Fight or Flight / Andy Heller

Fight or Flight — Andy Heller

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Icon for Andy Heller
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Critiques & Comments
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Atomicfish
Artist
115 comments
# 15   Posted: Jan 18 2014, 09:46 PM
Oh wow, this got more comments then I thought it would. Thanks for reading my dumb little comic and thank you all for your advice. Trust me, I'm writing everything down that needs improvement in my notebook so that hopefully the next thing I do will be an improvement.  

Puzzlething
Artist
457 comments
# 14   Posted: Jan 17 2014, 08:52 PM
                  The colour pallete for your comic is really interesting, but sometimes the colours you use for your shadows are not that interesting. Every so often it seems like you're just shading stuff with a darker version of the base colour. It mostly seems to happens in blue areas I think? Is it because you're generally using blue as your shadow colour? You use a red-ish brown for shadowing stuff like characters skin and hair, so you totally get varying your shadow colour, just make sure you're a little more consistent with it.

            You're buildings are still a little simplistic, just a few interesting 3 dimensional details would make them feel a little less like boxes. Stuff like corner details, interesting window frames, drains, that stuff on roof edges, external stairs and landings, entrance ways etc etc. Collect building elements in your sketchbooks and head. Think of them like pieces of clothing. All you have to do is hang them on your boxes and you've got delightful new characters in your comic! Big, boxy, unmoving characters, but still characters!

                I actually totally got the ending, and I really liked it. While maybe you could've eased into it a little bit, I also have a really slooooow sense of timing, so I try not to offer advice about that. Cause I'm like always wrong. But it was great, the city prevents her from leaving, and she takes the energy she mustered up to leave and does something else with it. I always totally imagined Void as a difficult place to leave. The story was wonderful, how there's a feeling of everything building up to this moment.

            I love me some cluttered backgrounds, and your comic is no exception dude. All those shots of the messed up city, and the great pile of Andy's stuff. Yeeaaaaah! I just love searching through scenes like that, picking out the story and everything.

   You shouldn't feel so bad about yourself or your art. It's a great comic yo, and I always look forward to your comics. They always make me feel.

Mister Kent
Artist
958 comments
# 13   Posted: Jan 16 2014, 05:05 PM
Overall I really enjoyed this, and it was cool to see Andy in action again! I definitely thought the last page was the best use of the vibrant colors, and the doggy suit was just precious!!!

The first page struck me as odd--I couldn't shake the feeling that the destroyed buildings looked like giant, broken plastic toys instead of destroyed buildings. I like that you included little details, like the piles of debris and that cool overturned car, but the structures themselves looked off. For reference look at lots of urban decay pictures. I do like the way you drew the debris on page 4, though!

I will be copying your "Mr. Butt" billboards in the future. Keep up the good work!!

Kozispoon
Artist
1211 comments
# 12   Posted: Jan 16 2014, 04:05 PM
Ahhh, more Andy <3 Gotta love her. Not gonna lie, I am shocked she made it out of her apartment. Although, there is some humor to be had in the fact that her excursion ends up with her missing the party and only seeing the aftermath. also, Mimi billboard! Loved it! Mimi's magic what? Magic Girdles? Magic Speakeasy? I'll never know- damn you VOID disaster!!

I really dig your establishing shot on the first page, but I will agree with the comments already made that I'd love to see you push that leveled city more. Some dust! Haze! Grit and spit lady. Bring the pain, I know ya got it in ya. Speaking of pain, I am heartbroken poor Otis is so messed up. What happened that got him those manly scars? Has animal cruelty gone too far? We may never know, but now Andy's dog looks badass.

The discussion with the Grandmother in the hospital was sobering. I could be getting it wrong, but it seems like she has dementia or alzheimers and doesn't even realize it's her granddaughter she's speaking to. Maaan, way to pull on the heartstrings. So glad trusty Otis found that blanket. Makes me wonder if old miss Viol was in a Void city hospital. It was back in December. How long was she there? Was she still wondering about Andrea when the bomb dropped?

I love the Twilight zone twist where Andrea leaves Void city only to come back to it. There is no escape! I agree with some on the commentators that the sudden store opening felt a bit jarring as it wasn't hinted at or alluded to in the story. I expected it as we've talked about it before, so I was looking for that hook in the first pages. I'm guessing it was the blanket, but why not open a blanket shop? Wait, do those exist?

All in all though, its great you fed off Toro and Hiemie's shenanigans and showed us what rich Andy is up to- and also using the design of the storefront like you said! I dig you gave it your own twist too. Way to make it your own! I look forward to seeing Andy out in society. Bring on those battles!

brownkidd
Artist
18 comments
# 11   Posted: Jan 15 2014, 07:57 AM
Loved it, especially the fourth page with all the setpiece detail in the top panel and the way the blanket flows creating sort of a collage/montage thing. Well done!

EyeAmPhibian
Artist
97 comments
# 10   Posted: Jan 15 2014, 12:49 AM
I actually really like the vibrancy of your colours despite what the others think! Maybe its the grey and the colour mixing that make it stand out?

It was a really nice read aswell.

A problem though is, that the amount of detail you put into the surroundings doesn't really seem to vary depening on how close or far you are from things. The city on the first page, lots of details, nice. The Hospital, blank walls, not so great... Only takes a few minutes to add a few get well cards, a trolley with some drinks, a bedside table.

Overall though it has a very nice vibe about it. Good work!

RobThing
Artist
84 comments
# 9   Posted: Jan 12 2014, 05:51 PM
I like that ugly blanket  *_*
And the dog in the little outfit is super duper adorable (I imagine him also with a little top hat and/or a monocle, but that's just me).

