Congrats on a big heaping helping of JPatch awesomeness. I always like to see where you'll take Johnny's story because its always surprising and crazy. I am impressed with the improvements I see in your art, and there were some really cool touches throughout. I agree with Tinman--you made the cityscape really interesting, and it felt very lived-in.   Keep up the great work Jet.

Thanks so much for all the feedback! Thank god for the digital media which will make some of these fixes possible without too much issue. Hopefully the final print will live up to expectations

I decided to just go through and read all of the comics, and I'm glad I did! Despite the unfinished nature of this comic, the storyline totally drew me in, and I can't wait to see the finished product and just more work from you in general! I would say that you need to be careful with your poses and anatomy from time to time, and there were spots, like the cityscape page, where my eye didn't know quite where to go, but I love your style and the personality of your characters. I can't wait to see more!

Oh Miss Jetster Goth Dayum Fekkin Jay-  What we've got here is a rollicking good time, slapdash Johnny Patch gettin tore up from the flo' up. I dig the orange offsetting JP's blue hues, only wish it could have presided throughout the rest of the comic, still your blacks are strong enough to hold their own. Dat cityscape. I'm impressed with the details, and overall grit of its streets, it captures alot of life and  care was clearly applied. There are some hasty bits here and there and some inconsistency in quality and layouts but it suits the story, and I applaud your experimental willingness.  The suddenly hot Velma scientist chica summoned up visions of Rampage world tour. The whole comic elicits a palpable sense of grunge and appropriate madness, this feels like a zine you'd find in a back alley vinyl shop, so I can't fault your presentation- all it lacks is a more photocopied/newsprinty texture to complete the experience. RAwk on witcho badseff.

     I don't think there's anything wrong with wibble-wobble, and lots of great backgrounds are done entirely without a ruler. All Over Coffee is all totally freehand and it's amaaazzziiiing. There are problems with your backgrounds totally unassociated with that though. You have some perpsective issues on pages 6 and 10, and on the bottom of page 3 and 5. On 3 5 and 10, the horizon is set way way too high, and on page 6 it seems almost like you're caught halfway between 1 point and 2 point perspective. None of the horizontal parallels seem to be receding towards a vanishing point, but they're also not drawn strait like you would in one-point. Almost none of the buildings further in the back are drawn in perspective either.

     A lot of the features and details of stuff in your backgrounds have no width, and take up no space. They're like flat designs painted onto stuff. Remember everything has width, and even if something is really far away you can suggest that width with line weight, if not by just drawing it out.

     I think the city is way too uniform when it comes to color. I think you could've worked in that pink and yellow from the laboratory and gotten something really acrid and amazing, while still maintaining the contrast between Johnny and his setting. You could also put some shadows in the backgrounds, but I'm unsure whether or not you want to use shadows and lights in the this comic. It's kind of inconsistent. You have the doctor and the aliens affected by light and shadow, but then nothing else. I think you need to swing one way or the other, and make the color/rendering work for that choice. Also, Have you thought about using that incredibly sweet filter on the last page throughout the entire comic? I thought it was pretty great.

  Nit-picky stuff. On page 3 is the only spot you used some soft gradation, and it sticks out badly. Also I think you could figure out a better way to draw fire, all the long hairy lines inside the fire feels sloppy.

  It's an awesome comic dude, and I love Johnny Patch! His expressions always make me laugh. The giant isometric city-scape on page 9 is THE BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESTTTT, it must've murdered you even getting it to that point. Seriously I can't even tell you how much I love stuff like that, I just press my nose up against the screen and try to find all the little details. More people need to make b-movie comics, because this was great. Great stuff!

I'm of course no art-teacher so you shouldn't take what I say THAT seriously I can see why over-using a ruler can be a bad thing too (especially as there exists no straight lines in nature), but perhaps a little LESS wibblie-wobblie next time, enough to keep the LSD-"the walls are melting"-effect" at bay

As for the text it just that it the words  move too much "up and down" for my liking, but readability is no problem

Thanks for that feedback... I feel awkward approaching it though because I hate being this defensive, but the freehand lines are concious decision. I often used a ruler to get the angles how I wanted them in pencils and put it away for inking. I remember getting feedback on one of my first comics here saying that straight lines wouldn't really suit me so I have kind of stuck with it

It could be that I just didn't pull it off right, but I am not sure how I would go about doing it in that case... AT LEAST if it's effecting the readability of the speech bubbles or visual storytelling that's definitely something I should look at. Are there any specific places where it really did pull you out of the comic, or is it just a general thing?

