Short and Sweet: Black and Blue

Short and Sweet: Black and Blue

Short and Sweet: Black and Blue

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Critiques & Comments
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Wei Ingnan
Artist
597 comments
# 115   Posted: Sep 13 2014, 10:57 AM
Monday:  Im sure everyone here learned a lot about TAKING THINGS OUT than putting things in if they had reached that point in their creation process and should use this struggle as a baseline for future battles.
Quote

I HOPE people learned a lot (or even a little) and will use it all of their future comics....by taking part or simply reading these efforts

Monday
Artist
933 comments
# 114   Posted: Sep 11 2014, 10:24 PM
Frak, I'm digging Evi's comic quite a lot mainly because in no real literal "words" did it try to explain the idea of the comic.

Having a really limited page count is a huge deal and a challenge that no one is used to. In void we're used to tunneling out a story out of the pages we make, but here everything seems crazy intentional and flows well.  The idea leaves a LOT for me to imagine and that's exactly what you want to do with comics and raw ideas that are edited simply and concisely. Im sure everyone here learned a lot about TAKING THINGS OUT than putting things in if they had reached that point in their creation process and should use this struggle as a baseline for future battles.

Evi
Artist
110 comments
# 113   Posted: Sep 10 2014, 07:34 PM
Those that submitted, great job guys! It was really interesting to see how all of you took the theme of Black and Blue differently. I'll try to do a crit on each in a later post

Ahhhh and Thank you so much for the feedback on my entry! Like, I was super worried about my writing since it was a rather indirect way to tell a story inside this world I've established... I took a whole lot of steps to make sure that things made enough sense in a span of 5 pages and I'm so glad that paid off ;_;

Otakutaylor - Gosh I am so happy to hear that. You know that phase when you stare at a project for so long you "forget" how it would feel in front of a fresh pair of eyes? That was me. My doubts started to fade away when I read your comment. It's just so magical to hear people's reactions reading it for the first time! Thank you.
I definitely saw the pixellation around the speech bubbles but ended up not having time to fix them, I'm glad it wasn't too distracting.

Wei - Spot on, those were exactly the parts I had more trouble with, haha.
Thank you for the suggestions on the inks, I can see having more blacks would certainly make them pop out more, I guess I will have to experiment to see how I can make it work.
Definitely wish I had more time to look for a font that suited the mood more! I did the lettering last with not much time to spare and that probably was not the best idea.
and Wei, Thank you for organizing this tournament. The requirements were a real challenge and it forced me to think so differently. Honestly I would have dragged the thing into 10 pages under normal circumstances but now I feel like I've proven to myself that I can condense things without sacrificing too much of the story and pacing. It's a great feeling.

Puzzle: I don't remember if I have said this before, but I love your critiques man, all the way back to the ones you've made since Prettiest Princess, They have always been super sweet and helpful <3 Thank youuu
You are totally right about my lines, I used a slightly different method from my usual inking and so I wasn't as confident... I have to confess actually sharpened the lines a little while I was exporting the pages, but I totally see what you mean.
and the forest! Thanks for the tips, backgrounds are definitely a thing I need to work on, especially outdoorsy spaces. Gotta keep practicinggg

Thanks again everyone!

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 112   Posted: Sep 10 2014, 05:04 AM
Thanks Puzzlething!  Sadly my brushpen that I used during the Prettiest Princess tournament got snatched and abused by my daughter Alita.  I have not replaced it yet.  (I'm taking recommendations.)  What I used here is more like a nib pen that functions with a cartridge (which I noticed last night was nearly out of ink, silly me).  Seems like I use a different tool every time I come back to Void.

I agree with you about the faces, and I know what's causing that.  I just don't look at them enough.  I guess I'm doing family portraits in the near future for practice.

I was obsessed with horses as a kid, so I've had a lot of practice.

Wubble
Think Tank
91 comments
# 111   Posted: Sep 10 2014, 03:19 AM
Thanks for the critiques~ Next comic I'll be doing will be.. an actual comic (compared to this).

I'm actually a little sad most of you didn't realize that the first three pages definitely were not just random backgrounds. The first page is Oort's Cloud, next up is Pluto, Jupiter and that's the Moon where you can see the old cockpit. If you still didn't put it together - we were closing in on Terra each page. I hoped I didn't have to make it obvious, but it seems I should've.

Puzzlething
Artist
457 comments
# 110   Posted: Sep 9 2014, 11:04 PM
   Everyone              -

                         I'm gonna put this separate, in the hope you guys all see this.

                       When I came up with the idea of the Short and Sweet event, it was about showcasing excellence. That with enough time, and thought, and care, you guys could turn out work that would delight and surprise everybody, most of all yourselves. And oh my god, you guys delivered like I couldn't believe. The art you guys created is not only beautiful, and at the height of your abilities, but so much of it was ambitious. You drew things you've never drawn before, told us your stories in completely new ways.

                        If you didn't finish your comic or didn't turn one in, that's okay. It's easy to forget that drawing and telling stories is hard, draining, time consuming work. You shouldn't feel bad though. Because while feeling bad is the way alot of us get stuff done and get motivated, there are better ways. You can look at the fearlessness and growth of these artists here, and know they're just like you. You can do it, you just need to keep moving.

                      I think I already said it, but I'm too tired to go look, so I'll just say it again. Great work everybody, you should all be super proud of yourselves!!!!!!

Puzzlething
Artist
457 comments
# 109   Posted: Sep 9 2014, 10:39 PM
Atomic               -

                I think the aesthetic you were going for here was incredibly cool. The way the pencils and watercolours mix with the letter pieces is amazing. You put real thought into your visual approach and it's amazing. There are a few things I would've done differently to maybe push it a bit more.

            First off, I think you needed the page to look a little cleaner. Some aesthetic smudging here and there is definitely a great way to have it fit with the letter pieces, but I think you could've played with the levels just a little bit, and made up for the lack of heavy smudging with maybe some intentional drips of paint. There's so little white on the page that it takes away some of the strength of your line making.

          I also think you should've dropped some more heavy, clarifying lines. It's a good way to draw the viewer's attention to things you want them to notice, and preserve the movement and composition in the page while still having alot of little sketchy lines. It looks like you did a little bit of that with a pen, but I both think you didn't do it enough, and that a pen was the wrong decision. Inking at the very end with a slightly chunkier, heavy pencil would've meshed way better with what you were going for.

           Graphite and watercolor is just heartbreakingly beautiful. I'm completely terrified to try it, even though I want to so much. It's a lovely comic, and I can't say enough how much I enjoy the harmony in your illustration.


Fed            -

           I think you could also play with your levels a little bit. Not to get rid of the mark making in your solid blacks, but just to get everything darker and sharper.

          Your story also feels like it ends kinda abruptly. I was totally waiting for them to end up at Ozzy!

          The shots and framing on the third page is also kinda the calmest and most separate from the action, which totally doesn't fit. There are a lot of panels, but everything is shot strait on and isolated. The alien is supposed to be really big, so you really could have used some 3 point perspective in there to sell that. Also, up until this point your background was simple, but it was totally serviceable enough to keep me feeling like everything was grounded in a real place. But by the third page, it's just a white void, which sucks because you have the opportunity to add so many things to the setting at that point. Fire, explosions, debris; they could all make that page way more interesting.

            Overall I like the space-americana type story, and the art, it just feels like you ran out of time and had to wrap it up as quickly as possible.


Rob             -

             You should've used that blue light on your backgrounds as well as your characters. Really, just using multiple tones of blue in the background would've been much better. It would have allowed you to control the light to evoke different moods, make space easier to see, and create visual interest. I don't think it harms your visual metaphor to make the world look a little more 3 dimensional. Without any sort of texture lines, you really needed something back there to break up those spaces.

            It's a very cute comic. The circle effect here reminds me a little of bokeh. Your choice to use alot of orange was super smart, it contrasts the blue wonderfully, and that's especially great since it's an important part of the narrative that it contrasts the blue so much.


Ryzel             -

               Asfasdpijasdpijfajpiwafjpiwaf noooooo dude whyyyyyyyyyy


Sean             -

              >: I


Shen            -

             If you're going to establish a light source as very coloured, like the fire, you can't just paint a stroke of red in the light form. Every bit of light in that scene should be tinted red, and it's going to majorly effect how colours interact. In a scene like that, where shadows are kinda non-existent and the light form is much more important, I find it easier to work from dark-to-light. Flat the scene in dark, muted colours, and then paint your hot lights on top. It makes it easier to think about how the light flows over things, and might make it easier to think of the light as a colour on top of the form, not just as a window through the shadow to whatever colour the form should be.

      It's a gorgeous comic dude, I actually think it's my favorite you're ever done. The leaps and bounds you've made in colour are amazing. The way you move through the story, flowing in and out the panels, creates the perfect sense of an ambigous timeframe, the same way a good fireside storyteller does. I particularly love love love love the underwater scenes, and all those pretty dappled lights.


Evi                -

            Gooddddaaaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmmmmnnnnnn. DUDE. I LOVE THIS COMIC SO GODDAMN MUCH. Like, sure there are problems, like the lines could be more confident, and you really need to turn on at least a little anti-aliasing. Seriously those lines look hella digital. Also, the forest doesn't really have a great sense of space. When the viewer reaches the trees it just feels like a wall, or maybe line of trees a few feet thick. You need some more intense atmospheric perspective, give a real feel of mysterious depths to that forest. You could try colourizing the line art of the trees that are further back too, so that they fade into the distance a little.

           BUT SERIOUSLY!? I had a hard time sitting down to find that stuff, because it's so beautiful. Like it's everything is wonderful. That muted palette, the tone of the narrative, just aAhashfaieufaefhuawafwawfu. I don't want peeps to feel bad, because so many people drew amazing comics for this event, but this is totes my favorite. Amazing work Evi!


Jetster           -

               like you guys might think I'm not actually upset but I totes am. why don't i get more awesome comics ;_;


Nibbles         -

               Your line art gets really scratchy in spots, which is weird, because I always associate your stuff with beautiful line art. I still remember those brush ink comics you did. If you're going to uses a kinda scratchy tool like this, I think you need to totally embrace it and give us some nice texture. Just tiny hatchings eveerrryyyywhereeee. As it is the comic feels really bare and empty.

               I feel like the weakest part of your art is faces, just because you treat them as totally flat things. I totally get using simplier faces, and I think it fits will with the feeling of innocence alot of your characters have. It always kinda reminds of Miyazaki. But I think by simplfying the geometry of the face, as well as it's features, you make them stick out and feel awkward, especially next to how well illustrated everything else is in your comics. You can only get more expressive and charming faces by adding that stuff. And judging by your skills, I think your totally capable of adding dimension to your character's features.

            Also, that kelpie design is sick as hell omg. You're just the best are drawing horses jesus christ.


Crafty             -

                 I don't like how the panels are all sorta floating around on the page. They feel too separate, it messes with the pacing. I think you coulda totally put the panels closer together and kept them feeling like separate moments, either by reducing the amount of white you use in an actual panel (so that you get a sorta box there) or by using tape or frisket to create more defined barriers at the edges of panels (and letting suggestion create the boxes).

                   That's like my only criticism though, this comic is way cute. I love the character designs and the way you draw your expressions. The people with the big triangle noses all remind me of cartoon moles, they're adorable. I love watercolor, your making me wanna break out my own and stop using digital ;_;. Those colours are so so nice, and man, that one shot of them walking through the forest is super charming. I love the little markings for the bark and mushrooms, and the natural way you let the landscape undulate.


Momo               -

                *OPEN WEEPING*


Wu at-at               -

                     The shots of space really don't do it for me, especially as it's just text on one large image each. Why not show us the things you're talking about here? This seems like a story about memories, about nostalgia. Why don't you show us those memories, that story, those feelings. There's no narrative in that void of space. What is that red nebula supposed to mean? Or that gas giant? It doesn't add anything to the words other than being fancy paper stock.

                    The colours of space were very pretty though. I like that you didn't just go with any one solid colour, and really played around with subtle shifts in tone and value.


