Kars and Elle vs. Miette and Flintlock

Kars and Elle vs. Miette and Flintlock

Kars and Elle vs. Miette and Flintlock

Icon for KarsIcon for Elle52%
358 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3Page 4Page 5Page 6Page 7Page 8Page 9

Crit level: No preference


by endjoi

Icon for MietteIcon for Flintlock48%
330 points
Page 1Page 2Page 3

Crit level: No preference




Critiques & Comments
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Rtv!
Artist
603 comments
# 12   Posted: Nov 26 2010, 08:46 PM
Tdk:
RoflQu said it best soooo, echo i shall not much. I was pretty confused at the first half, it got more clear during the elevator scene. I liked the silence, angles and pacing you chose for it.
One elevator, 2 people, 2 guns 1 bullet. I dunno... that is just fukking bad ass! :D

Endjoi - That was cute and pretty funny. Not bad at all for a last minute save.
Certainly entertained me for it's short format :D

E.W. Schneider
Artist
1060 comments
# 11   Posted: Nov 25 2010, 12:12 AM
tdkgunghoul: Hey, Round 2-a-go-go! I really loved that title page with the words on the hospital. Really cool to have the words floating on the buildings. It reminded me of that show, Fringe.

However, you need to still work on your handwriting or adopt fonts, because it's rough feeling. Maybe try writing lines in pencil and doing it at a nice readable size, because it's really important that you work on that aspect of your art if you're not gonna use fonts.

Your backgrounds feel like they suffered a bit in this comic. You need to practice perspective more, because the hospital building had some real funky lines that kind of felt arbitrary as opposed to planned and correct. Page 2's "line" background around Kars is REALLY distracting and doesn't seem to serve any purpose that wouldn't be better expressed by blank backgrounds or just shadows. Page 4's final panel REALLY kills me, because these swirls are just all over the place and then you wrote stuff on the back of Kars' head.

I REALLY liked the scene where the elevator was there with Flintlock and Elle, that was confusing at first but once we got to the end of it, the allegory was absolutely delicious. A very interesting take on 'near-death' or 'death'. You had some nice writing this tournament and I liked this scene the most. I especially liked the start of page 8 with Flintlock falling back, that was a really cool scene.

You need to work on your people more, it feels like you use a lot of stock features on your faces instead of real variables.

I know when I invited you in to this tournament, I promised you that your schedule probably wasn't going to be a problem, but here you are, moving to the semi-finals! So, I guess I owe you an apology and a hope that you're going to give what you can afford to give during your exams. Good luck next round, man.

Endjoi: Man, I was going to complain at you for this NaNoWriMo thing, because I thought it was some anime or video game. But, after learning what it really is, I can't stay all that mad. I can definitely respect ambitions or interest in writing.

I really like your paper choice. I think having the skin tone already there saves you a lot of work and it really does look nice against your colored pencils. Once again, your little people are extremely cute and the little strips are better than a default, I suppose.

I guess in the end, I am disappointed, if only because I really liked your redesign for Flintlock. However, there'll be Month of the Deads and opportunities to use her. I hope we don't have to wait for you to participate in the site again for another few years, because it'd be great to see you flesh out and use Miette or any other of your characters.

I hope to see you battling soon.

Ten Dead Kings
Artist
269 comments
# 10   Posted: Nov 23 2010, 08:39 AM
Angie: it's metaphoricaaal   ~(@3@)~ or not.

but yeah, maybe some explanation is in order: from the start, i wanted this to be the direct aftermath for round 1,
where Elle gets shot. So Elle/Flint is actually both trying to justify to Charon (the smoking guy) who gets to
return to life (the elevator, as a stand-in for the journey across the River Styx). Since they're both shooters,
well, one thing led to another. And it's all happening after her operation (offscreen), the part in the movies where
the doctors go "I've done all I could. It's up to her now to pull through."

Kars/Miette is just that, Kars telling a story.

So it's 2 different stories really, just taking place at the same hospital at around the same time frame. or not.

Edit: yeah,I'll try  better text next time.

Angie
Council
1937 comments
# 9   Posted: Nov 23 2010, 08:20 AM
tdkgunghoul-I'm glad to see you working on your backgrounds and your humans are looking better. I did however have a very hard time reading this because the text was very hard to read. I think digital lettering would have worked a lot better and probably would have saved you some time. I think the story was fun but it jumped around a little too much. Like Kars is telling a story and I thought the story was about Elle/Flint in addition to Kars/Miette but then it turns out the Elle/Flint part is all a dream and I got confused.

Endjoi-This was cute but there's really not much I can say as it's clear you just didn't have time.

Ten Dead Kings
Artist
269 comments
# 8   Posted: Nov 20 2010, 06:08 PM
I saw it somewhere on the internet. Sorry about that.


William_Duel
Community Manager
930 comments
# 7   Posted: Nov 20 2010, 01:59 PM
I'm just gonna ask this: Tdk, why did you spell it caek consistently?  Is it some meme?  I must know.

endjoi
Artist
77 comments
# 6   Posted: Nov 19 2010, 09:22 PM
Sorry, I nearly defaulted this one.  super rush job, NaNoWriMo ate my brain.  seriously.  

Ten Dead Kings
Artist
269 comments
# 5   Posted: Nov 19 2010, 07:42 PM
UPLOADED FINALLY

oh, last panel on last page is filler.

Also, nothing gets blown up, no car crashes, no giant monsters,
mostly words.

Angie
Council
1937 comments
# 4   Posted: Nov 19 2010, 07:19 AM
Good luck! Looking forward to this

Ten Dead Kings
Artist
269 comments
# 3   Posted: Nov 6 2010, 05:18 PM
Let's rock.

endjoi
Artist
77 comments
# 2   Posted: Nov 6 2010, 01:44 PM
curiouser and curiouser.  I'm neck deep in NaNoWriMo, but I will put up a good show, I promise!

E.W. Schneider
Artist
1060 comments
# 1   Posted: Nov 6 2010, 07:42 AM
Try your best, you two! This will be terrific!

Comic Details -

 
Type: Tournament Match
Drawing Time: 2 weeks
Ended: Nov 26th, 2010
Votes Cast: 21
Page Views: 1115
Winner: Ten Dead Kings and Ten Dead Kings
 

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