Thanks for taking the time to read my comic and leaving feedback, even if I seem all over-defensive. I appreciate it

Interdasting and so much promise.. I love how you put so much effort into the backgrounds and surroundings, all those little details and doo-daads (in lack of better word..) really makes your comic come to life - the "overview" panel (page 9) is a perfect example, even if it is somewhat unfinished - as it is a work in progress, I'll look past the colors suddenly stopping and the somewhat unfinished panels.. BUT.. a ruler would do you a world of good; your text jumps up and down within the speech-bubbles and every straight line isn't.. specially with buildings and stuff in the background it gets hard to accept it when the lines wibbly-wobblies all across the page. So more straight lines next time and keep up the good work!

I'm not sold on his age but he is definitely a teenager haha. As for Johnny being an alien... he doesn't really have a 'canon' so a Gypsy curse or a clone are just as likely to be legitimate explanations for his skin colour, please don't take this comic as gospel haha.

Seeing as I have little room to move, do you think it would be a little more stretched out and work better if that final panel of Johnny being a hero was its own page, and I spent the rest of that space showing him beating aliens? Would that work for pacing or should there still be more? It would mean that the final two pages weren't a spread but I think I'm OK with that.

ah, so hes an alien! lol! but now that hes destroyed the aliens how will he ever knowwwww... is he really 16? I thought he was older... theres a lot to like about this though, I like that huge cityscape panel, thats way impressive though I wish you had finished it, I can only imagine it in the expressive, vibrant colours you like you use. The writing is fun, dig the 80's sci-fi horror theme haha! though I agree with, like how the chemicals should have more visibly burned him (also omg, "Dr. Serious", who becomes a hottie when she takes off her glasses- CLASSIC!) I wish the last page could have been stretched out, what should be the entire third act is a single page and its such a shame because I would have liked to see more of an awesome alien battle and the consequences of that. But anyhow, brilliant work, I greatly enjoyed reading it!

Thanks for the feedback! We were limited to 10-15 pages for the whole comic so that is partially to blame for some of the story's rush, but it's good to know where I should try and change things and perhaps slot one or both of the two spare pages I have in (I'd like to stick within the limit because it hits my printing budget!)

Some of it is also that this is heavily based on awful B-movie plots and I kind of like the wtf thing you get out of it. Mission accomplished . I'll still fix things like giving more time to the victory and making it a little clearer that Johnny got burned, and fixing up page 6 (though only the two bendy foreground buildings are made up and just have windows, the rest is sort of Melbourne's skyline with a few things moved around and added in - are you just referring to the foreground ones or should I take some more creative liberties on the skyline maybe?). Also asking about moutres de frais, I had a friend's boyfriend who is French translate for me but I may have misread his handwriting.

Colours will fix a lot too I think, as you said. Especially the moon thing haha, thank you for pointing that out.

Cheers!

Hahaha, what the hell are moutres de frais? It's a nice comic, and that page of the city is pretty sweet, but some things could use to be clearer, like what the deal is with those aliens exactly, or like, Patch says he got burned by the chemicals, but we don't see that happening at all, the chemicals just spill up and mix that somehow calls the aliens? And at the end, you try to make a 'haha no got you, the earth is actually burning' but we don't get to really have the victory enough for it to work, it would have been nice to take the time to actually see him win and be celebrated, right now it's happening too fast on a single page and it becomes a bit confusing as to what you were trying to do. I f anything, it feels rushed. So does page 6, where patch is a giant and buildings are made of nothing but wobly windows. I also thought that the head was the helm of one of the ships, because of the way it's on the moon and the way the moon is drawn. The places where you apply yourself are really nice, but still, lots of what looks like rushed work. keep working, if anyhting, I think your colors are nice and should fix some things once everywhere.

Alright, I've officially done as much as I'm gonna do before this deadline! Consider it a preview of a work I'm definitely going to be printing and selling (all pages are here, but two are not completely inked and all but 4 pages and one panel are uncoloured. Also missing epic front and back covers). Uploaded with thumbs sent to Angie

This better have SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE EROTICA. Tasmania better have inspired you.

IM SO EXCITED. AND I JUST CANT HIDE IT

yay! Because you can never get enough of Johnny Patch!

Deadline... To be adjusted haha. This is due June 7th at latest.

I am doing this for my course, but seeing as it features Johnny - it's nice to have the school deadline on me here too. Plus this will be the only place I have a digital copy for free. This is a one shot and like pretty much all Johnny stories, there isn't any 'canon' to be taken away from it.