BoboboboboboBoboboboboboboboBOBO bob           -

                             The story feels a little difficult to parse. I think it's supposed to be a classic sort of cutesy "Oh he picked up my pencil for me, he does like me <3" thing, but a few things confuse that for me. I think the panel of him throwing a *something* is supposed to be from some other time (since he's wearing a different shirt) showing the main character watching him. But his shirt is the only visual clue you added to suggest that that scene maybe took place at some other time. Other than that it's illustrated exactly the same as every other sorta-panel. The first few times reading through, I was really confused as to what was actually going on in that room. I still feel as though I might be very wrong. I also think in general you could've made these characters more expressive, especially because this is a silent comic. You're totes great at expressions too, so I know you can do it!

                        I think your like one of the only people I know that's really good at crowd shots. God I hate doing them so much, I just want to claw my eyes out of my head from boredom. But you put so much care into them. You create all this unique characters that'll only get seen for a moment before you move onto the next scene.  Except that's not actually true, because I often see you carry characters from a crowd through panels, telling their story in the background. Ugggasdasdwwdhhhh, I love that stuff so much.


RoboSockMonkey                     -

                                     The stuff in the background really doesn't look that far away, and often times looks a little too simple. Like those mountains in the first panel are like super smooth, and there's not alot of atmospheric perspective on them. The horizon is also high enough that they're actually quite close to him. There's not much space between him and where the first mountains start. They end up feeling more like large dirt piles. The landscape in the second panel is better, but the land at the base of the mountain is incredibly vague, and it feels more like you just didn't know how to simply illustrate that valley. The biggest problem with both the first mountain range and the valley is that you didn't include the right small details. With just a few descriptive lines, you could've planted the suggestion needed to transform some vague shapes into forests or ravines or crags.

                                  While it definitely looks like it was done quickly, you have such a monstrous amount of drafting ability that it feels amazing. You have such great shapes and action. Nothing feels wasted or unimportant. That Oni face especially is so sweet, holy shit. I really really love that guy.

otakutaylor
Artist
179 comments
# 108   Posted: Sep 9 2014, 03:45 PM
Thanks for all the amazing critiques and comments guys~ This was definitely the hardest comic I've drawn so far, and although I tried a lot of new things (not all of which worked) I'm really glad about how it came out. That said, it's plenty obvious I managed to leave out a few details of the story again... Gosh darn it I need to get someone to proof read these before I start inking them. Hehe. I don't normally want to explain a comic, because if I have to explain it, it kind of failed at its job. But since some of the confusing is because I remembered the research I did and forgot not everyone knows this stuff, I'll clear up a few inconsistencies.

Boring spoilers - The Mission is intended to be capturing the comet, namely into the cargo hold, so that it won't disintegrate on atmospheric entry. The Karman line is about 62 miles up and is generally agreed to be the line between earths atmosphere and space (although that's just where it is visible to us) It's where auroras happen and because of that interferes with all sorts of electronic devices, which was why they had to send a person up to sacrifice herself, instead of remote control or a robot.

As for the art, I can see now thanks to all of your comments what I should have done differently, Cut page 3 in half and added a bit of the above explanation so you knew what was going on. And with that I could probably make page 5's impact into two panels, and shortened the boring speech or removed it entirely. I am appreciative that people enjoyed my use of theme, though yeah... saying black and blue twice like that was really ham fisted of me. heheh. I'm gonna need to work on coloring a lot more, as is obvious I'm not too used to real color blending. I've a real habit of zooming farther out than the document's final size when I draw, which leads to all those little bumps and line errors that I don't see till after I zoom back in. D'oh. Gotta work on that.

I'm hoping to get back to Tsumi comics sometime soon, and can't wait to put what I've learned here to use!

Gregly
Artist
125 comments
# 107   Posted: Sep 9 2014, 02:29 PM
Mints: I love the amount of detail in your pages, it definitely looks like you spent most of the four weeks working on these. Good framing and action but I think you could have broken those borders a bit more... And the time you did the perspective on the heli is kinda off.

Slade: good emotion but I think you could have done more with these pages... The Wikipedia screenshots stand out.

Liz: good pages but lots of close ups with no bgs... I like your colors other than blue, that pink dragon is funny! Your panel borders are all pretty straight and could have used some more diagonals in the action-y parts but I know you were moving across the country so good job finishing.

Taylor: you said about how it's super blended, I agree... But I was confused a bit. Is she going up to slam into that asteroid? I felt she doesn't need to be in there since her ship flew itself that little bit. I guess I didn't really get the point, but you put lots and lots of work into the art which is good (even I it was a bit too much)

NRG: too bad you couldn't finish that last page... It just kind of ends though and it feels like there should have been one or two more pages. The most interesting character was the one selling the juice but he's out after the first page. Maybe he could have stopped the beat down?

DeathlySilent: cute kitties, but I really like your backgrounds in this! Nice concise comic.

Fern: whoa! Mostly good but some panels on pages 2-3 fell a bit flat for me. Really nice controlled watercolors, I'm jealous!

Atomic: good showing, I think you did a fine job drawing teenagers even though you said it was hard. The comic ends quickly but I know you've Had a lot going on.

Fed: good to see you back I like the way you draw. There should have been more blacks on the pages but I like some of the details and the rhyming.

Rob: it looks like you rushed this but the color spreading was a nice effect. You need to spend more time sketching and getting the poses down before you start inking.

Shen: good story but it was a bit too long for five pages. It seemed weird to me that the river attacked those guys for no reason... Menana must have been crying a whole lot. You put a lot of work into this I can see and I like the ambient effects and nice touches, like the sun shining through the water in the last panel.

Evi: good stuff! I like birds so this was a good one for me, I like their dialogue. This reads like the hook to a longer story... I want to read more!

Nibbles: I like the story but your art was inconsistent... Some places are far more detailed than others. Your entry definitely would be stronger with color.

Crafty: you're just getting better and better. Nice colors, story, designs and backgrounds! I'll edit this if I come up with a critique...

Wutata: interesting idea but it falls a little flat... There needs to be more here.

Bobo: hard to follow, could have used colors or word bubbles (maybe?) but I know you started late. Nice work getting what you have done in such short time.

RSM: cool story and I like the mood of the art, but I really wish we could have seen more of the fight, maybe one more page worth. You could have soured up the art a little more since you only had three pages, but I still like this.

Everyone: sorry I defaulted, I have excuses but I won't make them. Sorry for being part of all his grief!

Hobbittastic
Artist
164 comments
# 106   Posted: Sep 9 2014, 01:50 PM
Hey hey! Look at these comics! I'm so proud; we made it!!

Thank you everyone so much for your comments- I take them seriously.

The bubbles, this time, were done with the oval tool because they weren't so much speech bubbles as they were narration- which is why I didn't draw them the same as I usually do. That's why there is no tail going to anyone's mouth or anything.

The elf guy is suppose to be the love interest- which is why marriage is mentioned on the first page and he repeats being a support for her.

Also backgrounds and I have a very love/hate relationship and I swear I do try and work on them; I really need to improve on backgrounds for sure. It's more I used to never draw them so the practice I do have is only recently, so I need more time to improve. Personally, I like to have a simple design but I need work on the difference between "simple" and "lacking". I'm not ignoring your needs for scenery!

I think adapting a long story into 5 pages wasn't the best because it felt a lot of plot holes. All the story problem comments can be answered with "if I had more pages, I could have explained- - -" which is my fault for picking an adaptation like this. There were so many cool monsters and characters I had to skip over so I picked the obvious choice (the dragon). Was hoping the story was vague enough to work with such little page count, but I'll know better next time :)

Puzzlething
Artist
457 comments
# 105   Posted: Sep 8 2014, 06:57 PM
Okay! More cawmix!

OtakuTaylor            -

                         I've never been very into using soft brushes for digital painting. It might just be a personal prejudice of mine, but have you ever tried using a hard edged brush and then turning the flow down to like 10% I feel like it looks a lot better. It lets you work soft, but pull in hard edges and line making when you need to. As it is, everything feels overwhelmingly smooth and soft.

                        Also, I see your line getting hairy in a few spots, you need to be careful with that. The way lines over lap is such an incredibly effective way to illustrate so many shifts in form but your viewer won't be able to notice intentional overlaps when you have accidental ones sprinkled about.

                       This was an incredibly ambitious comic dude. It's amazing how hard you worked to have what feels like an almost entirely panel-less comic. You really pushed what you were capable of and tackled something that must've been incredibly intimidating. Every page is filled with amazingly creative solutions. And I think you're Black and Blue tie-in was definitely one the most graceful and natural. That line just fit perfectly.


Bent              -

          ;_;


NRG                -

               You could really work on your line quality dude. Like, every line is really wobbly, and you're definitely sawing away at the page to get your final lines. You need to move your hand quickly and with confidence, put down the one line where it needs to be. If you're not confident where that lines needs to be, go back to your sketch and figure it out. Don't move away from your pencils until you know exactly what's going on. When you practice still lives (which you still totally need to be doing dude, build those fundamentals) try to keep your eye on the subject matter as much as possible. Let your hands react to what your eyes see. Try drawing with your shoulder, elbows and wrist, but not your fingers. Just use them to hold the tool.

              I liked the comic dude! Do people actually drink blueberry juice? Isn't that like way too sweet to drink?


KENT               -

             KENT KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN NTTTTTTTTTTT


Deathly Silent                 -

                               Everytime you use 1 point perspective, which is alot, the tops and bottoms of everything just stop existing. Remember you gotta put your horizon line down and figure that stuff out. It makes everything look like flat stickers.

                               I actually thought the idea of using the three separate wallpaper patterns for the three scenes was pretty noice, though I totes think you missed the opportunity to use the stripey texture behind blackie-blue instead of that blue void. It was a cute comic, and oh man that person has like a million cats. I like the idea that even though they all live in the same house there's a cat he doesn't know about. Like the house is some giant magical kingdom ahahaha.

                             I also feel like your structure is really spot on in this comic. Usually your comics feel a little swimmy? Kinda like everything is moving a little? I don't know if that's a good way to explain it. But this feels super solid! The space and characters totally feel like they occupy a concrete space, it's wonderful.


Fern           -

             When you're doing large washes, like the night sky, get some water on the page first. Prep the area by painting just with water, then go back in there with your wash. It'll help to minimize the appearance of brush strokes, which can mess up the illusion of the sky existing far back in space.

            I also think you should've really mixed your palette up for the night scene. It's the middle of the night you've put so many bright colours on the characters. Her hair is like the same colour it was in the morning, and their skin doesn't seem to be in shadow at all.

          My favorite part of the comic is page 4 on. I really love how you were using your colour and what you did with the water. It seems like you start to use more colours in your washes and objects, and it feels like you really started to get the hang of the paint. So beautiful.


Symon           -

               Nooooooooo, dude was this your first comic?! I really wanted to see it! Don't give up, deadlines totally get easier to deal with, you just have to keep pushing.


SPK            -

            :C

Annnnd that's enough for tonight, I'll get to the rest tomorrow. Great work everybody!

RobThing
Artist
84 comments
# 104   Posted: Sep 8 2014, 01:48 PM
OTAKU - Yeh, I probably should have done more with the blue. I was going for bland, but I guess, I didn't need to be quite THAT bland.

ROBO - Yehhh okay, but like, it's a comic though! If you need to clarify, then you're doin' it wrong  ;)  Just like, a quick shot of sword-in-gut or something to make it obvious to the dumb ones like me.

MINTLEY - Yehhh, I suck, I totally forgot the shadows on the colory bits  =_=

NEENS - Yes. My lines suck and shakey and such. Working on that. WORKING SO HARD. They will continue to suck, but hopefully suck less as time goes by.

NIBBLES - Thats cool. Just like. More. More please?  I really, really like it.

DEATHLY - Ehh, I'm not complaining. I love cats. I am right there with Red and the cat parade. Yes.

FRED - Yes I am. So sappy. Totally your fault. You sweet, glorious bastard.

WEI -  Yes I do. So different. Rebel!  :D  Yes, much improvement. Improvement equal to amounts of canoodling, since cuddle-drawing is totally a thing (Although I love how it's my choice whether or not he poses nude, like, he doesn't get a say at all  xD). I am SO PLEASED that my execution has been so well-recieved because I came up with the idea and was like GOD DAMN THATS A GOOD--Oh fuck. How. How do I even... >.>   So it took me about a week to even figure out how to pull it off.
I have been working on my colors, I seem to enjoy mixing neon orange high-lights with dark blue shadows. We will see where that goes.

I can't wait to read Kent's comic. And while I'm a little disappointed that I out-gayed him,
I am also super pleased to be the master of short & sweet gayness.
Wooo!

