone at work, it didn’t grab me as much as I wanted it to, but reading it again on my tablet, there is a lot to like in these pages. I think the flat colors may be doing you a disservice, because your color choices and lack of any spot blacks or color shading makes the art read as much more amateur than it actually is. There’s some good anatomy and angles, and dynamic poses and great expressions going on. So I’d like to see you push some depth and dimension in your figures and see what that does for the overall quality of your comics.

I would be really curious to see how this would look in black and white, with some good spot blacks and maybe some screen tones for shading, manga style.

      Edited Feb 11 2019,  11:49 AM by Heathen

Petrichor
Artist
icon
10 comments
# 20   Posted: Feb 11 2019, 10:50 AM
Thanks for all the critique and comments! i'll take them all into consideration and try to improve in my next comic.
Oh, and about the oversaturation: I actually didn't know the comic was THAT bright until i opened it in my phone and i'm really sorry...  
Seems like my notebook screen was a little too dark and is not showing the colors as they really are. Next time they won't be so saturated.

Happy September 19th! -Reecer6
Artist
icon
261 comments
# 19   Posted: Feb 10 2019, 04:22 PM
i too love this lizard.

and also the pacing. it's good pacing. love that exposition.

Viperchief
Artist
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209 comments
# 18   Posted: Feb 7 2019, 08:38 AM
Loving the character and her story, can't wait to see what comes of it.  Really loved your storytelling in only three pages.  I feel like I really know Gut Smasher already.  The art critiques I have are already mentioned, looking forward to watching the growth of your art and storytelling!  Congrats on getting her in!

Astrodile
Artist
icon
101 comments
# 17   Posted: Feb 6 2019, 12:02 AM
GUT SMASHER!! GUT SMASHER!!! I'll make a critique later but GOD I'M SO GLAD SHE'S IN. 10/10 WOULD LOVE TO FIGHT!!!!

Julz
Artist
icon
371 comments
# 16   Posted: Feb 5 2019, 06:43 PM
Hi, welcome to void!
This comic is very cute! It flows like a well written comedic manga. The expressions are hilarious, I loved the arm chomp page 2 panel 1. There character is charming, I'm into this and I'm not even a wrestling fan. The kitten is gunna stay through this right?
My criticism is this:
There are alot of high intensity colors and warm colors. The last panel of page 3 was a bit releiving on my eyes. Very cool temperature blue. Most panels are highly saturated and its tiring on the eyes. You need to work on shadows too. There are hardly any shadows in any of this. It may be beneficial to look up tutorials online, but what alot of people do is pick a color lower in value (darker) and a little more saturated, sometimes sliding the hue to a very nearby color, can add alot of depth. Like I said, there are alot of tutorials for adding shadows to various things (like skintones, gold, metals, hair etc)
You'll find that shadows help to ground the characters and the world. ;3

      Edited Feb 5 2019,  06:44 PM by Julz

Orion
Artist
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202 comments
# 15   Posted: Feb 5 2019, 01:31 PM
This character and this comic are delightful in every way. Good work getting in! I can't wait to see this wrestle lady wipe the floor with the best of them!

Comicwise this is a lot of fun. Some great expressions and visual gags. You got a good handle on color and figure and your designs hold a lot of personality. Still there is a lot of room for improvement. Your word balloons and composition could use some tightening in some spots. You're making some great atmospheric illustrations but they could be pushed with some tighter compositions and line work (especially on the last page with the balcony scene.  

You got a lot to bring to the table and I'm glad ours was the table you choose. Now lets see what you got! >:)

Alouisse Ver
Artist
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40 comments
# 14   Posted: Feb 5 2019, 11:00 AM
The critiques I had in mind have already been said, so let me say this is a well-done intro! Easy to follow story, and the character and visuals were great. I’m looking forward to seeing Gut fight some wrestlers!

Badger
Artist
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33 comments
# 13   Posted: Feb 5 2019, 10:48 AM
I have to express my love for this character already, she just has so much personality and your expressions are great! It really does feel like you communicated a lot about her in just 3 pages and it makes me want to see more. A couple things I could point out is that on page 3 panels 4 and 5, on my first reading I got the reading order of the word bubbles confused and read the leftmost bubble first on panel 4; on panel 5 I read the leftmost bubble last. Its placement seems to lead into panel 6 so that might be why my mind thought it was the last bubble that should be read, if that makes sense. Also, on the first panel of page 3, I didn’t notice Gut Smasher was hanging out in a dumpster at first, I’m thinking changing the angle of that shot would make it communicate better? Overall though your intro is looking really good and I’m not gonna lie I laughed really hard at the bottom panel on page 2 lol, I can’t wait to see more of your character!!