I don't have anything crit-wise to say that Le Fred didn't, but I wanted to reiterate two of his points particular:

1- Sad family and then boom! Shop! What? I don't get the jump. Maybe if like, there was some dialogue in there of the old lady being all, "And I always wanted her to open a shop", then opening the shop would be a natural conclusion, as a payoff to that.

2-The flashbacks. Because I'm pretty sure that some of this is supposed to be flashback, but I don't know which,  and what part is present tense? I'd think, yes, the destroyed city thing is present tense, except again theres a shop, and why would she open a shop in a destroy city, but the city didn't seem destroyed?
Everything is done in such bright pretty color, maybe if you made the flashback parts less saturated, or even grayscale? Something really obvious. Because I am not quite as awesome as Le Fred, and as such couldn't figured which bits were flashback.

Hobbittastic
Artist
164 comments
# 8   Posted: Jan 11 2014, 04:27 PM
This was super cute! Also I can relate being in Cleveland and not waning to go outside ;-;
I agree with a lot of what Le Fred said, so I won't reiterate all that. Also, I'm guess she opens up the store so quickly with the check for "killed your house"? And I don't mind the panel thickness, but the word bubbles should be a little thinner.
You're getting so much better, but watch out for drawing straight/angled lines; maybe try out firealpaca, it has a really good feature for lines in all sorts of angles (and it's free).

Random observations: Mr "But", Clown Princess in the store window

Other than that it was pretty good and I can't wait to see more!

Fred
Artist
550 comments
# 7   Posted: Jan 11 2014, 11:17 AM
Always happy to see your comics!

While I'm usually all for intense colours, the strange mixture of those Saturated colours with the dark sloppy shady doesn't really work for the most part.(the last story page is nice, the colours are less intense and the shading a bit more interesting) It's especially a problem for the ruins, where all those potentially clashing colors are and it muddles what would otherwise be some decent colour composition. Talking of composition, in the first page, the eye is really drawn to that empty spot in the middle of the street, that's where Andy should be instead of hidden under, with the rubble.(unless you wanted to make her lost in an oppressive ruin, but then there's a whole lot of other things that make this not work either, and you'd still need to center the composition around her) Back to colour, page four probably works the best, I think because you allow the brightness to come through more. Also, the bridge hole doesn't look too big. I don't know what kind of bridge was the, but it seems like she could almost jump it. I also want to give you some props for tackling the ruined city, at which you did a decent job, though the atomic fish building is probably the weak point, what with its rounded roof corners and overall lack of destruction, inconsistent with the rest of the buildings ( though I really like the atomic fish). Also why is there shadow on the top side(down side) of the car? That makes no sense. And as just a suggestion, you could have made the streets a bit more deformed and broken as well, after all, not just the buildings get affected by destruction, the buildings are not just gently put on top of the ground, they are part of it, everything is connected together, everything BREAKS together. As for what Bent said, I think the main problem I have with your bubbles here, is how thick they are, also your panels, which are also a bit inconsistent in their thickness. Try to go with about the same thickness as your lines. I don't really mind that they're not hand-drawn though.
I like the story with the grandma and all that (flashbacks within flashbacks!) but I was rather confused as to the rest of the story. Where is she at the beginning if not in Void City and why is it also destroyed? If she is in Void, why is she taking the bus TO Void? Was that also a flashback? That seems the most reasonable, but the fact that she's leaving and then in the bus seems too natural of a sequence to interpret as a flashback, and then I thought the last story page followed from the bus scene, because, again, follows too naturally, like the bus stops  at Void, but Void ain't there, Andy is left in front of the crater... makes sense. Although what she says makes a whole lot more sense if you understand the bus sequence as separate. Anyway, make sure you make clear what is a flashback and what isn't. You don't need fancy visual cues, though the lighter backgrounds in page 3 and the black on in page 4 did help as clear signs, but mostly the fact that the narrative was clearly interrupted is what marks these as flashbacks. Lastly, I'm not a big fan of the very last page. It's a nice direction to take, but I just don't feel like the rest of the comic was leading up to this at all. You spend the comic on how there's nothing left and her family and it's all melancholy and then BAM! She opens a shop? If you really wanted that ending, you should have spent the comic on the city's rebuild and her really accepting to be part of city life or something.

Overall, I liked it! Especially once I figured out that one bit of flashback business, it's a very nice, touching, little story.
And despite some issues, really didn't look bad; You're getting there! As always, I hope to see more soon.

The Bent One
Artist
564 comments
# 6   Posted: Jan 11 2014, 07:06 AM
It's happening! Void City is rebuilding!

other than general practice, I'm trying to think of other things you should work on to improve. Honestly, this is a more complete comic than some that go up here, and I love seeing stuff in color.

I would actually suggest that you draw the word bubbles by hand. They feel too rigid and graphic, like they were slapped on at the last minute. What I usually do is put the text in to the page, organize it where I want to to be, then I draw in the word bubbles last.

Crafty
Artist
65 comments
# 5   Posted: Jan 3 2014, 06:49 PM
Yes yes! I am excite!

Kozispoon
Artist
1211 comments
# 4   Posted: Jan 3 2014, 02:11 PM
Oh boy oh boy. Bring it- or you know, run away! As long as there's comics at the end of it all!

The Bent One
Artist
564 comments
# 3   Posted: Jan 3 2014, 02:04 PM
color me EXCITED

MyHatsEatPeople
Artist
408 comments
# 2   Posted: Jan 3 2014, 01:58 PM
I think you mean

OH YES.

Atomicfish
Artist
115 comments
# 1   Posted: Jan 3 2014, 01:56 PM
Oh no.

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Beyond Battle
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Jan 17th, 2014
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