Man, I am consistently impressed by your ambition.You don't shy away from hard angles or subjects to draw, and I can see every comic you're getting better. There are still some areas you could improve on (such as proportions, and steadier/less wobbly lines) but if you keep pushing yourself like this I'm sure you'll get those down :3 and I'll echo what the others said with Caleb being an interesting character that we get to see more of!!
I think everyone already covered my thoughts on the story, so instead I'll focus on the artwork! Your traditional art looks really good, especially how you did the textures/effects of the smoke. And the spot blacks look really good!! I know you were thinking of adding color but tbh I think it works perfectly fine in b/w, and the b/w even feels like it fits the tone of the comic. Also really good job with the hand-lettering, it's not an easy task to make handwritten text be perfectly legible. also I think it's very funny that you and Dekkard did the Void Hivemind with giving each other's characters eye-adjacent wounds lol
Kudos for an ambitious comic! There are some narrative weak points on the way to the chase scene that others already pointed out, but I can see that the action was the main focus here, and I thought you handled it well. While some art fundamentals could still use more work, you included a lot of interesting panel shots, didn’t shy away from drawing cars, and made the showdown with Serenity feel intense!
I also liked that you showed Serenity prioritizing healing Carver despite the car crash she also experienced and ofc Caleb is just SO straight-to-the-point evil haha. Would like to know more about why, but something about him rarely speaking and just being quick to violence adds to the intensity of having to run into him ever
Traditional comics are so fun to see, and I thought yours was very clean and easy to read! There was just one panel that I couldn’t quite figure out… but it didn’t take away from the storytelling!
On another note, many people in this tournament had to use this round not only to tell an interesting story, but also as an introduction to their characters. While I think you picked a very interesting setting overall, I left the comic feeling like I still didn’t know much about her aside from her job. Caleb also felt easily replaceable within the story.
I understand the challenge of balancing character building with keeping the comic short and manageable, so I hope to see more of her as an individual in the future and get a better sense of her personality!
loving the development here! the lighting from the street lamp was really fun, the sunset set a nice mood, and I love the desaturated tones of the empty house while they were trying to track Caleb down. He seems very intimidating and intense! I wanna know what his deal is 👀 so mysterious...
BUGGY COMICS MAKE ME SO HAPPY!!! I think the traditional medium suits you well! I can't believe what a raw deal serenity got, healing that guy only to get pinned down and threatened for it. I want more Serenity!!!
Man this scar is brutal! It feels particularly painful when combined with her expression on that penultimate page. The car chase is really cool, I love the high action and speed of it. I’m not sure I understand what Serenity and co found in Caleb’s apartment or how it led them to finding him, however. I also get lost a little on page 9, I’m not sure who the driver in the first panel is? I think it’s the only time we see this character, so there’s little to establish which car he’s in. Is he Caleb’s driver, or is he in one of the police cars? It’s a little confusing here.
I’m enjoying Caleb as a villain and I hope we get to see more of him down the line. I want to know more about his motivations and goals! This is a good showing, 17 colored pages for this deadline is insane. Great work, keep going! (thanks for all the Carver cameos!)
Setting this comic AFTER the scar is inflicted on Caleb is an interesting angle! I like the idea behind it a lot, it’s a really creative frame for the story and it makes a lot of sense for Serenity as a healer. I like the massive scene panel on page 3, having it take up almost the entire page adds a lot to the scale of the disaster. I wonder if some of the pacing of the comic could be adjusted to allow Caleb more time on screen. As cool as it is to have a cameo on page 4, for a short comic like this one I’d feel like it might be effective to trim that and the montage on page 5 and instead spend that time and pagecount with Serenity and Caleb, allowing them to have more time on page together.
I like the creativity on display here. Good stuff! (thanks for the August cameo!)
This was really cool, the way you built up the setting was really immersive and interesting, the ending left me wanting to see more! On that note, the ending did feel a bit abrupt, i was expecting at least one more page to get serenity's reaction to that whole situation. But overall it still works this is an enjoyable read. Good stuff!
Thanks for the cameo Dekkard! I liked your comic a lot. Caleb is a badass character and I love that you went straight for a gritty police car chase with magic spells flying all over. I liked the scar as well, it was brutal but she looks cool with the eyepatch haha. One thing though I didn't really understand was what the blue (orb?) thing was, or how they were able to find Caleb so quickly. I think it could have been cool if you spent more time on the investigation part of the story. Nice work!