Petrichor
Artist
icon
10 comments
# 12   Posted: Feb 5 2019, 09:49 AM
ArtsandGoodies: This was a fantastic intro for the character and I look forward to seeing more. I think the thing that makes this so amazing is all the various expressions you do, all the different expressions you give Gut Smasher make her instantly a memorable character there are so many of them and all of them are amazing. All the changes you do with the eyes are amazing.

The one thing I would have to crit in this is the word balloons. The narration bubbles are fine but in particular all the word balloons on page 3 are noticeably the weak spot in a great comic. Here's a good site that gives a bunch of tips for making word balloons that can help: http://www.blambot.com/articles_tips.shtml
A couple of things in particular to work on:
The brush you used for the word bubbles doesn't seem to have too much anti-aliasing so it they look a choppy compared to everything else.
Your word bubble arrows are also inconsistent in the size they end in and most end up being too wide at the end.

Word bubbles are important but I only spent so much time on that because everything else in this comic is great and you made a great character that I look forward to seeing you be in battles with.
Quote

thanks for the help! i had a hard time figuring out how to make speech bubbles... i'll surely follow these tips and try to improve! thanks again.

Hellis
Artist
icon
210 comments
# 11   Posted: Feb 5 2019, 08:37 AM
Pacing for this was sexy. It flowed tremendously well, no jump was jarring, each thing led naturally to the other, the punchline was solid, the tone was pretty damn funny. I love that I feel like I already know this character already, good job.

Radji
Artist
icon
523 comments
# 10   Posted: Feb 5 2019, 06:50 AM
it's an incredibly good intro. Well written too, and shows your skills at posing rather well. That character of yours also is fun in her concept, we do need more pro wrestlers in VOID ^^

ArtsandGoodies
Approval Committee
icon
260 comments
# 9   Posted: Feb 4 2019, 11:48 PM
This was a fantastic intro for the character and I look forward to seeing more. I think the thing that makes this so amazing is all the various expressions you do, all the different expressions you give Gut Smasher make her instantly a memorable character there are so many of them and all of them are amazing. All the changes you do with the eyes are amazing.

The one thing I would have to crit in this is the word balloons. The narration bubbles are fine but in particular all the word balloons on page 3 are noticeably the weak spot in a great comic. Here's a good site that gives a bunch of tips for making word balloons that can help: http://www.blambot.com/articles_tips.shtml
A couple of things in particular to work on:
The brush you used for the word bubbles doesn't seem to have too much anti-aliasing so it they look a choppy compared to everything else.
Your word bubble arrows are also inconsistent in the size they end in and most end up being too wide at the end.

Word bubbles are important but I only spent so much time on that because everything else in this comic is great and you made a great character that I look forward to seeing you be in battles with.

Petrichor
Artist
icon
10 comments
# 8   Posted: Feb 4 2019, 01:34 PM
aaaAAAAAHH thank you guys so much for the kind coments!! i was really nervous to upload this since it's the first time i make a comic for real! i'm really glad you liked her and am still looking forward to battle you Shen! :'D

SirJellyRaptor
Artist
icon
54 comments
# 7   Posted: Feb 4 2019, 11:48 AM
Hello yes I am here to Stan the friend shaped lizard.

Now I have another reason to get my own lizard in Here

Pita
Think Tank
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174 comments
# 6   Posted: Feb 4 2019, 10:14 AM
I am here for Gut Smasher and her pizza security antics.

zee
Artist
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129 comments
# 5   Posted: Feb 3 2019, 09:51 PM
Wow Hello I Love Her

This is a great intro comic!
The pacing is perfect and I feel like we've got good insight into the character already.
Can't wait to see you battle!

Desichan
Think Tank
icon
181 comments
# 4   Posted: Feb 3 2019, 08:55 PM
omg ill be honest i initially had no strong feelings about this character BUT I NOW LOVE THEM WITH ALL MY HEART 10/10 GOOD GUT SMASHER WE STAN A QUEEN

yarnwitch
Think Tank
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277 comments
# 3   Posted: Feb 3 2019, 08:40 PM
GUT SMASHER GUT SMASHER GUT SMASHER GUT SMASHER GUT SMASHER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
what a good friend!

kubo
Artist
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57 comments
# 2   Posted: Feb 3 2019, 08:31 PM
Holy smokes. I love this so much! So simple, so funny. And the paneling is clean and clear and beautiful. Good job!

Shen
Global Moderator
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1278 comments
# 1   Posted: Feb 3 2019, 08:27 PM
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH FIGHT ME

Comic Details -

 
Ended: Feb 10th, 2019
Votes Cast: 21
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