2016 Invitational: Round 2 / Deathwish vs. Dawa
Critiques & Comments
# 8
Posted:
Jul 20 2016, 03:51 AM
Congrats, Soot. Good luck in the upcoming round.
# 7
Posted:
Jul 13 2016, 05:37 PM
Sloppybottom: oh that... that got dark (as is fitting this character I suppose). That bit of grey really helps give presence, and your lines look stronger this time around, too! While those first four pages are a well done bit of storytelling, you probably should have cut it down so you could at least block in Dawa's part of the story. You probably could have made sure that part got done first. It's best to have the meat of your story and your money shots done first so at least the parts that truly need to be there are there.
Sootball: Those opening pages cracked me up! In a way, yours can pick up where Sloppybottom's left off! It could always be stronger, but you do a good job of having settings, different camera angles and types of action and staging to tell an entertaining story.
Sootball: Those opening pages cracked me up! In a way, yours can pick up where Sloppybottom's left off! It could always be stronger, but you do a good job of having settings, different camera angles and types of action and staging to tell an entertaining story.
# 6
Posted:
Jul 13 2016, 03:11 PM
@Sootball I loved your portrayal of Deathwish! The similarities between our stories are indeed striking. I appreciate how much time you spent with my character, and I just want to apologize for how little Dawa is in my comic. I planned at least two more pages and life got in the way.
@PyrasTerran The reason the bear is shaped, sized, and posed that way is because so far all of my covers have been direct references to Marvel #1 issues. Since you're so familiar with google images you should be able to look up the first issue of The Incredible Hulk. Really loved your most recent heavy weights by the way.
@PyrasTerran The reason the bear is shaped, sized, and posed that way is because so far all of my covers have been direct references to Marvel #1 issues. Since you're so familiar with google images you should be able to look up the first issue of The Incredible Hulk. Really loved your most recent heavy weights by the way.
# 5
Posted:
Jul 13 2016, 02:00 PM
Sloppybottom: If you're not sure how to draw a bear's body, it never ever hurts to simply google image some bears! In this age of the internet references are your friend and readily available. This guy's plight is complex and provocative, or it can be, but there's one thing I would like to see more of: Actual on-page reasons for why he's suicidal (without reading the bio, most would have no clue). It looks like you couldn't finish your story and that's a shame, but, (and this is something I've noticed with a lot of members this round, not just you) you should try to include both characters together much sooner to avoid this from happening in the future. The therapist scene is powerful but doesn't do enough for how this will lead to the interaction between Deathwish and Dawa, what's more it brings up more questions than it should (how is he not locked up for stabbing a therapist??)
Sootball: We've got a complete story with a beginning middle and end and that's one of the things I appreciate most about this comic. Obvi I found it pretty funny too! It's a shame that time got away from you, and these pages aren't more complete, but they're ALOT more finished than last round and we can see each and every thing that's going on quite clearly so that's a step up! Some of your figures are a bit stiff so you wanna practice drawing more and more, not just during the comic drawing time but outside of it, practice drawing full figures, you'll get faster and faster at it and they're feel looser and more vibrant. For your next comic the goal will be to fully finish all your pages
Sootball: We've got a complete story with a beginning middle and end and that's one of the things I appreciate most about this comic. Obvi I found it pretty funny too! It's a shame that time got away from you, and these pages aren't more complete, but they're ALOT more finished than last round and we can see each and every thing that's going on quite clearly so that's a step up! Some of your figures are a bit stiff so you wanna practice drawing more and more, not just during the comic drawing time but outside of it, practice drawing full figures, you'll get faster and faster at it and they're feel looser and more vibrant. For your next comic the goal will be to fully finish all your pages
# 4
Posted:
Jul 13 2016, 08:41 AM
Ha ha, cool stuff, Slop. It's really cool to see the parallels in our ideas for this one!
# 3
Posted:
Jul 7 2016, 08:52 AM
Yeeeah, git sum!
# 2
Posted:
Jul 6 2016, 01:07 PM
Woo, me too~
# 1
Posted:
Jul 6 2016, 12:26 PM
I am stoked on this
Tournament Match
Drawing Time:
1 week
Ended:
Jul 19th, 2016
Votes Cast:
33
Page Views:
1700
Winner:
Sootball
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