Desichats: Nice use of style shift! Your combo of strong dark inks and pastel cuteness is really strong. I love the cartoony things like pointing out of one panel into another on page 3. "I'm not a monster, I'm LALA!" was a great line, like something out of a creepy-cute children's book. Some of the action, like the sneak attack and the violent comeback, could have been a touch clearer.
Zeemwill: Interesting to see the cruel Lalala tragic pop idol victimized by her "servants" in a standalone story! You both changed your opponent and made the story still about them at the core, and it makes a good story, but I suppose you can't deny something is missing. Azure's such a fanboy, but since the triplets are the real star for most of the comic, I forgot and then saw his shirt and cracked up.
Love Child Tag Team Death Tournament, Round 2 / Lalala vs. Azure & Co
Critiques & Comments
# 14
Posted:
Apr 6 2018, 08:52 PM
# 13
Posted:
Apr 6 2018, 08:41 PM
Both of these comics are very good and both manage to have improved from the last one.
Team Desicat: I love how much more of a solid direction you gave Lalala and the creepy two sided personality you solidified for her in this.
Team RhimZee: Both your comics have been fantastic and this story was very enjoyable and her sacrifice at the end was well done and that final panel really got me.
Team Desicat: I love how much more of a solid direction you gave Lalala and the creepy two sided personality you solidified for her in this.
Team RhimZee: Both your comics have been fantastic and this story was very enjoyable and her sacrifice at the end was well done and that final panel really got me.
# 12
Posted:
Apr 6 2018, 07:23 PM
I love both of these comics, yall are so talented and Lala and Azure are such great characters, im sad you cant both win! I love Lala's yandere and Azure being a fangirl, and these are both fantastically written with gorgeous colours! I hope in the end we all live on in the high school AU~
# 11
Posted:
Apr 5 2018, 09:38 AM
Just wanted to let you guys know we really appreciate the critiques! We took them to account from the first round and I'm glad it's showing. We think it might be an important to mention however that we actually switched roles this time around. Desi did most of the sketching and the Ink work while I did the layouts and coloring. During round one, It was my inks with Desi's coloring style.
We know it's about how well we work together as a team but if this seems like a dip in quality, it's because we both decided to tackle this comic differently o/
We know it's about how well we work together as a team but if this seems like a dip in quality, it's because we both decided to tackle this comic differently o/
# 10
Posted:
Apr 4 2018, 08:54 PM
TEAM DESICAT- Your style really lends itself well to your opponent. I already thought Azure was pretty cute, but now they're ridiculously adorable.
It's great to see a 'bad guy' be so cute and this second round really ups the ante.Its about time we had some real blood on our hands- bug brother blood! Also I see you took some of the crit into account back in round one about the stakes as I really felt the danger with Lala being captured and strapped down. The added darting eyeballs was a nice touch. Even the tears welling up in her eyes once she gets loose really adds more dimension to her apart from loud bratty bad guy. I know I'm just focusing on the little things, but for me its the little things and details that build up a cool story.
That said, it seems the rigors of the tournament is bleeding into the quality of the work. Rally! Get yourself back to that round one caliber quality!
TEAM RHIMZEE- Ugh those colors, SO GOOD. Honestly from the thumbnails alone, I got such a lovely cohesive color story from beginning to end. Opening up these pages did not disappoint- and AH HA! I was right, there was a little Capgras lurkin round in there. Nice in-void easter egg and what could it meeeeeean? :DD
I loved the build up to cheering Lalala on. Totally cut from a concert anime- even in her "Everyone.." lines, but it wasn't cheesy. Just the right amount of garnish to make it a familiar nod that made me smile.
There really would be no way to kill this opponent and come out the other side with a likable protagonist, so the decision to have her self sacrifice was not only clever, but a very heroic, if not bittersweet ending. Still though, I miss the brash and bratty personality Desicat forged in round one here. We only got a halfhearted swat of a newspaper. Where's your opponents fire?
It's great to see a 'bad guy' be so cute and this second round really ups the ante.Its about time we had some real blood on our hands- bug brother blood! Also I see you took some of the crit into account back in round one about the stakes as I really felt the danger with Lala being captured and strapped down. The added darting eyeballs was a nice touch. Even the tears welling up in her eyes once she gets loose really adds more dimension to her apart from loud bratty bad guy. I know I'm just focusing on the little things, but for me its the little things and details that build up a cool story.