I think it is cool that you decided to add a bad guy to your roster and bolster the villain economy of Void. I think you could stand from either more line width variation or possibly turn the thick lines into a strength by leaning into a more exaggerated and cartoony (?) style. Serenity received a simple but severe kind of scar and magic users with eye patches do go pretty hard.
Cool entry! Your lineart and spots black are really strong here and your art style is so neat to me.
A few things I would point out:
Your blue sketch lines are still kind of visible.I would suggest putting your pages through a digital art program or a photo editor so you can either up the contrast, erase the blue lines manually, or put a black and white filter over them to make them blend seemlessly.
From page 4 onwards, the background becomes a white void. There is not much going on, nothing that says "this is a medical tent" other than the one bed. This could be solved by detailing the fabric of the tent itself (maybe putting a cross too), or putting more objects in the background: Other beds, tables with medical tools, containers, first aid kits, etc. It'll make the space feel a lot more lived in
Some of these pages have a lot of white, empty space that could be used to experiment with composition (mainly pages 6 and 7). My suggestion would be: unless it's a quiet and drawn out moment,try to find out ways to creatively fill that space. For example, what if instead of all that white space in page 5, you drew a visual representation of serenity's magic, jumping from panel to panel trying to heal each person? What if instead of having Caleb and Serenity surrounded by white space, you had them surrounded by the fabric of the tent itself? Little changes like that.
It's kind of hard to tell what the characters are doing at times. In page 6 I couldn't tell if Caleb was taking out a dagger he already had, or if he was making one out of his own blood. Maybe a different angle or some other visual indicators that "magic is happening" would help
Writing-wise, I kinda wish Caleb had done more. He didn't really feel all that important to the story, and like he could've been replaced with any other evil wizard. Other than that, I feel like the comic does an adequate job at establishing Serenity's situation and the way she views her job; and her attachment to carver, of course.
Cool entry! I really enjoyed the way that you used both Choko and Carver's cameos here. The way that Serenity's very first instinct after regaining consciousness is the heal Carver instead of helping herself really stuck out to me. The scar you gave her looks rad as hell, too :3c
This is a super strong entry, the shorter page count working well in the comic's favor. It feels like it doesn't need to stop and dally anywhere for it to be clear and complete.
I also really enjoy the artwork in general! Your anatomy and traditional inks are super good to look at, and the last panel on page 6 is a real standout to me. Great work!
There's a lot of pages here and each one is either progressing the story or delivering some cool as hell action. I like the angles and set ups you have for your set pieces. This was a cool scar match, and the one given to Serenity is BRUTAL.
The moment he went after Serenity was a nail biter, I wasn't expecting a long battle between these two, but you definitely delivered on Caleb's unhinged mind which most likely was worsened by this scar! Fanastic comic, Buggy!
Comments (20)
You both did well on these, keep up the good work!
Man, I am consistently impressed by your ambition.You don't shy away from hard angles or subjects to draw, and I can see every comic you're getting better. There are still some areas you could improve on (such as proportions, and steadier/less wobbly lines) but if you keep pushing yourself like this I'm sure you'll get those down :3 and I'll echo what the others said with Caleb being an interesting character that we get to see more of!!
I think everyone already covered my thoughts on the story, so instead I'll focus on the artwork! Your traditional art looks really good, especially how you did the textures/effects of the smoke. And the spot blacks look really good!! I know you were thinking of adding color but tbh I think it works perfectly fine in b/w, and the b/w even feels like it fits the tone of the comic. Also really good job with the hand-lettering, it's not an easy task to make handwritten text be perfectly legible. also I think it's very funny that you and Dekkard did the Void Hivemind with giving each other's characters eye-adjacent wounds lol
Kudos for an ambitious comic! There are some narrative weak points on the way to the chase scene that others already pointed out, but I can see that the action was the main focus here, and I thought you handled it well. While some art fundamentals could still use more work, you included a lot of interesting panel shots, didn’t shy away from drawing cars, and made the showdown with Serenity feel intense!
I also liked that you showed Serenity prioritizing healing Carver despite the car crash she also experienced and ofc Caleb is just SO straight-to-the-point evil haha. Would like to know more about why, but something about him rarely speaking and just being quick to violence adds to the intensity of having to run into him ever
Traditional comics are so fun to see, and I thought yours was very clean and easy to read! There was just one panel that I couldn’t quite figure out… but it didn’t take away from the storytelling!
On another note, many people in this tournament had to use this round not only to tell an interesting story, but also as an introduction to their characters. While I think you picked a very interesting setting overall, I left the comic feeling like I still didn’t know much about her aside from her job. Caleb also felt easily replaceable within the story.