Minteh
Artist
252 comments
# 103   Posted: Sep 8 2014, 01:47 PM
Wei- you totally caught me haha, I did so much planning and plotting, and then halfway through the period when I was about to start drawing I realized that my revised script didn't actually save.  The whole comic is literally done from what I remembered and drawn/inked within one week's time so it's super rough. The first page took so long and I wanted so bad to keep up the quality, but I felt like I wouldn't finish if I spent the same amount of time. I definitely tried some short cuts and suffered for it.

Puzzle- aw man, I totally added the halos post-production because I wasn't sure if they stood out enough.  That's also why it only happened in two spots, I didn't even think about the consistency, just whether or not the characters were 'forward' enough. I'm really trying to pull your commentary/suggestions into my backgrounds, from previous comics and current, so thank you for helping me improve!

Puzzlething
Artist
457 comments
# 102   Posted: Sep 8 2014, 12:49 PM
Ahhhhhh, hell yeah guys! Oh my god that's so many comics. I'm super sorry if I just repeat what other people say, I'm totes not gonna read all those comments haha. Way too lazy.


Ahmed          -

               noooooooooooooooooooo


Minty          -

              I hate it so much when people put white halos around character's to keep them separate from the background. I totally don't think it's necessary with you either dude, you seem to have a fine idea of how to use your line weights and stuff to keep the different planes separate. You don't even do it consistently either, and I'm not really sure why you make the choices to use halos when you do.

              The visuals are really cool. I love the effect of the gritty, heavy stone of the city being swallowed by the flower patches. It's a really fun aesthetic. In general the background is wonderful, I love all the small, unique touches. The best thing about cities is how filled of small stories they are, and you totes embrace that your settings. A small thing, but I've found that you can make distant windows feel less cartoony just by illustrating a few small details, like separate window panes, curtains, air conditioners, or even just a little line weight variation to suggest the thickness of the window.


Slaggle         -

               ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh


Slade            -

              I think your illustrations on the first page could've been a little more effective. Like at the bottom panel, give the shadowy figures more of a sense of weight, have them really push in and feel oppressive. Right now they just feel like they're kinda hanging around being jerks.  You also could have shifted the camera in closer to the main character, and shot up at the shadows with worms eye. That way we identify more with the main character, and you strengthen the feeling of oppression further.
           
            There are also some small problems with line quality on the second page. Your lines get a little wobbly and lose their dynamism. It only seems to happen on parts of the body where you have to be more precise, so I think it's just that you need to maintain your speed when inking. In spots like her hair, your line making is fast and confident because you're not worried about messing up the structure. You need to pull that attitude into your inking everywhere.

            Storywise I think you could've illustrated the main character feeling like it was too late in a more graceful/powerful way. The wikipedia copy-paste demolishes any sort of subtlety. You even had to highlight a section to make sure you were just strait-up telling us "Oh it's too late". You can totally use your art to make us feel that hopelessness.


Gregly        -

              T-T


Hobbittastic          -

                        There are certain spots where I feel like you overused soft brushes, like the waterful and doing some of the background effects. I just feel like they didn't mesh with how hard edged and graphic everything is. Everything from your style to your shading and gradients, it's all very clean, and it makes alot of the soft stuff stick out alot.

                        My only real story criticism is that the dragon feels almost incidental? You don't really show why she's fighting the dragon, and it's not really clear afterwards that defeating it allowed her access to the waterfall. Maybe if you'd introduced the idea of the waterfall before or as we see the Dragon. You could also have shown the dragon blocking the main character from the waterfall. Then afterwards when she starts talking about the rumor the reader would be like "Ohhhhhh, that's what that waterfall was" If the dragon is just supposed to represent general trials on her journey, I think showing a few struggles alongside it would have helped.

                       Your cartoony characters are always super cute, and you always have such lovely lines.



UGGGHHHHh, more later. This is getting kinda long.

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 101   Posted: Sep 8 2014, 10:20 AM
Thanks Wei!

And FYI, I was definitely not intending to color it.  My 15 year old wacom Graphire3 is unreliable as fuck and I wasn't going to chance it.  I will be more careful with my line-weight and contrast issues in the future.  I should've tried looking at my pages small/from a distance before I finalized things.  Lettering is definitely still a weak skill for me.  Personally I think my handwriting is both legible and gorgeous, but for some reason my bubbles always fall apart.  The last comic I did I was advised to use digital lettering, but I really suck at it.  I did give it some thought though--I wanted a font with lowercase letters 'cause I feel that says "Autobio comic" more than one that's all caps.

I really just need to make a font out of my handwriting, and maybe work out some kind of hybrid system for the bubbles.

Wei Ingnan
Artist
597 comments
# 100   Posted: Sep 7 2014, 05:46 PM
Whew!....I knew that we were gonna have issues with people voting and commenting what with so many artists signed up...but fuck me I am actually drained by all that......my leg is swollen and sore and my wife is more than a little pissed at me.

If anyone else is stymied by what is quite the task I can suggest that you break it up into groups and do 3 or 4 at a time

Wei Ingnan
Artist
597 comments
# 99   Posted: Sep 7 2014, 05:42 PM
It should go without saying how disgusted and disapointed I am with all of the defaults....you were told to take this seriously and to gauge your schedule before joining....AND you were told that there might be repercussions.....however minor and easily rectified those may be......and a TINY slap on the wrist, expectation of you to meet your own word and encourage/push you to actually make a comic seemed appropriate.
If anyone disagrees with that you can msg me privately(as always) or continue the discussion on the forums....I do not want attention taken away from the genuine efforts of those who did submit any further....it is simply unfair and insulting towards them.

Ahmed: I have absolutely no idea what happened or why you were talking about uploads when you haven't anything to submit...we need to see more from you and this was a perfect chance for you to do that.....it is very perplexing....but obviously has somthing to do with you not acually working on this the first 3 and a half weeks...finish your comic and submit it

Mintley: interesting take on the theme....but the resulting comic was a bit rough and the writing/plotting also a bit clumsy....great background and establishing shots in the first half and I really like your rendering on the first page...not so much the last half.....anatomy and line quality is a definite issue...some of your framing, layouts and 'camera angles' were great and some were kinda crap....mostly good ideas but not all of them executed well... my biggest issues were how it started out strong enough and kinda crapped out in the end artwise and storywise AND you really didn't have a definite start t this admitedly short story(no less important for that)
Dialogue was poor even for a sooperhero comic.....and consistent work and effort should have been higher on a 5 page comic.....but great effort overall.

Slaggle: ?

Slade: Given the page count you have attempted and at least half finished in the past.....I question whether this is actually finished..or even a strong attempt at finishing...people have written the last page off as a clumsy or failed attempt at dividing the story..but I am iffy as to whether that is the case....and suspect it is just unfinished.
Were it to be a division it is inappropriately exercised.....given the length of the comic and the style and colours used it was abrupt and overt.
This really could have used another page...slower pacing and more gentle layouts given the subject matter.
But I suspect that you were aware of your own failings and were trying to severely limit your chance of failure with the absolute minimum page count.......but you ended up only limiting the comic itself.
The writing was awfully vague and elusive(not that everyhting has to be spoonfed) and the spelling errors and  font choices were heavily distracting.
Also you are capable of a much higher quality of line work and overall rendering and colourwork....again I can't help thinking this was rushed and unfinished like so many of your entries......whatever it is that is getting in the way...you yourself or problems in your life...you need to overcome them.

Gregly: ?

Hobbit: really happy to see more attention to line quality...the colours are good as per usual...but the backgrounds and some of the rendering(like that awful waterfall) are severely lacking
The biggest issues are the fonts and bubbles...bleh!...ptew!.......and your continuing your habit of not scripting or plotting out a proper story......beginning....middle...climax....end... ..begining...middle...climax...end.
Also....minor point but while I see multiple representations of the theme in varying degrees they aren't balanced.....black is definitely much more vague and less present.
But overall I enjoyed the comic(liked your choice of drawing from existing text) and very happy to see progress.

Otaku: this is quite nice and you have made a lot of big steps since coming here
the line quality does not work with heavy smudging method you used for the colouring....it also destroys the 'special effects'
some of the perspective shots were a bit off...but given how brave you were with them I can excuse you.
the explosion...which is the climax of the story is really a piss poor bit of work overall....the rendering and plotting complely undermines any impact it could have and should have had....but with the exception of the previous points the plotting and layout of pages 1 and 4 were quite well executed.
the final panel was unneccesary and a heavy handed nod to the theme....it just wasn't needed...especially given how much was sacrified to accomodate it.

BenT: your default was especially disapointing given that even though you were banned from normal matches you were given an opportunity to take part in this event and even use this as your entry to redeem yourself to eveyone including yourself and remove that ban(which was put in place because of you defaulting on two other events)

NRG: I have been made aware that for whatever reasons people around here have made you into some kind of beloved underdog. But I question how thick they might be laying that on or how much they might be excusing your failures.....it actually can be the reverse of helpful as well as condescending and diminshing. I hope it remains a friendly and helpful experience for you and not degenerate into you becoming a pet, like a three legged dog.
Also based on how many references there are to you chatting in the DAchat and in private conversations....how much time are actually spending on your comics?....how much farting around are you doing instead?.....That is a common trap for a lot of our members...members of varying skill levels.
Many Many people have spoken to you many times about unfinished work....Staff have jumped on you and threatened you over your choice of short deadlines and unfinished entries. Now when you have double or more the deadline you usually give yourself you still don't finish....and somehow do it with less skill that before....looking at your last few entries...especially the one where we jumped all over you....this is in no way representative of your best effort.

Kent: if only if only...it was a shame you missed the deadline with your finished entry....I have already read your really gay comic and look forward other people getting the chance to do so when the voting for this event is over.
I am also happy found this to be a good and neccesary challenge and agree that you be pleased with your results.

Deathly: obviously you had some serious problems with the story.....you mention as much and went ahead with Red's open suggestion for a comic about cats(GODDAMMIT RED!!!!)
Artisically and Design wise it is a little hit and miss and certainly not consistent.....your lines are quite good but your underlying shapes need to be MUCH MUCH stronger....the textures, paterns and coloour were however quite successful....and is the only thing that really saves you from a severe thrashing over the story and use/application of the theme.....you obviously hoped to save yourself with the art even on a shorter deadline due to your hesitation.
Overall you should be relatively pleased with yourself in reagrds to the art.....it looks pretty good especially the linework...but I suspect its digital and thats kinda easier to do in that respect...still.... good choices.
the story was EXTREMELY weak and the theme was a tagged on afterthought....you are getting an absolute minimum score in that respect....and narrowly scraping past a tongue-lashing......you REALLY should have just bitten the bullet and forged ahead much earlier with the least objectional idea you had.

FERN:I seriously have very little negative response to this...you made good choices and executed them very well overall.
I hope you are as pleased with this entry as I am.
I do have a suggestion for you....you should consider tighter and sharper linework to juxtapose the watercolours...this could be done with the use of a quill pen or the use of chinese inks with a fine brush(but the quill pen would likely present quicker results as that level of control with a fine brush takes a whole lot longer)

Symon: ?

Sean: ?

FISH: I like where I think you were trying to go with this...but the utter incompleteness and giant pages completely ruins everything and alienates the reader......to the degree that I really find it hard to care about the story or what you had attempted at all.
This is a REAL shame.....as I said I like the direction where you were headed and how you were getting there....the underlying sketches and shapes were good....the plotting and layout were good....I was very pleased with how you had decided to handle the text....had it been finished it would have been really impressive
I am also sad that despite your choice to work with more traditional and 'real' materials....that you didn't finish and it ended up so sloppy.....the pencil lines were completely distracting....the inkwork was also rushed and clumsy and spotty.
Storywise....it started off good but the ending was extremely abrupt....this also negatively impacted the comic.
You obviously did not or were not able to give this anywhere near enough time......and I think that isn't a new thing for you....which given your actual ability and obvious creativity is a real heartbreaker.....STOP BREAKING MY HEART FISH!!!!! I AM OLD AND SAD AND CAN"T TAKE MUCH MORE!!!!