That said, it seems the rigors of the tournament is bleeding into the quality of the work. Rally! Get yourself back to that round one caliber quality!
TEAM RHIMZEE- Ugh those colors, SO GOOD. Honestly from the thumbnails alone, I got such a lovely cohesive color story from beginning to end. Opening up these pages did not disappoint- and AH HA! I was right, there was a little Capgras lurkin round in there. Nice in-void easter egg and what could it meeeeeean? :DD
I loved the build up to cheering Lalala on. Totally cut from a concert anime- even in her "Everyone.." lines, but it wasn't cheesy. Just the right amount of garnish to make it a familiar nod that made me smile.
There really would be no way to kill this opponent and come out the other side with a likable protagonist, so the decision to have her self sacrifice was not only clever, but a very heroic, if not bittersweet ending. Still though, I miss the brash and bratty personality Desicat forged in round one here. We only got a halfhearted swat of a newspaper. Where's your opponents fire?
# 9
Posted:
Apr 4 2018, 08:19 PM
Team DesiCats: Hm, there seems to be a quality dip in this comic from the last one, otherwise entertaining and such but the drop is noticeable
Team ZeeRhim: As expected, you threw down the gold standard once more Just keep being
Team ZeeRhim: As expected, you threw down the gold standard once more Just keep being
# 8
Posted:
Apr 2 2018, 05:18 PM
Desicat: You guys work very well together. It's funny since you guys entered Void around the same time too. There's something about the quality of the lines that bugs me where it could be smoother. I don't know whether it's a bad brush tool or that you're simply working in a low DPI? Always work in high resolution. I find it funny that the glitter is less pronounced here given Desi's penchant for glittery highlights. I find it too small here and they could be a bit more pronounced? I enjoyed the expressiveness of your character here. It's very fun to watch that exaggerated emotion. The only place where it falters for me is page 11. Azure's expression doesn't seem right to me for someone witnessing their brother get torn in two. I think it needed a bit more horror to their expression. Great work though guys.
Zeewill: It is hard for me to judge your comics. I think they are an impressive cut. Fun ideas and creative storytelling. The only thing I feel I can suggest is for you guys to try to push yourselves creatively and keep up the quality.
Zeewill: It is hard for me to judge your comics. I think they are an impressive cut. Fun ideas and creative storytelling. The only thing I feel I can suggest is for you guys to try to push yourselves creatively and keep up the quality.
# 6
Posted:
Mar 30 2018, 10:27 AM
Good job Cat, I'm proud of what we got out here!
Zee and Rhim!!! Ahmigosh this is so beautiful a comic like gosh, the screaming crowds are amazing, Lala is amazing, your adorable children are amazing!!! Gosh there's so much I love about this comic, and like yeah I'm so happy to have gotten the opportunity to fight you guys!
That moment when you find out Lala's true nature was amazing, THE BUNNIES HAVE CORRUPTED HER!!! And when the crowd is awkwardly cheering her on, ohmigosh its so so so good! I love how you guys put her in your comic, its clear you made her fit seamlessly with the world... Or should I say universe you've created! The colors are absolutely amazing as always, I especially love the glow type feel you see going on in the fifth page! It was so cute when they defeated the rabbit overlords!
Lala is such a hero in your guys's comic, tis beautiful!
Zee and Rhim!!! Ahmigosh this is so beautiful a comic like gosh, the screaming crowds are amazing, Lala is amazing, your adorable children are amazing!!! Gosh there's so much I love about this comic, and like yeah I'm so happy to have gotten the opportunity to fight you guys!
That moment when you find out Lala's true nature was amazing, THE BUNNIES HAVE CORRUPTED HER!!! And when the crowd is awkwardly cheering her on, ohmigosh its so so so good! I love how you guys put her in your comic, its clear you made her fit seamlessly with the world... Or should I say universe you've created! The colors are absolutely amazing as always, I especially love the glow type feel you see going on in the fifth page! It was so cute when they defeated the rabbit overlords!
Lala is such a hero in your guys's comic, tis beautiful!
# 5
Posted:
Mar 30 2018, 09:04 AM
Desicat - ahhhhhhh you've done really well with the character personalities! I love the writing in this and that last page was a bit goosebumpy. I like knowing how the bunnies are made! I wish some of the colors had gotten darker and more intense on your more action pages to shift the tone, but overall I loved this.