I understand the challenge of balancing character building with keeping the comic short and manageable, so I hope to see more of her as an individual in the future and get a better sense of her personality!
loving the development here! the lighting from the street lamp was really fun, the sunset set a nice mood, and I love the desaturated tones of the empty house while they were trying to track Caleb down. He seems very intimidating and intense! I wanna know what his deal is 👀 so mysterious...
BUGGY COMICS MAKE ME SO HAPPY!!! I think the traditional medium suits you well! I can't believe what a raw deal serenity got, healing that guy only to get pinned down and threatened for it. I want more Serenity!!!
Also the orb acted as a type of recording Caleb forgot to erase. (I don't know how orbs work lol)
Page 9 was Caleb's driver that's why Carver used his blood magic on him to stoo the car
Man this scar is brutal! It feels particularly painful when combined with her expression on that penultimate page. The car chase is really cool, I love the high action and speed of it. I’m not sure I understand what Serenity and co found in Caleb’s apartment or how it led them to finding him, however. I also get lost a little on page 9, I’m not sure who the driver in the first panel is? I think it’s the only time we see this character, so there’s little to establish which car he’s in. Is he Caleb’s driver, or is he in one of the police cars? It’s a little confusing here.
I’m enjoying Caleb as a villain and I hope we get to see more of him down the line. I want to know more about his motivations and goals! This is a good showing, 17 colored pages for this deadline is insane. Great work, keep going! (thanks for all the Carver cameos!)
Setting this comic AFTER the scar is inflicted on Caleb is an interesting angle! I like the idea behind it a lot, it’s a really creative frame for the story and it makes a lot of sense for Serenity as a healer. I like the massive scene panel on page 3, having it take up almost the entire page adds a lot to the scale of the disaster. I wonder if some of the pacing of the comic could be adjusted to allow Caleb more time on screen. As cool as it is to have a cameo on page 4, for a short comic like this one I’d feel like it might be effective to trim that and the montage on page 5 and instead spend that time and pagecount with Serenity and Caleb, allowing them to have more time on page together.
I like the creativity on display here. Good stuff! (thanks for the August cameo!)
This was really cool, the way you built up the setting was really immersive and interesting, the ending left me wanting to see more! On that note, the ending did feel a bit abrupt, i was expecting at least one more page to get serenity's reaction to that whole situation. But overall it still works this is an enjoyable read. Good stuff!
Thanks for the cameo Dekkard! I liked your comic a lot. Caleb is a badass character and I love that you went straight for a gritty police car chase with magic spells flying all over. I liked the scar as well, it was brutal but she looks cool with the eyepatch haha. One thing though I didn't really understand was what the blue (orb?) thing was, or how they were able to find Caleb so quickly. I think it could have been cool if you spent more time on the investigation part of the story. Nice work!
I think it is cool that you decided to add a bad guy to your roster and bolster the villain economy of Void. I think you could stand from either more line width variation or possibly turn the thick lines into a strength by leaning into a more exaggerated and cartoony (?) style. Serenity received a simple but severe kind of scar and magic users with eye patches do go pretty hard.
Cool entry! Your lineart and spots black are really strong here and your art style is so neat to me.
A few things I would point out:
Writing-wise, I kinda wish Caleb had done more. He didn't really feel all that important to the story, and like he could've been replaced with any other evil wizard. Other than that, I feel like the comic does an adequate job at establishing Serenity's situation and the way she views her job; and her attachment to carver, of course.
Cool entry! I really enjoyed the way that you used both Choko and Carver's cameos here. The way that Serenity's very first instinct after regaining consciousness is the heal Carver instead of helping herself really stuck out to me. The scar you gave her looks rad as hell, too :3c
This is a super strong entry, the shorter page count working well in the comic's favor. It feels like it doesn't need to stop and dally anywhere for it to be clear and complete.
I also really enjoy the artwork in general! Your anatomy and traditional inks are super good to look at, and the last panel on page 6 is a real standout to me. Great work!
There's a lot of pages here and each one is either progressing the story or delivering some cool as hell action. I like the angles and set ups you have for your set pieces. This was a cool scar match, and the one given to Serenity is BRUTAL.
The moment he went after Serenity was a nail biter, I wasn't expecting a long battle between these two, but you definitely delivered on Caleb's unhinged mind which most likely was worsened by this scar! Fanastic comic, Buggy!
OH SHIT THIS IS GONNA BE INTENSE!