FED: You already stated that you had totally screwed the pooch on this and only followed thru as little as you did because of Bobo's ill fated but well meant declaration....Despite the fair quality of the works displayed especially given how little time you actually ended up spending on it  this is not a finished work or proper exploration of the them in any way....had you not made comments here or slapped that title on it there would not be any reference to it and it wouldn't have been posted....and I will be and expect everyone else to reflect that in the points for this....you didn't default(so good for you... especially in the face of so many....but REALLY people we shouldn't HAVE to keep saying that...'at least you didn't default'....it is getting REALLY weak and is already disgusting how prelivant and used a phrase that is)....so this is a proper submission but a complete failure.
Given your ability you need to give yourself( and us) more time to exercise, explore and appreciate your comics....get over or around whatever it is that is standing in your way.  

Ryzel: ?

SeanJude: ?

SHEN: Great choices and overall good execution here.... drawing sorta falls apart a little in the last two pages but thats a minor complaint.....Also a good choice to go with a pre-exisiting text and you displayed and rendered it well.
Given how much time you had and what your existing skill level are I owuld have liked to have seen more attention paid to the line quality...especially given the quality of the colour application and choices(which also kinda slacked off in the last two pages)....I also approve of the lettering choices...there IS somthing missing there but I can't identify it..... again I hope you are as pleasd with the results as I was....this was a strong effort and entry on your part.

ROB: in juxtaposition to some of your opponents....your comic starts out iffy and gets better in the end(and I am not talking about the obvious colours)....just have to be different don't you?!
The linework and especially the underlying shapes are spotty and still needs a LOT more work....but there definite examples of improvement and attention on those fronts.....now thay you have a boyfriend to pose for you...clothed or nude...your choice....I fully expect a lot more improvement even in the face of constant canoodling.
Your plotting choices were reasonably strong but your execution of the transformation/change was SPOT ON and extremely well executed...great job on that(especially since it was the crux or climax of the story).
Backgrounds are a bit lacking but good where you have them...the first panels really suffer for a lack of background(textures or a patterend but reasonalby empty or colourless monotone would have been good here)
The monotone itself was a little to heavy and warm given what you were trying to do with....it needed to be colder and more faint to better communicate its purpose and juxtapose the eventual transformation(a less opaque mask or photoshop level would have been well used here) even though warm and sunny colours seem to be a growing trademark of yours...which is perfectly fine but you need to learn how to use it properly and use opposites to increase the esthetics of its use....and more shadows like on the schoolyard wall would have been appreciated throughout the comic.
I am excited by this entry because of what it portents for future work from you.....and given that I have also read Kents entry....I can safely say you totally out-gayed him.

EVI:  pages 1-3 are great and I have very few criticisms about them..this is a strong entry and effort..pages 4 and 5 are a bit rougher and obviously more rushed or done without the same level of energy or focus
this comic would have benefitted from a bit more blackwork on the figures and background(or even some crosshatching/stippling/half-tone especially since that is so easily acheived in photoshop) to better flow and offset against the heavy black crows(but I really liked the choices with them).
also the font is a bit weak and a different slighty more approriate choice there would have also imrpoved this comic.

Jetster: ?

Nibbles: I like some of your choices here and have some real dislike or doubts about others....Great story choice.... it is a really well plotted and written short story. The plotting and layout is strong and welll thought out....appropriately increasing the appeal and reception of the story exactly as it should(you should feel really really good about that part...well done)
I am iffy about your choice to use digital fonts, bubbles and panels especially with the handwritten sound effects and overall qualities of the linework.
As for the lack of colour I have doubts as to whether this was intentional or you simply couldn't manage your time well enough to do it.....it isn't required as far as compliance to the theme as I can see its reference in the story and you did exactly as I requested and went for the less obvious....good job there as well....thats much more interesting for such a large if less than expected showing........however the linework is too weak and vague to stand alone without shading or colour...it is good...I like what you were doing....it just looks as if you intended to colour it and as such i isn't strong enough(which isn't really a good excuse...it should be strong enough regardless).
But I want you to be pleased with this overall result and I want to see much more of this level and better out of you going forward.

CRAFTY:  I am thrilled by this entry and your choices...I love that you went full on storybook and especially your choice to use only traditonal rendering and materials....GREAT!...but THEN you loose me on the digital text and bubbles.....not so crafty there, Crafty.
The rest of my comments are suggestions or things that I think you should try or could have/should have done....things that would have improved this past "really excellent work to why isn't this being published?"
A greater gap of space between the images and actual fading or 'feathering' of the image edges(like a gradual wash of watercolours) would have been more appreciated.....and is easily acheivable even given that you are editing/cutNpasting watercolour illos in a graphics program.
More fine sketchy lines(like weak half-assed crosshatching) with your inks would really make these pop....give them some extra flavour and appeal.
A tiny bit more attention to plotting and layout every page would also benefit this or future works.... for the most part it is actually really good and deceptively simple(even tho you are throwing some gentle almost invisible curveballs there)...and kudos for those.....but there are also there are some relatively weaker spots....like the page when the boy gets hurt or to a lesser extent the last page following...conversely page 3 and to a lesser extent page 2 are great.
I really love this and was so upset when I thought we might not figure out whose comic it wasand whomever had produced might get a default on it.....you should feel very happy with this and then say pffftt! and move on to somthing even better.

Last suggestion: before oyu move on to somthing better and in addition to watching Steven Universe I really really want you to watch The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh from Disney 1977...watch it over and over again and try to track down as much and many of the original images for the first printings of the books by A.A. Milne.

Momoless: ?

WU: looking at even only your last two submitted comics your comment of 'can't draw for shit' is obviously you just being upset with yourself and not representative of your previous efforts....I want to stress that although you still need to practice a LOT more.... you have potential and you shouldn't be saying or thinking things like that which are only going to hinder your passion or initiative to do so.....I am also streesing this because I am gonna yell at you a little bit here.
this comic is a perfect example of what some of your problems are...especially in some of your even earlier works.....you have a good eye for plotting and layout...and I guess your stories are ok if a little too simple(but thats to be expected and you shouldn't even be worried about that at this stage...its the staging/plotting that you really have going for you)....but you simply aren't giving yourself an opprtunity to practice your drawing....and I think if making comics is at all important to you you need to commit yourself to making a BIG effort to improve and practice those drawing skills (and there are A LOT of people who would be pleased to help you almost tirelessly if you are SERIOUS and simply ask...myself included)...BUT what you absolutely positively MUST stop doing right this very second is trying to avoid the issue by covering up or avoiding the issue....PUT THE FUCKING PHOTOSHOP DOWN AND WALK AWAY!
It is a cheap cop-out or fake-out and whether you believe it or not you are already better than that and it only serves to make your artwork and other efforts look worse(AND your photoshop choices aren't always the best either)
An entire comic drawn at the same level of skill and completeness as that spaceship interioir would have been heads above preferable to what you have done here....and you are really only cheating yourself by doing so.
The 'can't draw for shit' bullshit is also just a cop-out...and it serves no purpose except to hurt yourself and your chances at getting better...SO FUCKING STOP IT!
Make a thread in the Art section and start drawing everyday for absolutely as much as you can....15 min or 3 hours....read materials(although drawing is better than reading tutorials) and ask for help/input...this time next year you will be much improved and kicking yourself for the right reasons instead.

BOBO: while i was 100% behind the sentiment of your tirade and am totally aware of the reasons for your absence....or maybe because of those reasons...I am am not going to comment on this entry...except to say that it is totally and utterly unrepresentitve of your work on a whole(and we know why)... it would not have gone up except for the absolute faintest nod to the theme(and people should be giving you serious penalties for that regardless of why....which is what they are expected to be doing with any of the entries that are iffy with the theme)...and that everyone who has given you anything over a 1 or 2 for any part of this needs to be lined up and shot...the ones who gave you 5s or 7s they need to be sterilized, lobotomized and have their hands cut off.

ROBOSOCK: great to see you taking part around here again...based on this entry and the other examples I have seen of your work elsewhere on line...you have not been idle and have improved quite a bit.
As much as you have improved and what I can assume must be a schedule rife with other projects and responsibilities on the go, I have some real issues with this comic.
The drawng and underlying forms are strong and the layout/plotting is equally well done...however the crappy digital 'ink' lines and qucikly applied colours really detract from the quality parts of this comic....it would have benfitted form some half-tones or textures....or sumthin
This is also true of the questionable and poorly executed text/fonts.
But the worst is how rushed the final page is especially in comaprison to the first two pages....given how simple the comic was(and that is not a bad thing) I am not wrong in expecting more quality work.....so either you did not or could not give this the time and effort it needed...because as I said I have seen that you are capable of much better.

DMDN: Not the best first start....we were intrigued by you Submission of your first character to the site but also worried that based on that entry you weren't prepared to take this seriously....this being your first comic on the site does not help change that opinion...I can only hope that you attmept to change that opinion in the future.
























Fred v2.0.1
Artist
475 comments
# 98   Posted: Sep 6 2014, 07:21 PM
Wow, I might hate the amount of defaults, but all the ones that submitted were pretty fun reads!
I'll just do short comments;

Mints: I like the amount of effort you tried to put in there and the way you told your little story with the news folks.
Slade: Nice and poetic and tragic and quite  simple, but works quite well, I think.
Hobbit: It's cute, I really like the vibrant colours. Some narrative issues, it feels like you needed more pages to make it work the way you were telling it, but it got potential
Taylor: That ending is like, super abrupt sudden exposition. But the rest is really cool, really fun compositions.
NRG: you gots colours, mostly, that's pretty nice. Keep on keeping on.
Silent: I like the way this looks, it's pretty cute, the story's super dumb, but also cute. Cool.
Fern: Quite like them colours, though there's something about that text that makes me not want to read it. Not sure what it is, it's just so square and unnatractive and my eye keeps shifting back to points in the pictures.
Fish: yeah, those pages are just a tad too big. But god damn I loved your story. It's very well told and I might have had a tear there.
Fed: Strangely wacky, a fun little ride to be sure, I like how you sprinkled the theme around.
Rob: You're so sappy :P
Shen: I don't know, pretty good looking, pretty fun read! That magical punishment at the end is the best I've ever heard of.
Evi: So gloomy and surreal and good. It looks great, I have no idea what that place is but hell do I like it.
Nibbles: I like how the little life story suddenly turned supernatural, but in a way that felt very natural. Good job.
Crafty: The designs and colours are very attractive and the story's pretty cute.  
Wu At-at: Nice space or whatever, except where it matters, that earth is kinda shoddy!
Bobo: I don't understand it at all, but I like the designs a lot.
SockMonkey: Simple story and telling, but effective and good twist thing there.

DeathlySilent
Artist
38 comments
# 97   Posted: Sep 6 2014, 09:45 AM
Before I comment on the other comics I'd like to thank and respond to the people who commented on mine, I really appreciate the time that was taken to give me feedback.

Rob:
DEALTHYSILENT - I love how you did it about cats. Is that because Red was all DO IT ABOUT CATS?  xD  It was cute and funny, and such, but I think it's just a liiiittle cheaty to just name a character after the theme. Coulda used more theme. Otherwise, super cute.
Quote

Yes, I guess I do have to give credit to Red for the cat idea. I originally had two more developed ideas (with better theme usage :( ) for my comic. The first I vetoed because I knew it was too complicated to finish on time. The second I had gotten pretty far on but got stuck between life and starting to hate the comic. Then I started to realize that even if I devoted my full attention to the comic for the rest of the time period it wouldn't be a clean and finished piece ( which is the reason I wanted to participate in the event, I don't finish the comics I start all the time). So instead of giving up and having my first default, I remembered what Red said writing about cats. And after that I just thought "I like cats." And so I picked up my pencil. So thank Red for helping me not default, and Wei and Bobo as well for that matter.

otakutaylor:
DeathlySilent: Ahh, the secret lives of housecats. The theme wasn't used too much, being only the cats name, but it was a very amusing take, and the designs for the cats worked well for their personalities. the mild fuzz and the textured wallpapers added just enough contrast to make it really work. The white cat being the only one with an indication of shading threw me only in the slightest, but I understand why. That's like, the only thing I can critique. Seems like it'd make a great little web or newspaper comic series.

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I'm sorry the shading threw you off a little, I wasn't planning on shading at all, I but I thought the white one really needed it. I thought it could a fun little series too :) Thank you.

MisterMints:
Deathly- Not sure how well it fits the theme, although any comic about the legendary tale of a kitty cat leading his people is a-ok in my book haha. Aside from the application of the theme, I feel like this foray into kitty war is definitely going to make their owner think twice about leaving that litterbox un-checked.  Super solid art and hilarious!

