Paavo Lawson vs. Gangsta Geeta

Paavo Lawson vs. Gangsta Geeta

Paavo Lawson vs. Gangsta Geeta

by Dechado

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Dechado
Artist
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227 comments
# 13   Posted: Apr 30 2016, 05:17 PM
I enjoyed the read, and I am honestly happy to see you continue your story with characters like Jessie. I don't know, it's a thing I like where all the characters are tied somehow.

I'm glad Geeta finally found her daughter. Can't wait for the next comic of her. :)

Elyan
Artist
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72 comments
# 12   Posted: Apr 24 2016, 02:33 AM
i second what DNO and radji said. great comeback and i really like that you propel your actual story about geetas daugther forward. though ...
i feel like the conversation is a little of. its almost like you intended to give the impression of a C movie writing or some deadpoolish reference (nice super hero landing ;) ) but the conversation about paavo was a little rushed and forced for my liking. geetas sarcasm in page 2 doesnt really come through given your cameo character didnt even properly said one line. it works but feels rushed. my suggestion but in a little more exchange and intelinput and it hooks the reader better.

you made great use of the colour palette to set the mood. the colour choice in last panels tank is maybe not best but it works. you could have chosen another liquid colour to pop her daughter out more visually.

as for visuals again. paavo would probably have provited of a little calmer expression set before the labscene. he looks like hes fit to rip their heads off instead of peacefully leading them the way. it might have strengthened the mood change in the lab scene when he goes berserk :)

overall its still one hell of an outcome.
10 proper pages in 3 weeks is great even for many more experienced members.
so whatever crit there is its really shadowed over by the sheer amount of content you brought up so quick.
keep up the good work

Radji
Artist
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518 comments
# 11   Posted: Apr 21 2016, 11:06 PM
MB: that's one hell of a comeback, and waell constructed story, it was fun to read. The font was... okay? Just choose a straighter one in the future. background and colors are okay too, very good facial expressions, i can't wait to see more of Geeta !

Elge: WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY !?

Heathen
Artist
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303 comments
# 10   Posted: Apr 21 2016, 10:47 PM
MB: This is how you make a comeback.  10 totally solid, complete pages in 3 weeks.  Your backgrounds need work (pg 4, panel 3 was like, come on, dude lol) but your facial expressions are great, your action is dynamic and very readable, and you nailed the likenesses, I recognized Jesse Valley instantly.

  Ditch that font, though, it's no good.  And keep it all the same size, unless someone's screaming maybe, but don't make font bigger or smaller to fit the panels, just put more thought into your balloon and art placement.  Also, a little pose reference can be a good thing - pg 7, panel 4 made me laugh because Geeta's leg is coming out of her ass.  But now I'm nitpicking, because I got the action, and it is a tricky pose.  

Overall, nice work.  Favorite parts are the opening rooftop jump, your quick and punchy dialogue, that transformation scene, and the big character progression ending.  Can't wait to see the next issue.

Elge: Tsk.

I only had enough energy for one tsk.  


MyHatsEatPeople
Artist
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393 comments
# 9   Posted: Apr 21 2016, 04:23 PM
Ellllllggggeeee

merlinsbeard
Artist
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17 comments
# 8   Posted: Apr 19 2016, 03:33 PM
elge:
merlinsbeard: Holy crap that was intense! Thanks for fighting me elge! I look forward to seeing your comics! I had a great time using your character and having Paavo be a part of my ongoing story. This is the hardest I've ever worked on a comic, I hope you guys like it!
Quote

Shit...

Now I feel bad about spilling the beans.
I had a terrible month, and had no emergy left to work on my comic at all.
So. Whoops. Sorry, I messed up.

I can probably manage some Splash art. Lesse...
Quote

Sorry to hear that man. Hope you're doing better now.

Dechado
Artist
icon
227 comments
# 7   Posted: Apr 19 2016, 02:37 PM
merlinsbeard: Holy crap that was intense! Thanks for fighting me elge! I look forward to seeing your comics! I had a great time using your character and having Paavo be a part of my ongoing story. This is the hardest I've ever worked on a comic, I hope you guys like it!
Quote

Shit...

Now I feel bad about spilling the beans.
I had a terrible month, and had no emergy left to work on my comic at all.
So. Whoops. Sorry, I messed up.

I can probably manage some Splash art. Lesse...

merlinsbeard
Artist
icon
17 comments
# 6   Posted: Apr 19 2016, 06:07 AM
Holy crap that was intense! Thanks for fighting me elge! I look forward to seeing your comics! I had a great time using your character and having Paavo be a part of my ongoing story. This is the hardest I've ever worked on a comic, I hope you guys like it!

Rikun
Artist
icon
71 comments
# 5   Posted: Apr 12 2016, 08:46 PM
Sweet dude! Let's see what you've got!

JCee
Artist
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364 comments
# 4   Posted: Apr 3 2016, 11:55 PM
Best of luck! Can't wait to see this one.

E.W. Schneider
Artist
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1055 comments
# 3   Posted: Mar 30 2016, 05:36 PM
Good luck, hope you both do great work!

Shen
Global Moderator
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1276 comments
# 2   Posted: Mar 30 2016, 03:27 PM
oh awesome!! good luck, cant wait to read!

Radji
Artist
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518 comments
# 1   Posted: Mar 30 2016, 03:06 PM
*angel chorus* MAKE IT HAPPEN !!!

Comic Details -

 
Drawing Time: 3 weeks
Ended: Apr 27th, 2016
Votes Cast: 11
Page Views: 935
Winner: merlinsbeard
 

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