Zeewill- WHY MUST YOU MAKE ME CRY!?! I don't even know what to say anymore!?!?
Zeewill- WHY MUST YOU MAKE ME CRY!?! I don't even know what to say anymore!?!?
# 4
Posted:
Mar 30 2018, 08:54 AM
Both of these comics came out genuinely pretty damned good. Be proud, the lot of ya.
Desi and Cats: As to be expected, this is a cute comic. The linework and forms can be a bit loose, but you play it off well by having exaggerated and cartoonish emotions and movements, and it blends very well together. Speaking of cartoonish, y'all even have the little gif in there. It's a nice touch, but the movement of the eyes feels a little off. Eyes move in a very snappy manner. The speed of them here is a little off, and I'll admit it might have been better as a still image. Or even better, letting us see the room from Lalala's perspective! Nothing sells a moment of fear or panic, like letting the reader see it how the character views a scene. It can also be a fun way to vary up your camera angles on occasion! Y'all do a great job of playing of Lalala's bratty, childish nature, and it's a lot of fun.
A very strong showing overall. Maybe just a bit more stuff in the background to fill out the scenes, but good nonetheless!
Zee and Rhim: Visually fantastic! There's really not a lot of negatives to be had, this comic works very well for itself. You continue to push the narrative you're building with the character, while also giving us a more grounded and "human" side to Azure. And you also do one of my favorite things death tournaments can encourage. You reinvent the opponents character for your narrative. It's a bold move a lot of people are too nervous to take, but it's executed well, because you've made it so this comic couldn't happen with anyone else. It's a role that can only be filled by the Lalala you wrote. The only nitpick I have is I wish y'all had kept up the interesting lighting like in the first page! Stage lights are bright and intense, but the lighting feels no stronger than the scenes backstage. Especially with the nature of a concert, I just feel like it was a missed opportunity to play with stronger, more impactful lighting and color schemes to enforce the mood, and would have really helped sell the tension in the scene.
Great work visually, solid work narratively, I just wish y'all had pushed it even further beyond after the taste of fun colors and lights the first page gave!
Desi and Cats: As to be expected, this is a cute comic. The linework and forms can be a bit loose, but you play it off well by having exaggerated and cartoonish emotions and movements, and it blends very well together. Speaking of cartoonish, y'all even have the little gif in there. It's a nice touch, but the movement of the eyes feels a little off. Eyes move in a very snappy manner. The speed of them here is a little off, and I'll admit it might have been better as a still image. Or even better, letting us see the room from Lalala's perspective! Nothing sells a moment of fear or panic, like letting the reader see it how the character views a scene. It can also be a fun way to vary up your camera angles on occasion! Y'all do a great job of playing of Lalala's bratty, childish nature, and it's a lot of fun.
A very strong showing overall. Maybe just a bit more stuff in the background to fill out the scenes, but good nonetheless!
Zee and Rhim: Visually fantastic! There's really not a lot of negatives to be had, this comic works very well for itself. You continue to push the narrative you're building with the character, while also giving us a more grounded and "human" side to Azure. And you also do one of my favorite things death tournaments can encourage. You reinvent the opponents character for your narrative. It's a bold move a lot of people are too nervous to take, but it's executed well, because you've made it so this comic couldn't happen with anyone else. It's a role that can only be filled by the Lalala you wrote. The only nitpick I have is I wish y'all had kept up the interesting lighting like in the first page! Stage lights are bright and intense, but the lighting feels no stronger than the scenes backstage. Especially with the nature of a concert, I just feel like it was a missed opportunity to play with stronger, more impactful lighting and color schemes to enforce the mood, and would have really helped sell the tension in the scene.
Great work visually, solid work narratively, I just wish y'all had pushed it even further beyond after the taste of fun colors and lights the first page gave!
# 3
Posted:
Mar 30 2018, 07:59 AM
Oh my god they're both fantastic
# 2
Posted:
Mar 15 2018, 09:20 PM
Best of luck you guys, can't wait to see how this goes!
# 1
Posted:
Mar 15 2018, 03:56 PM
OH NO LOL this is ALSO gonna be really cute!
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And thanks to Desi and Cat for this awesome round! Lalala was so much fun, I really, really enjoyed both making and reading these comics!