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Thank you! I 'm glad you enjoyed the comic overall! I enjoyed writing and drawing it :).

neens:
deathlysilent: eh. I love cats but this wasn't doing anything for me. looks like it was done fairly quick. lack of shading on everything and a texture over all of it really flattens it out. also you were really reaching for a theme tie-in with that name.

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I'm sorry you didn't enjoy  it Neens. It was done quickly ( but determinedly) after throwing away my two previous ideas. I can only hope to leave a better impression the next time.


Now about the theme since everyone who commented had an issue with it, I would like to say that I completely understand. It was a weakly used. In the past I've had theme projects and I was always accused on using it too literally and was the jealous of the geniuses who weaved fantastic ideas and the others who used the theme minimally as a qualifying factor that was enormously out shined by their art. I the minimal ( with out the art to back it up I might add) because I didn't want to do literal again? Which backfired, but I didn't have the intention of cheating and I did it on purpose. But as I said I knew it was weak and tried to back it up with coloring the character with bluish-grey and black? However, I remembered reading that the comics would be proof-read to see if they met requirements to be posted, and I was very relieved when I saw mine up. But my use of theme obviously didn't work, and I'm sorry.

Overall, I loved the idea of this event! Even if the turn out wasn't expected and a lot were disappointed. But I think it was a good exercise and despite what I turned in I'm happy I completed something. If this event doesn't get a repeat, I hope I can push myself to do something similar on my own.

THANK YOU EVERYONE!

The Bent One
Artist
564 comments
# 96   Posted: Sep 5 2014, 07:41 PM
I really hope the "Dumb Baby" title is a temporary thing.

I had my own reasons for not turning in anything (mostly involving a new job and lots of stress). I am still working on what would have been my entry, and I will upload it when I finish it.

Ha ha it's a joke on everyone who didn't upload. wonderful.

ha ha

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 95   Posted: Sep 4 2014, 04:00 PM
Great job everyone (who turned something in)!

And great comments!

Rob:
NIBBLES- Well done, I like the art, I LOVE the writing, I like the story, though it seemed really unfinished. Like, a prologue to a bigger story (Please, continue it? I would love to read the rest of it). Didn't really catch the black and blue theme in there either?
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Well, um, in spite of the seeming supernatural-ness of the story, it is, in fact autobiographical.  I strongly suspect my dog Red, of pulling my unconscious arse to shore.  It's only in the weeks following that I actually saw the kelpie(thing) in my nightmares.  The lake in the comic is Athens Lake in Henderson County Texas, that island really is there, and really does have a reputation for being haunted (as is supposedly the rest of the town).  I've thought about doing a series of my childhood adventures, but typically when I tell them in person, I'm either met with disbelief or "Where the hell were your parents?!"

otakutaylor:
Nibbles: I kind of expected this to go further, but I certainly got a good laugh out of what I was thinking would be another sad story. While I know it deals with water, I think it's kind of lacking the theme a bit. I can see where it would have, but it didn't. Still with what seems like a lack of lines you carried a lot of depth and perspective in each panel. and the horse panels breaking/bending borders ment a lot. It's a little tweak but adds a lot of supernatural feeling.
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Yeah, I'm bad at themes, and I should've known what was obvious to me wouldn't be to everyone else.  Perhaps I should've had someone nearby to beta it for me.

Mintly:
 Nibbles- I really enjoyed this comic, sort of elegant in its simplicity. I also think it's really cool when work reminds me of other techniques, and I can't tell if this was done traditionally or digitally, but the styling of your lines almost reminds me of linocuts. The last page, where the beast makes its declaration, did throw me off a bit. Like Evi's I feel like if this had been 6 pages instead of 5 it would have been a lot stronger, but it still ties up nicely.
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The pen I used is called the Tachikawa Linemaker A.T. and the line it makes makes me think of Victorian love letters and drawings of ladies in corsets.  I was wondering if the digital text stuck out too much.  I almost did all the lettering my hand, but changed my mind after the first page (that I then re-drew)... I suppose that's why that one is lighter than the others, something I didn't realize till I saw the thumbnails.  (note to self: look at everything super small size before uploading.)

neens:

nibbles: I actually wanted to see more, haha. the rendering isn't bad at all, though with all that white I kinda want to see more space filled in.
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I agree.  Something I noticed when I saw the thumbnails.  Apparently I resisted my usual urge to crosshatch it to death too well.

Thanks for all the lovely comments and advice!

neens
Approval Committee
259 comments
# 94   Posted: Sep 4 2014, 03:42 PM
Wu AT-AT: neens: fun fact: making the 'boring space scenes' took actually less time together than the spaceship and the locket. I just can't draw for shit.
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I didn't use the words 'boring space scenes' so I'm not sure why you quoted them o: they are nice bgs, but that alone isn't cutting it for me is all. I can tell my crit rubbed you the wrong way though. don't let it get under your skin, it's not personal. feel good that you produced completed work on time! c:

Wubble
Think Tank
91 comments
# 93   Posted: Sep 4 2014, 12:02 PM
neens: fun fact: making the 'boring space scenes' took actually less time together than the spaceship and the locket. I just can't draw for shit.

neens
Approval Committee
259 comments
# 92   Posted: Sep 4 2014, 10:19 AM
wow lookit all them dumb baby icons!!

mintley: the couple hero idea is really cute! this stayed consistant throughout and looks real good.

slade: more effort defintiely could have went into this I think! a lot of solids, empty space, no shading, etc.

hobbit: pretty cute! I think more fleshed out bgs would have helped.

otaku: not bad at all! I'd say your shading is too soft though. and.. I thought the "black and blue" quote at the end was kinda cheesy, and forcing the theme too much.

NRG: ahh this is so close to being a "complete" from you!! I really wish it had stayed consistant throughout.

deathlysilent: eh. I love cats but this wasn't doing anything for me. looks like it was done fairly quick. lack of shading on everything and a texture over all of it really flattens it out. also you were really reaching for a theme tie-in with that name.

fern: visually impressive! really nice colors. the poetry lost me though.

atomicfish: SO BIG. this makes it difficult to read and crit properly I'm afraid. all the pencil lines left in makes this look very unfinished and messy too. also.. black tears are so, so creepy.

fed: personally, just not super into it. prolly the rhyming, haha. lotsa white space in the comic that feels like it could have been filled.

rob: cute idea! I think that your ink lines are shaky, which tells me you should work on drawing the lines with more authority.

shen: pretty good! something about your art always feels like it was drawn quickly to me. I think it's due to a bunch of little errors that pile up over the course of a comic, if that makes sense. crooked bits and whatnot. BUT I can tell a lot of effort went into this one!

evi: this was real real good. I wanna know more! I like the perspective from the crows too, and the palette.

nibbles: I actually wanted to see more, haha. the rendering isn't bad at all, though with all that white I kinda want to see more space filled in.

crafty: MY FAVE! this was cute and charming all around. love your watercolors.

wutata: not a fan of the text pages. the only page that feels like an actual comic page is the last one, mmaybe the second to last. the difference in rendering between the space scenes and the uh.. spaceship, or whatever it might be, is very jarring. definitely look like you put all your time into making space bgs and not much else.

bobo: not sure how it fits the theme beyond the word blue at the top. but yea.. you weren't kidding when you said this wasn't your best /:

robosockmonkey: short, sweet, to the point. I like that! maybe could have added some more panels/pages to flesh out a bit more, but it works as is.

Minteh
Artist
252 comments
# 91   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 10:14 PM
Thanks for the comments thus far! My comments on comics are lower, here's responses:

Rob- For the finishing move, I had an entire list of possible moves, but none of them were cool enough.  I cut back my script so it was only 4 + 1/2 pages, and then came up with this move which unfortunately felt like it needed more than half a page to itself, so it definitely ended up a bit squished haha. The name of their individual attacks are "Blackthron Whip" and "Petal Piledriver" because that is important yes.

Taylor- Thank you thank youuu, my hand hates me for putting it through all of that hatching.  It's something I do with my pencils all the time and i never pushed it into my inks.  The panel on page 2 was the first panel I inked, specifically because I loved it so much so I'm glad you loved it to!  I'm trying to get more elasticity into my characters and dynamic perspectives, so it's good to know I'm on the right track!

OK, let's try and do this haha, CRITIQUES:

Slade- I really liked this comic, it took me a second or two right at the end, but then I got it and it made me super sad.  It really hit me because I have friends in the same boat and it's never easy, but at the same time the fact that you struck that chord in the first place is testament to the combination of your storytelling and illustration.  Looking at the thumbs I very honestly thought it wasn't going to be too much, then it hit me with a bag full of bricks made of feels.

Hobbit- Personally I'm not a fan of using a pre-existing story, just for the sake of the challenge, but I am probably just being a stickler :P Despite that, I feel like this is a definite strong showing from you and your abilities.  While the characters show up really strong you definitely have more to work on when it comes to backgrounds, when they were there they were pretty basic.  Not to say you have to go crazy on them or anything, just work to incorporate them a little more into your pages!

Taylor- This was really nice, I thought this was one of the most clever interpretations of the theme.  The tagline "Between Black and Blue" has such a poetic nuance to it when used in such a potential real world catastrophe.  I did get a liiiittle lost without the structure of panels in some of the pages, like I would get pulled away and back in and I found myself spending some time studying some of the pages more than actually reading them. I will say though that without panel borders it *felt* more like freedom and flight.

NRG- Your comic made me super sad haha, I empathize with the kid, but at the same time as someone who was bullied it wasn't really something I wanted to empathize with.   I guess it just feels like there's conflict, but really no resolution - or at the very least not one that a general audience would appreciate or seek out.

Deathly- Not sure how well it fits the theme, although any comic about the legendary tale of a kitty cat leading his people is a-ok in my book haha. Aside from the application of the theme, I feel like this foray into kitty war is definitely going to make their owner think twice about leaving that litterbox un-checked.  Super solid art and hilarious!

Fern- Echoing what I said to hobbit about using a pre-existing story as a basis, but again, I'm just being picky probably :P But then again I can't stay mad at you with those beautiful watercolurs.  The artistic style was really well executed and brought the story to life.

Atomic- another super sad one aw man ; ^ ; This was a really good one, I kind of got reminded of another comic floating around (where the girl's mother sends her letters and she's the princess of pluto) which I love, so it was kind of a nice connection. It gave me that really sad feeling at the end where I wanna tell them it's gonna be ok, you shot me through the heart and it's way too late haha.  Your watercolours are really nice, but I have to echo the amount of close-up panels.  The page sizes are obviously a little distracting, but I know that wasn't intentional!

Fed- I see what you meant about this being unfinished, but at the same time I think you closed it up pretty well within those three pages.  It feels like a really quirky but complete story, which your character design and rough edges style really seems to complement.  I got a little bit lost while reading the dialogue, not sure if it's something that already exists or not, but I couldn't get into the flow of it.

Rob- Definitely on the sweet side! Personally I've seen this kind of story once or twice before, but you did it justice! On page three though, watch out for those hands! I am pretty sure the palm is facing in, so the thumb should be on the outside (I am pretty sure those are knuckles? maybe?).  The softness of the colour creeping into the character's body was well executed, but I feel like it's a bit incomplete with no shadows on the coloured characters. You've got highlights for everything, but only shadows for the blues.

Shen- Echoing (again) what I said about fern and Hobbit's, I'm not fond of using a pre-existing story, so that takes away a bit for me.  I'm actually familiar with this story, although from a slightly different perspective maybe, so it was cool to see this version.  I feel like this is one of the most solid comics out of the group, it looks complete and reads well.  The backgrounds are excellent, the characters belong there and it just all works for me.

EVI- EVI. EVI EVI EVI. I'm so stoked about this comic, you ended up in a dark and fantastic place, and there's something really cool about it.  Writing it from the perspective of the crows was a great move, their chatter must have driven that poor kid crazy at first.  Always interesting to see these different perspectives when dealing with a human character, especially with that monstrosity at the end.  Like I told you already, I feel like if it had been six pages it would have been PERFECT, but something somewhere is a tiny bit squished.

Nibbles- I really enjoyed this comic, sort of elegant in its simplicity.  I also think it's really cool when work reminds me of other techniques, and I can't tell if this was done traditionally or digitally, but the styling of your lines almost reminds me of linocuts.  The last page, where the beast makes its declaration, did throw me off a bit.  Like Evi's I feel like if this had been 6 pages instead of 5 it would have been a lot stronger, but it still ties up nicely.

