Oh man webtoon format! I'm so happy someone is finally doing it up! Are you just messing around with it for your intro, or are al ofl this character's comic gonna be like this? If you stick with it, I hope you try adding some panels in there, though this is pretty cool too.
There's not much for me to critique, cause this is a really solid, quick comic. The lighting in the daylight scenes on the second page could be way bolder though. In that situation, the light forms would be way stronger and harder edged, and there'd totally be cast light on the floors and wall, as well as some heavy cast shadows to go with them. You might've also played around with some cast light from the laptop, though I dunno if that's even really necessary.
Also, there should be compression in Baku's leg's in a few spots, like where her butt meets the floor and where her legs press against her feet. As it is, it's like she's made out of hard plastic, or sorta floating.
I really really like the pacing, and the feeling as I scroll down each page. It's really cinematic!
Intro Story / Baku the Explosionist
Critiques & Comments
# 8
Posted:
Jan 8 2014, 04:37 PM
# 7
Posted:
Jan 3 2014, 01:01 PM
WHOOPS, page 2 was supposed to be the width of page 1. My bad!
# 6
Posted:
Jan 3 2014, 11:57 AM
For readability , I would suggest sizing down the images. Otherwise you have something interesting going on where your panels take up the whole window, almost like I'm watching still frames from a show. But I could totally see all your brush strokes and everything comes out as bombastic and unfocused, leaving me nowhere to rest my eyes on. So I'm not /convinced/ that you chose to post giant images for the effect of it.
# 5
Posted:
Jan 3 2014, 10:08 AM
Really nice shading! For consistency, since you have such great highlights, make sure to pay attention to the shadows. See page two on the grenades and boxes. If your intention was not to add shadows, usually objects like that which are closer to the viewer would be darker and/or more saturated.
# 4
Posted:
Jan 3 2014, 04:45 AM
I am totally digging the transition of events in your pages! Really nice gradual build up from the news paper features as they burn away to reveal the destruction. It definitely shows that you had fun working on these pages. Definitely looking forward to more.
# 3
Posted:
Jan 2 2014, 04:45 AM
Coil would have a word with you
# 2
Posted:
Jan 2 2014, 01:34 AM
This looks great, love the character! About time someone created a "terrorist-for-hire"
# 1
Posted:
Jan 1 2014, 07:24 PM
ah, shes in! I like the colours, and the sort of infinite canvas long pages, I think it works for this story! lol "Balu". poor Baku. can't wait to see her fight!
Beyond Battle
Ended:
Jan 8th, 2014
Votes Cast:
25
Page Views:
1727
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