Invitational Tournament 2012: Round 2 / Max, Maximus vs. GaoShou

Invitational Tournament 2012: Round 2 / Max, Maximus vs. GaoShou

Invitational Tournament 2012: Round 2 — Max, Maximus vs. GaoShou

by AxeLord

591 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4

Crit level: No preference

570 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4

Crit level: No preference

Critiques & Comments
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# 11   Posted: Apr 29 2012, 09:37 PM
Axelord, your layouts feel like they're a bit disjointed. At the end of the day, you can layout a comic in whatever fashion you want, but at some point, you need to lead the readers' eye to where it has to look next in a subtle, but clear, easy to read fashion. In this, I didn't know where I was supposed to go next & that split second of 'wait a second, where...?' is enough to take me out of what's happening. If you can't signify to the reader where they need to look next, your best bet is to keep things going in the more traditional setup: left to right, then down. The down, then upper right then down is counter intuitive to the way we've all learned to read. And the linework felt sparse without some toning.

Feelsink, it was fairly sketchy & hard to make out at times. but i think you've got skills, so just try to balance your time better next time.

# 10   Posted: Apr 28 2012, 04:49 AM
isnt it cool how close this battle is?!? WOOO!!

Riding on the razors edge lol.

# 9   Posted: Apr 28 2012, 02:56 AM
ty for the advice.. yea it was pretty obvious i ran outta steam near the end.. i tried for the rough look
heh heh i have always had trouble with making things clear clear.. arghhh

newayss thanks!

isnt it cool how close this battle is?!? WOOO!!

# 8   Posted: Apr 26 2012, 05:57 AM
Thanks for the input everyone, and for those yet to post.

(Begin list of BS'ery)

I approach my work with the intent to color it, and to use that color to exemplify details that I don't want lines to do. I produce these comics full digital when I am far better and faster traditionally (no scanner at the moment), out of silly pride mostly. I have an idea in mind for how I want my style to end up, but I'm just not good enough to get there fast enough. It's very frustrating. I have nothing against black and white comics, they're just not what I see myself doing. I don't really give any thought to blacks and tone shading because of it. Perhaps I'll just need to give in to the fact that I'm just not the level of skill necessary for the results I demand.

A middle ground must be met it seems.

# 7   Posted: Apr 25 2012, 09:06 PM
AxeLord-Looking good, I think your linework is coming along nicely. I know time isn't really a luxury you have at the moment, but down the line it would be good to consider some simple toning or just some simple black shading here and there to make things feel less empty.

feelsink-artistically this was weaker than your previous entry, I think you were off to a good start on the first page but it sort of started to fall apart as it went on. I'd like to see what you do with a longer deadline because there's some nice things like good camera work in there.

# 6   Posted: Apr 25 2012, 02:29 PM
AxeLord: Nice work, man. I find Max's list of abilities to be a little much, but the fact that he's always employed them in reserved and interesting ways is great. The lines are clean, the action is clear... I think the only thing holding you back now is backgrounds and maybe adding a few more details. All in all, though, a great showing.

feelsink: I'm sorry, I found this to be confusing and very unfinished. I initially didn't even notice that Max was in it at all - I thought he was just more Hobo Charlie. I would like to see your work more refined in the future. Also, the fact that she spontaneously became a vampire was VERY confusing, and more than likely has thrown your opponents for a loop. So, aim for clarity and continuity, and I think you've got the skills to go places!

# 5   Posted: Apr 25 2012, 02:15 PM
Axe: Your lines are very clean and crisp. I admire that a lot. However, I think you would benefit from shading of some sort. Your lines look like they're ready to have some coloring put behind them, but you could also use some hatching or more blacks if you feel you could do it well. There's a lot of white space that could be filled in, aside from that though I really like how it looks.

Feel: Your stuff is very sketchy, but I still found your comic pretty entertaining. It made me laugh which is a big plus. Try to work on cleaning up your art a little and making it look a bit more polished (solid black lines, no outlines that shouldn't be visible) but keep your sense of humor. ;)

Overall they were both fun to read for different reasons, though I was a little lost. I'll probably read up more on the characters and then read these comics again.

# 4   Posted: Apr 25 2012, 12:15 PM
AxelLord: This was a huge improvement over your last round's comic I think! The lines are super crisp, the story is pretty darn clear and the panelling is smooth and easy for me to follow. I really enjoyed your entry and scored you high for quality. I think that colour or grey would have really helped separate things out, and even though the BG's are minimal I think it adds to the overall mood and surrealism.

Feelsink: Your sketchy style puts me off a little because so many of your beautiful details get lost in the noise of your sketch. At the same time, it gives the piece lots of flow and action. And who can resist your sense of humor...winning by biting another competitor on the nose? Your facial expressions are wonderful but sometimes it's hard to tell which characters are which because of all the sketchy lines.

Good work both of you.

# 3   Posted: Apr 24 2012, 09:37 PM
Pages uploaded

Just wanted to add that Life decided to give me a swift kick in the pants over the week I was doing this. I intended to color it, that didn't pan out. Also, the final page is sorely incomplete. We'll see.

# 2   Posted: Apr 18 2012, 10:43 AM
i have updated her fears!


It will be fun battling your character as well! GLHF!

# 1   Posted: Apr 17 2012, 06:10 AM
Oh my, what an opponent! Feelsink you have a wonderful character. I enjoyed reading your first round. I feel so challenged integrating her into a story with Max. This will be good. Does she have a terrible fear of something/one/place?

Good luck, have fun!

Comic Details -

Type: Tournament Match
Drawing Time: 1 week
Ended: Apr 29th, 2012
Votes Cast: 34
Page Views: 1007
Winner: AxeLord

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