Crafty- I'm so jelly about your watercolours, they're so lovely.  This remidns me of those Peter Cottontail books that i grew up with so I had warm fuzzies reading it.  The idea to go without defined panels I feel was the best choice, it leaves your colours and characters unconstricted and really helps the flow of the read.  No complaints!

Wu- I'm not gonna lie, I skipped a decent amount of text, I feel like it was a bit unappealing.  The pages really leave me wanting more in terms of the characterization, I'm not much a fan of disembodied narrators, especially when I feel like I should be empathizing with them. On the second read I felt I understood it a little better.

Bobo- I had to re-read it a couple of times before I think I got it, but your comment about her having blue eyes made it make much much much more sense I feel.  if it had that colour on it it definitely would've tied ti together more for me.  I got lost in the middle of page 2 where he's throwing something and they're also sitting at a desk or something.  I wasn't sure which part of which drawing belonged to which scene and maybe it's just me but I got a little caught up in it and got pulled out of the story a bit.

Robo- I didn't pick up on the Seppuku when I read through it, actually when I read your comment it was like a happy discovery.  I liked it, but I didn't really understand how it tied up - but I *liked* it.  So when you said that he killed himself I went back and excitedly re-read it with more clarity, it wasn't a chore to go back through, and I enjoyed it more with that clearer vision.  I don't know if re-readability is a compliment, but being able to discover something that you missed initially and have the story be all the better for it is a big plus in my opinion!

WHEW.

Robosockmonkey
Artist
109 comments
# 90   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 08:43 PM
I'm liking what Im seeing... read through them all and I'll make a more detailed comment later.
Awsome critiques otakutaylor and Rob, hope more are on the way from others.
The 2nd shot in the last page seems sort of wasted, like, it could have show an action shot of the epic battle or something, and it makes the last panel sort of confusing. Like, the text insinuates that he won, but it looks like he's on the verge of death? Did he kill the oni? Where is the dead oni?  =_=
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To clarify this a bit the soul cleansing was seppuku... the slash in his stomach was made by himself. Anyway good job all around for those of us who finished.

PyrasTerran
Community Manager
1436 comments
# 89   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 07:43 PM
I'll read all these after I stop crying from the TWELVE DEFAULTS @____@

Fearn
Artist
349 comments
# 88   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 07:29 PM
Thanks for critiques guise, keep 'em coming!

Re theme, i did not want to go for something obviously black and blue. Black often symbolises death, so i wanted the story to include that. Blue is both water and the storm kelpie (the dude on a horse), who is also called Blue man of the Minch.

I will read all these and comment at some point!

Bobo
Web Dev
894 comments
# 87   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 07:06 PM
@Rob (and everyone else, for the last part): Wow! Thanks for actually reading ALL of our comics! That fills me with joy and happiness all over!

I didn't get time to color my comic, so the blue part of the theme ended up only somewhat implied rather than explicit. It's intended to refer to the color of the main characters' eyes. As for the story... well, I'm curious what your take was on it! I left it ambiguious on purpose, although it would have been less vague if I had started a month ago instead of last week >_<

otakutaylor
Artist
179 comments
# 86   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 05:23 PM
More defaults than I expected... but at least less than half I guess. Still had some very interesting entries out of these. I may have been dumb enough to think I was going to vote despite being in this battle, but I can still critique stuff! Gotta take a while, So let's get this started!

Ahmed: You butt.

Mintley: Excellent detail ink work, and a neat use of the theme. I'd say maybe work on using some ruler straight lines in places, to contrast your organic lines across your comic. It might add some variation and complimentary tones to it, but it looks excellent as it is. I LOVE the little hatch shading work. A few of your actiony poses seem static, but you NAILED IT on page 2 panel 3. Serious use of stretch and perspective to show movement.

Slagglle: You butt.

Slade: Leaving the last page with that white makes me unsure if that was intentional or lack of time left to color the page. A Very good use of the theme to communicate the turmoil in sexual identity. Though honestly, if the theme was Red and Blue it might have meshed even better with the use of purple, heh.  That body shape certainly wouldn't be a problem for some of us, but a nice way to explain the frustration in the perspective of others. A friend of mine had to suffer through a lot of that kind of stuff recently, and it speaks a lot when you get to that point where you only realize what you could have done, too late.

Gregly: you butt.

Hobbittastic: Though white text on blue bubbles works, you need to put some practice and adjusting into how the words sit inside the bubbles. Too close too the walls, and a few times the words didn't flow too well. If you don't, I'd reccomend scripting the words into the panels before you finish sketching pages and trying to follow a simple path. The bubbles make full circles in their order, or even cross over each other. That said, the story was VERY well executed, and felt really complete and satisfied at the end.

Otakutaylor: Blended so much there's not enough contrast you moron!

The Bent one: You butt.

NRG: This kind of feels like it's only act 1 of a larger story. Like, it was going somewhere, and then just didn't. Might be the point, sometimes bullying doesn't get resolved. Also, break out the ruler at least when you're drawing panel lines and the backgrounds. practice some basic 1 or 2 point perspectives.

misterkent: You butt.

DeathlySilent: Ahh, the secret lives of housecats. The theme wasn't used too much, being only the cats name, but it was a very amusing take, and the designs for the cats worked well for their personalities. the mild fuzz and the textured wallpapers added just enough contrast to make it really work. The white cat being the only one with an indication of shading threw me only in the slightest, but I understand why. That's like, the only thing I can critique. Seems like it'd make a great little web or newspaper comic series.

Fern: Magnificent work! Those colors are beautiful and you told whatever old tale this is excellently. I think my only critique would be... theme. Yes the water was black and blue, but... if no one ever said what the theme was, I don't think anyone would guess it. Not sure how you'd work it in though... ::shrug::  I was gonna say try varying up the angles and perspectives, but I think the constant flat horizontal worked well for the fairytale/poem kind of usage.

Symon_Says: You butt.

Sean: You butt.

Atomicfish: Dem Feels. The torn up letter usage was very touching. The theme wasn't too prominent  beyond being in that color, but it hit the tone very well in the messy watercolor shapes and such. while the comic was all missized, the panels being mostly close ups seemed like avoiding backgrounds. and while the contrast between them all and the final one gives a very important "alone" feeling. it could have been more exaggerated with some different compositions of panels.

Fed: Bonus points for having a musical comic, but I ended up lost on the songs beat with a few of the word choices. Either I don't know the song, or it didn't flow well enough. The creative paneling was nice though, and I liked the character designs.

Rob: Theeeeeeeme~ Mmmm, love the usage here. Love, depression, ignorance, excellent. The colors did so much for your story. I will say that although it makes a statement going from bland to vibrant, you might have needed to tweak some values (not just hues) to bring out more contrast. That and with everything being the exact same shade of blue, you ended up with a lot of plain blue backgrounds, be they up against walls or not. Little details, scratches, brick patterns, etc. can do a lot to grounding a piece. instead of people floating in blue space.

Ryzel: You butt.

Seanjude666: You butt.

Animeshen: This AND a battle at the same time! Daaaaaaaaang. Love the water effects (especially underwater). There is a few tangent issues with the panels and text boxes, but the panel positioning overall rocked. The theme I think worked well in this one because everywhere the character showed up, it was at least tinted black and blue. Awesome stuff!

Evi: mind = blown. Now THAT is one heck of an existential useage of the theme. I'm sitting here thinking I understood it right, but reminding myself I don't have to understand it to appreciate it. Excellent limited color pallet and the tinge of pink sold it. the little bit of what seems like pixelation on the text bubbles caught me at first, but was quickly forgotten in the story. ::slowclaps:: well done.

Miss Jetster Jay: You butt.

Nibbles: I kind of expected this to go further, but I certainly got a good laugh out of what I was thinking would be another sad story. While I know it deals with water, I think it's kind of lacking the theme a bit. I can see where it would have, but it didn't. Still with what seems like a lack of lines you carried a lot of depth and perspective in each panel. and the horse panels breaking/bending borders ment a lot. It's a little tweak but adds a lot of supernatural feeling.

Crafty: I may have seen too many stories like this, but I guessed the ending by the first page. That doesn't mean I didn't enjoy it! The character designs are really well shaped, the paneling is excellently used, and I liked how your text and word bubbles flowed. I really wanna see more of this witch~

Momoless: You butt.

Wu At-At: floating words and backgrounds again. Yes it makes a point, but it doesn't feel sequential till the last two panels. It's a bit like having music in the background as you read, but for the eyes. While the planets are well done (and I know how annoying blank space can be to fill in) it really lacks the comic part of comics. as a short illustrated story however, it works rather well. As a guy who also used that particular version of Black and Blue, it was a bittersweet ending but an understandable one.

Bobo: No real blue, No real black, kind of missing a conflict. I assume this is a mildly romantic pretense but I'm really not seeing it. Shy crush might be visible, but doesn't do much. I'd like to say adding text might have helped, but a comic should stand on it's own without it's words if possible, no?

Robosockmonkey: I applaud the use of so many big backgroundy shots, but even if it's a desolate wasteland of a mountain range put a little bit more love into those rocks! There is a small nitpick over the line quality of the guy in page 2 panel 1, he seems to sharp compared to the demon. I get that it could be used to really demonstrate the size between them, but the rock he's standing on is also the demons line quality, and that little level of detail doesn't show up elsewhere. Very simple story, but with great consequence. The text to panel format fit it well, but they bounced around their own borders a bit.

Dmdn: You butt.

That's everyone I hope! Some very excellent comics and I was glad to read them! It was one heck of a month for me drawing my side but I am so glad I did, the color, line, and mostly time management practice meant a lot to me, and I think it'll really help me focus more in the future. Good work everyone who isn't a butt!

RobThing
Artist
84 comments
# 85   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 04:51 PM
Apparently my entry confused you more than you realized.  MtF.  
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AHA. Whoops. No, sorry, I meant MtF  xD;;;  I did catch that, but I typed it backwards for some reason, sorry  ^.^;;

Pepper JAQ
Artist
212 comments
# 84   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 04:36 PM
SLADE - The style was neat, but it took me a minute to realize that the white lines on page one were supposed to be people? The text was a little bit confusing to wrap my head around. Also, ahhh transgender female character, bonus points for you. Sad ending was sad (although I feel the need to school you on FtM trans stuff, because male puberty stuff is actually sort of fixable with therapy and surgery and whatnot).
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Apparently my entry confused you more than you realized.  MtF. After puberty (around age 22-25),  the bones of the hips and face are set. HRT will soften skin and help with distribution of cellulite, but anything pertaining to bone structure will require surgery.

The point of the last page was that she felt ashamed that she refused to connect the dots back when she was much younger, when HRT would have had a greater,  more natural impact

This is the fears and despairs of a MtF just realizing her truth at 33.

That aside, thank you for the commentary.

RobThing
Artist
84 comments
# 83   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 04:07 PM
KENT HOW DARE YOU
I was so excited for your super gay comic  ;__;


MINTLEY- That was sort of neat. I like the designs for the super hero duo  ^.^ The ending was super rushed, the finishing move was like, what? What just happened? I don't know? There was a tornado? It seems like it was maybe supposed to be epic, and needed so much more space that it was given? But whatever. It was cool!  :)

SLADE - The style was neat, but it took me a minute to realize that the white lines on page one were supposed to be people? The text was a little bit confusing to wrap my head around. Also, ahhh transgender female character, bonus points for you. Sad ending was sad (although I feel the need to school you on FtM trans stuff, because male puberty stuff is actually sort of fixable with therapy and surgery and whatnot).

HOBBIT - That first panel on page two seems super crammed with text  =_=  I was tempted to skim. Also, I don't understand the purpose of the elf(?) person in the next panel after that? Who is it? Some sort of love interest? Idk. How did that person change anything? I love the "BUT"  "WHAT"  "IF"  panels. And the color scheme is sooo pretty. And I reeally did not like the speech bubbles. Just that they were clearly done by an oval tool. It just seems really out of place.

OTAKU - I looove the way you did pages 1 & 2. Did not like page 3 at all, it seemed really empty. I really dislike the way you draw faces? It always feels like the anatomy is slightly off. And wait, what? I don't understand, did she crash into the comet on purpose? What?

NRG - It was mostly meh. Nothing really exceptional, but nothing really awful either? Sorry dude  ^.^;;

DEALTHYSILENT - I love how you did it about cats. Is that because Red was all DO IT ABOUT CATS?  xD  It was cute and funny, and such, but I think it's just a liiiittle cheaty to just name a character after the theme. Coulda used more theme. Otherwise, super cute.

FERN - Super pretty. Like, omg pretty. Wow. Other than the epic pretty, I found it really tedious to read, and did not catch at all how it was supposed to fit the theme?

FISH - PAGES SO BIG. WHAT.  I read it anyways. It was soooo cute and sooo sad, and soooo funny, and I would be like, EVERYONE GO HOME FISH WINS THE THING, but like. So. Big.

FED - The white text with the black outline hurt my eyes  =___=  But like, I really like your facial expressions. And such a great twist with the girl. But like, I don't understand the last panel?

SHEN - It seemed longer than it was, while reading. I love the way you drew the river people attacking the boat. Water people, so cool. Generally the story was pretty neat.

EVI- That. Was really cool. Very very cool. I can't think of anything critique-wise to say about it, just that I wish there was more  xD

NIBBLES- Well done, I like the art, I LOVE the writing, I like the story, though it seemed really unfinished. Like, a prologue to a bigger story (Please, continue it? I would love to read the rest of it). Didn't really catch the black and blue theme in there either?

CRAFTY - I love your art. I am such a sucker for watercolor. I love the way you do characters. I love your story. Yes. You are clearly going to be the one to majorly kick everyones ass in this. I feel like such shit, I don't deserve to be in a battle with someone at your level of abnosome.

WU - Really good setup, the writing was pretty good, but kind of disappointed for the ending. I just expected more.

BOBO- It was cute! The art was super cute. It took me a few reads to sort of figure out what was going on, and I'm still not that certain? And I don't really get where the theme comes in either. But yeh. It wasn't as bad as you set us up to believe  xD

ROBOSOCK-  It didn't really come across as a comic, just really really cinematic, like a polished storyboard. I kind of liked it  xD  Some of the shots you chose are super epic. The 2nd shot in the last page seems sort of wasted, like, it could have show an action shot of the epic battle or something, and it makes the last panel sort of confusing. Like, the text insinuates that he won, but it looks like he's on the verge of death? Did he kill the oni? Where is the dead oni?  =_=

THERE YOU GO,
I THINK THAT IS ALL.
Wooo.

Super good job anyways, for those of you that finished~!
GOLD STARS FOR YOU.

Red
Council
636 comments
# 82   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 03:34 PM
There will probably only be like 4 votes on this because most of the site can't vote! bahah! Well, you guys should at least comment!!! :)

otakutaylor
Artist
179 comments
# 81   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 03:29 PM
oh. my god am I dumb. DUR. hehehe. I was all excited to read and vote in peoples things. Forgot about that detail. ::facepalm::

Atomicfish
Artist
116 comments
# 80   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 03:27 PM
otakutaylor: Just about to start reading, and I noticed.... There doesn't appear to be any means to vote on the comics. Is it there hidden and my computer isn't displaying it or does anyone else seem to be lacking the voting bars?
Quote
You can't vote on your own battle, dude. :P
Yikes! My pages a huge! Sorry, ya'll...

otakutaylor
Artist
179 comments
# 79   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 03:22 PM
Just about to start reading, and I noticed.... There doesn't appear to be any means to vote on the comics. Is it there hidden and my computer isn't displaying it or does anyone else seem to be lacking the voting bars?

Bobo
Web Dev
894 comments
# 78   Posted: Sep 3 2014, 02:35 PM
We fixed it, guys! Oh no, that means you all get to see how my comic is the worst one and I'll have to hide under a rock for the rest of my days!!!

Oh well, at least a few people did a decent job. All of these defaults make me cry tears of sadness forever.

Red
Council
636 comments
# 77   Posted: Sep 2 2014, 08:23 AM
Hey guys, thanks for the emails! Sorry, this is a weird situation involving a ton of people and a ton of problems. So, sit tight and we will try to resolve everything as soon as we can, but don't be surprised if it doesn't go up today.
This does not mean the deadline is extended. If you haven't uploaded yet, we've taken note and you are indeed too late.

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 76   Posted: Sep 2 2014, 04:53 AM
Ya'll's art is going to blow mine out of the water, ha ha. :)  I'm so rusty I could be used as a cautionary tale of how if you don't use it you lose it.  Still I'm really proud of myself for one big reason--I managed to do this with the kids underfoot.  Not waiting for them to go to bed.  Not sending them to grandma's.  But with them actually in the room (and practically on top of me).  So I've got that victory if nothing else.  Now I just have to get back in the habit of drawing daily and I'll be set.

Fearn
Artist
349 comments
# 75   Posted: Sep 2 2014, 01:44 AM
 
Wei Ingnan: with the exception of Slade I only have pages from the people who have commented here as having uploaded..more on how shameful that is later
Quote

So I can safely assume you got mine and it's all dandy?

Pepper JAQ
Artist
212 comments
# 74   Posted: Sep 2 2014, 01:38 AM
X3 Yeah, sorry about not commenting. But yeah, Hurrah! A much different creature to what I had originally planned... still, in, done, and crashing finally. can't wait to see the others. XD

Crafty
Artist
65 comments
# 73   Posted: Sep 2 2014, 01:31 AM
Oh gee, I uploaded on Sunday and haven't checked Void since then, I'll guess I'd better email the pages too .__.

Wei Ingnan
Artist
597 comments
# 72   Posted: Sep 2 2014, 01:24 AM
with the exception of Slade I only have pages from the people who have commented here as having uploaded..more on how shameful that is later

I know there was at least one person whose pages were lost but I do not know whose pages those were(although I know what they looked like) if you uploaded before the deadline but did not state that here or e-mail your pages to me and Red then you need to do so A.S.A.P. .....and I already know who has logged in recently and when


Ahmed
Artist
29 comments
# 71   Posted: Sep 2 2014, 12:12 AM
I feel like ass. :( I had enough time to rush the lettering and coloring to turn something in but everything I've done with this comic in the last 3 hours has made me fall out of love with it. Which is a shame, I was really proud of it up til that point. I will have to be a Damn Dirty Default. Take my pencils. Take my pens. Burn my PC to the ground. I am not worthy of these tools.

I am looking forward to seeing everyone else's work though. I love everyone who finished, just so you know. You are wonderful people.

Evi
Artist
110 comments
# 70   Posted: Sep 2 2014, 12:01 AM
SUBMITTED AND EMAILED! Phew
I decided this was an opportunity for me to try something a little different... Hope you enjoy it! Can't wait to see everyone else's!

Pennydox
Artist
235 comments
# 69   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 11:39 PM
There can and will be only one winner......With such a large roster it will be neccesary for you to vote honestly and critically....not everyone can be a '10' or even a '7, 8 or 9' for that matter and I say that expecting the best work out of everyone.
s
Quote

Time to get SERIOUS with my score. My wrists are very tired right now, but I'll try my best to get to everyone here (and some past comics) for honest critique. Good luck all on your last stretch, Less than half an hour till impact!

Robosockmonkey
Artist
109 comments
# 68   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 11:24 PM
Uploaded and emailed... Excited to see what everyone came up with.

DeathlySilent
Artist
38 comments
# 67   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 10:24 PM
Uploaded and emailed!!! Good luck everyone! :)

Bobo
Web Dev
894 comments
# 66   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 10:14 PM
Welp, it's not great, but it's complete. I really didn't have my heart and soul in this like I wanted to, but I'm not going to make excuses for why I didn't submit anything, so you all get what you get. I hope you at least enjoy what's there, despite it being far from my best work art-wise. It was fun to come up with my main characters, at least. :)

I can't wait to see what the rest of you have done!

Symon_says
Artist
36 comments
# 65   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 06:37 PM
Yeah. I shouldn't have entered this...
Sorry guys. T_T

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 64   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 06:16 PM
Do you think many suffered from "Oh, it's so short, I have plenty of time"-brand procrastination?

Wubble
Think Tank
91 comments
# 63   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 05:50 PM
Fuk ya uploaded & emailed

Minteh
Artist
252 comments
# 62   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 04:35 PM
Uploaded and e-mailed!

Fed
Artist
162 comments
# 61   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 03:49 PM
My apologies, but i really didn't get anywhere with this and was planning to just take a loss on the chin, till i read Bobos ROUSING (.. and somewhat frightening) speech ; so uploaded are 3 inked pages from what was supposed to be a 5-page "Black metal Blues" ; I guess its (slightly) better than a default..

RobThing
Artist
84 comments
# 60   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 02:17 PM
Mine is uploaded, I'll email it out.

otakutaylor
Artist
179 comments
# 59   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 01:48 PM
Uploaded, and now emailed too. I hope everyone's shows up alright!
Oh and if you guys are interested, don't forget to write down what your current artist scores/ranks are at, so you can see how they've changed at the end of voting!

Atomicfish
Artist
116 comments
# 58   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 12:26 PM
Just uploaded and emailed mine.

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 57   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 12:25 PM
When I heard 'Black and Blue', I thought of the many, MANY times I was injured (and nearly died) as a child--in particular, that time I nearly drowned... So yeah, *I* think it fits the theme, and I can only hope ya'll agree.  It's the only idea I had.

Uploaded & emailed.  Hope you like it!

Wei Ingnan
Artist
597 comments
# 56   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 12:09 PM
it will be extremely helpful if EVERYONE would state here when they have uploaded AND would e-mail the pages to me and Red(make sure to include your username in the e-mail)...this will help us sort out and fix any issues that have or may occour

weiingnan@gmail.com

bdotscotts@gmail.com


Fearn
Artist
349 comments
# 55   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 11:45 AM
Animeshen: uploaded. Mine is based on a Native American folk tale I read as a kid. So, this time, the writing isn't on me lol.
Quote

Similar here - i used a scottish poem ;) not taken the theme literally, went for a crazy ride with symbolism :P if anyone is interested i can explain!!!... ;)

Sean Patrick Kelly
Artist
117 comments
# 54   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 11:09 AM
well I'm gonna say this now so i don't ruin tomorrows fun I'm not gonna upload my comic today. i'll post it just not on time. Whatever i'll say for why it'll be late is  irrelevant, but if anything just know art had to be pushed aside for career reasons.
I know before i said id post and never did but I've changed alot since then, and i will post my comic.

Shame, Shame all on me guys

G.Lo
Artist
103 comments
# 53   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 07:14 AM
AHHH IM SO EXCITED TO SEE ALL YOUR GUYS' STUUUUFFF!

Shen
Global Moderator
1282 comments
# 52   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 04:17 AM
uploaded. Mine is based on a Native American folk tale I read as a kid. So, this time, the writing isn't on me lol.

Energy
Artist
126 comments
# 51   Posted: Sep 1 2014, 12:16 AM
Uploaded.

EDIT:  Now e-mailed.

Red
Council
636 comments
# 50   Posted: Aug 31 2014, 10:10 PM
In addition to what Wei said, I wanted to add that if there are more upload issues to PLEASE let us know by:
1. Commenting HERE that you have a problem
2. Email Wei and I so we are aware

Please please double check your uploads just in case more strangeness happens!

I'd hate to not post a finished comic, so I'm hoping you all remembered to meet the requirements of this tournament ;) Good luck everyone, hope it all goes as smooth as possible.

Wei Ingnan
Artist
597 comments
# 49   Posted: Aug 31 2014, 08:51 PM
I am expecting great things from all of you....and will have little patience for anyone who defaults outright or somehow failed to follow the requirements....which will also result in a default.
You have had 4 weeks to create a comic representing your best efforts and at only 3-5 pages in length....that is literally 1.25 pages per week or 1 week to plan and 3 weeks at 1.6 pages a week.


As for the audience, when reading and voting I strongly urge you to first familiarize yourselves with the requirements for this event as well as my comments above.
http://entervoid.com/index.php?topic=12741.0
Creativity towards and application of the theme should play a large part in your considerations as well as comparisons to the other entries and individual success.
There can and will be only one winner......With such a large roster it will be neccesary for you to vote honestly and critically....not everyone can be a '10' or even a '7, 8 or 9' for that matter and I say that expecting the best work out of everyone.

I will personally be reviewing each and every comic before this event is posted so there may be a short delay in posting....so don't start chomping at the bit if that takes place.

It may also take some time to track down and arrange transportation to the home addresses of any artists that default or half-ass this

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 48   Posted: Aug 31 2014, 04:11 PM
Okay guys wish me luck, send positive vibes or whatever, 'cause I'm having scanner network problems.  It worked last week, I don't know what's wrong, but I'll keep at it.  :|

Update:  I had to physically MOVE my scanner to another location.  Apparently it has a crap wifi antenna.

Fearn
Artist
349 comments
# 47   Posted: Aug 31 2014, 02:09 PM
Omgggggggg I am glad I checked - my pages got deleted. So I re uploaded them (luckily had them on my email because i am on holiday now Away from laptop) but from the iPad but now the file names are all weird (numbered not in order). Drama drama drama ;)

Kevin Birtcher
Allfather
289 comments
# 46   Posted: Aug 31 2014, 08:18 AM
I believe it's fixed now, please check and re-upload pages as needed.

Bobo
Web Dev
894 comments
# 45   Posted: Aug 31 2014, 06:28 AM
I was actually not even aware of that particular issue! I'll look into the problem, because that is wacky!

Ahmed
Artist
29 comments
# 44   Posted: Aug 30 2014, 11:07 PM
Oh, could be I have the comic left over from before it got fixed.

I'm not reading any of these prematurely btw! Haha, tempting as it may be. I will say to whoever's thumbnails I saw, it looked pretty.

otakutaylor
Artist
179 comments
# 43   Posted: Aug 30 2014, 08:53 PM
is that still happening? I had deleted the random comic who was there way before when I checked it on my side, and had put up my own already since I finished yesterday.

Ahmed
Artist
29 comments
# 42   Posted: Aug 30 2014, 06:08 PM
Is the upload problem gonna be resolved before the deadline? I'm still getting someone else's comic on my upload page.

Fearn
Artist
349 comments
# 41   Posted: Aug 30 2014, 05:12 PM
Well I am done. And Rob is done as well i think :P so at least two guarantees lol.

Can't wait to read all these!

DeathlySilent
Artist
38 comments
# 40   Posted: Aug 30 2014, 03:22 PM
Lol I've never had off labor day since I started working! But I'll put something out. I've changed things so many times :(

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 39   Posted: Aug 30 2014, 12:59 PM
Really I just have to scan and letter mine... Which means I need to fight the hubs for the computer since he's off for labor day, but I think I can just send him out to mow the lawn (heh heh he).

Bobo
Web Dev
894 comments
# 38   Posted: Aug 30 2014, 08:00 AM
These are due Monday night at midnight MST! For you norteamericanos out there, that's Labor Day, so you have all day to make it happen! Some of you have participated in 24-hour comic day, so keep that in mind. If you can churn out 24 pages in 24 hours, you can churn out 3 pages in roughly 2 1/2 days!

I can't wait to see where everyone took the theme!

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 37   Posted: Aug 30 2014, 04:36 AM
Mintley: I'm on schedule to finish up by Sunday! I can't wait to see what the rest of you have cooked up!
Quote

I am too!

Minteh
Artist
252 comments
# 36   Posted: Aug 29 2014, 06:05 PM
I'm on schedule to finish up by Sunday! I can't wait to see what the rest of you have cooked up!

Hobbittastic
Artist
164 comments
# 35   Posted: Aug 28 2014, 07:43 PM
Only 4 days left! We can do it! I believe in us!!

Puzzlething
Artist
457 comments
# 34   Posted: Aug 28 2014, 10:17 AM
You can do it everybody! Don't give up!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxGRhd_iWuE

I wanna be buried in comics, I want the reading and critique to take me so long that the earth is dead and grey by the time I finish!

A Bad Idea
Artist
320 comments
# 33   Posted: Aug 28 2014, 04:07 AM
Trivia: A long, long, long time ago, 3 pages was the average length of a Void battle. James Stokoe used to kick ass and take names 3 pages at a time.

Do our ancestors proud.

Monday
Artist
933 comments
# 32   Posted: Aug 28 2014, 02:49 AM
Guys. Reading the comments for this thing is already interesting. Why dont ya'll actually... draw from that ?

I mean its 3 pages.

That's like 50 foxtrot strips.

A nichijou skit.

3 Webcomic Updates.

A whole arc of Oglaf

A kid's story.

A niel cicierega adaptation

A void comic.

Thresher
Artist
166 comments
# 31   Posted: Aug 27 2014, 01:38 PM
Bobo.

I love you.

Bobo
Web Dev
894 comments
# 30   Posted: Aug 27 2014, 01:11 PM
ATTENTION EVERYONE: You had DAMNED WELL better finish your comics! It's THREE FUCKING PAGES. You can do it. If you had to, you could blast that out in an hour. Obviously, we want to make something higher quality than that, but if you default, so help me God I swear I will beat your asses into the ground.

I say this because, despite my complete emotional breakdown around the time of August 11th, I WILL be submitting SOMETHING. Because I've defaulted once and that's more than enough. Because my last several comics have been incomplete in one form or another. Because it's THREE PAGES. And I can do that.

And if I can do it, so can you.

SO

FUCKING

DO IT.

Ahmed
Artist
29 comments
# 29   Posted: Aug 27 2014, 09:19 AM
Good golly gee, I am so fucked. Why do I always do this to myself? Time to blast some Eye of the Tiger and get this thing done!

Wubble
Think Tank
91 comments
# 28   Posted: Aug 26 2014, 01:22 AM
Wu AT-AT: I'm excite.

I WILL EXPECT NO DEFAULTS FROM ANY OF YOU. PREPARE FOR JUDGEMENT IF YOU DO.
Quote

Apparently I'm going to judge myself. Still not sure if going to finish..

Jetty Jay
Artist
151 comments
# 27   Posted: Aug 25 2014, 06:28 PM
I was home for a bit before collapsing to bed and had another go at this, but it's become abundantly clear I'm not going to finish by the deadline - I have housing issues at the moment, and as such I haven't been staying in place for very long to be able to draw (and when I have been home, it's usually just to sleep). I like what I'm doing with my comic and I'll be moving into my own place on the 6th - so I will finish. Some shit happened the day after the theme was announced though and everything turned to crap (including the death of my poor laptop) with the timing for me :(

Really sorry guys. I don't take defaults lightly (which is why I've put off resigning to it until now) but I can't see much of a way around it this time.

Red
Council
636 comments
# 26   Posted: Aug 20 2014, 06:47 AM
Don't have an idea? Make it about cats.

You're welcome.

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 25   Posted: Aug 19 2014, 05:56 AM
Alright, we're just past the half-way point.  I only had one idea.  I hope it's a good one.

Bobo
Web Dev
894 comments
# 24   Posted: Aug 11 2014, 06:16 PM
Barring some sort of divine intervention, I'm going to have to officially drop all of my balls on this one. I'm sorry, but I just can't do this right now.

Gregly
Artist
125 comments
# 23   Posted: Aug 11 2014, 04:36 PM
I still don't have an idea... shucks.

RobThing
Artist
84 comments
# 22   Posted: Aug 11 2014, 03:54 PM
Mine is done being written, I'm just struggling to find a good style to put it in, and trying to figure out how to pull it off to get the idea across.

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 21   Posted: Aug 11 2014, 03:19 PM
Fern: Nibs - ouch! What happened?

I havenot changed my mind at all, just really struggled to come up with something i was happy about. Gone through about 20 possible scenarios :P

But now i got one & im good to go :D
Quote

A one pound-ish iron basalt-ish rock launched by our new lawnmower collided with the outside of my right ankle just above where that little point sticks out.  Might as well have been a cannonball.  Yeah.  It could've been worse though.  If I hadn't been wearing my cowboy boots to work in it might've broken the ulna too.

Fearn
Artist
349 comments
# 20   Posted: Aug 11 2014, 02:29 PM
Nibs - ouch! What happened?

I havenot changed my mind at all, just really struggled to come up with something i was happy about. Gone through about 20 possible scenarios :P

But now i got one & im good to go :D

DeathlySilent
Artist
38 comments
# 19   Posted: Aug 11 2014, 10:23 AM
I've changed mine so many times ><.

Minteh
Artist
252 comments
# 18   Posted: Aug 10 2014, 08:51 PM
Shen that's exactly what's happened with me haha D: I had two main ideas and did a poll among my friends to decide which one, because I was equally invested. I'll do the second one later haha

Shen
Global Moderator
1282 comments
# 17   Posted: Aug 10 2014, 08:39 PM
The BenT One: Who else has changed their idea 3+ times already?
Quote
I decided my idea on the first day and still haven't drawn 1 line.
sorry about your bones, Nibbles ^^;

The Bent One
Artist
564 comments
# 16   Posted: Aug 10 2014, 06:50 PM
Who else has changed their idea 3+ times already?

Nibbles
Artist
192 comments
# 15   Posted: Aug 10 2014, 01:59 PM
Well, I just got a lovely excuse to stay in bed and draw.  Broken tibia.

Symon_says
Artist
36 comments
# 14   Posted: Aug 7 2014, 01:37 AM
Wow. Yeah, that looks like a lot of people! Woo!

Go for broke!

P.s. Good luck everyone!

Astro Sean
Approval Committee
318 comments
# 13   Posted: Aug 6 2014, 10:27 PM
This should be fun

Julz
Artist
371 comments
# 12   Posted: Aug 6 2014, 09:49 AM
I'm left! Muahahaha! I'll vote XD

Shen
Global Moderator
1282 comments
# 11   Posted: Aug 5 2014, 05:46 PM
I just realized with most of our active roster in this fight theres not alotta people left who can vote on it when we're done! XD GOOD LUCK EVERYONE this will be fun!

Minteh
Artist
252 comments
# 10   Posted: Aug 4 2014, 07:46 PM
actually one thing about this, shouldn't the "Extend" option be disabled?

The Bent One
Artist
564 comments
# 9   Posted: Aug 4 2014, 07:19 PM
I am hoping to see some esoteric stuff.

Wubble
Think Tank
91 comments
# 8   Posted: Aug 4 2014, 06:26 PM
I'm excite.

I WILL EXPECT NO DEFAULTS FROM ANY OF YOU. PREPARE FOR JUDGEMENT IF YOU DO.

Slagglle
Artist
61 comments
# 7   Posted: Aug 4 2014, 02:43 PM
Interesting. Good luck everyone. Can't wait to see how you all interpret the theme.

Fearn
Artist
349 comments
# 6   Posted: Aug 4 2014, 02:21 PM
SO EXCIIIIIIIIIIIIITEEEEEEEEEEE

Minteh
Artist
252 comments
# 5   Posted: Aug 4 2014, 10:50 AM
soooo excited, good luck to everyone, I look forward to what you all put up :D Now to get cracking on mine.

Pennydox
Artist
235 comments
# 4   Posted: Aug 4 2014, 07:56 AM
oh my, this is going to be a doozy to critique when it's over. Good luck everyone *salute*
(and yes I WILL critique every 29 of you when it's over)

RobThing
Artist
84 comments
# 3   Posted: Aug 4 2014, 07:51 AM
Ohhhhhh interesting. I wasn't expecting a color theme.

THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING.

Prepare for a good whipping.

Fed
Artist
162 comments
# 2   Posted: Aug 4 2014, 06:33 AM
Hah! Get ready to be beaten... "Black and Blue!"

.. sorry, i will go draw now..

Bobo
Web Dev
894 comments
# 1   Posted: Aug 4 2014, 05:43 AM
So just in case you didn't read the title, the theme for our Short-N-Sweet comic is "Black and Blue." Don't worry, I didn't get any unfair heads up. I posted this as soon as I got the email from Wei.

I'll allow Wei to fill in any other details I may have missed. Good luck to everyone! I hope you all have fun and learn a lot from this; I'm sure I will!

EDIT: All requirements and rules are available here:http://entervoid.com/index.php?topic=12741.0
Failure to meet ALL requirements or follow ALL rules will result in a default or disqualification....so do yourself a favour and read them again.

Also when it comes time, voters should appraise themselves of requirements and consider the creativity used by artists in meeting said points....and then vote accordingly.

Good Luck


Comic Details -

 
Type: Artist Match
Drawing Time: 4 weeks
Ended: Sep 10th, 2014
Votes Cast: 16
Page Views: 3811
Winner: Evi
 

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