Cute story on both sides! It's fascinating how your arcs are so similar it makes me wonder if you talked about it lol.
Rikun - nice to see you back and Itami in action. Hopefully we get a more finished look from your comics too at some point. I like your solid lineart as well but I think variations in line thickness will make it more pop even when you don't get time to color it.
Cab - IDK man, you're such a force in comic making. How do you do it? The quality is very nice and consistent all throughout. I love that motion effect in the last page too. It looks sketchy/rough but it drives the point home. I could feel the movement in that scene! The only crit I can give really is just a bit of face variations esp in your female characters. I feel that Roxy, Miranda and Veruca look very similar sometimes in facial features. But that's just me nitpicking really. Excellent job!
Cab: Page 3 was fantastic, I would love to see you do moments like those more as they help give your stories a whole new level as the silence has so much more of an oomf with all your normal dialogue. I also like the rough ones you did for the final page. Great job getting is much done in one week.
Rikun: It's great you were able to do another comic. The story was a cute and simple one. The lineart is solid and your gestures are also really good, the one thing I would say is to work on your expressions, mainly adding a couple more details to the faces since they feel a bit flat. One example is how the eyes were a bit inconsistent in this, sometimes they were just a circle while on panels like the final on they are a bit more realistic, the constant flipping between the different styles of eyes wasn't great. Beyond that I think you should ad a little more to the faces like a hint of the eye lids or a bit more lip. All that is stuff worth experimenting and trying in future comics. Look forward to seeing more stuff.
I don't have much more to add than anyone else has already said, but I enjoyed both comics.
Cab- I like how adventurous you are with the backgrounds and poses, and your inks are always lovely.
Rikun- I also enjoy your inks! I like the dynamic you gave between Miranda and Itami.
Nice work, both of you!
I can tell you were both having fun with this and sharing notes. There's a nice synergy between these two, and you seem comfortable depicting each other's characters.
Cab: You got awfully close to this comic not really being about Itami with that setup, and with Itami suddenly expositing for a few panels. It still paid off. You did give them a fun chemistry by the end of it. Maybe they can be friends.
Characters' head-body ratios and overall proportions are a bit inconsistent, and while it works for lighthearted scenes, sometimes it's a little disorienting.
Thanks for the Ben cameo! Wow, for a casting guy he's getting REALLY into it. Maybe he always wanted to act...
Rikun: Good to see you making comics again! Wacky entertainment world comedy hijinks suit Itami well. There are panels I can tell you had a lot of fun drawing, and working out that visual humor (... which, coincidentally, have to do with Miranda winding up on the floor). The spoiled golf cart getaway is a funny gag, but it didn't read clearly to me at first. I wonder if that's the fault of your staging or rendering. Don't hesitate to take advantage of streamlining tools like CSP's panel tools, rulers, shape tools, masks, etc, too, to help your comic look cleaner while not taking time away from working on the drawings.
Cab - I really love your inking and I think your black and white comics consistently come out really strong.
I'm so happy to see Itami back in action! Overall, this is a pretty good comic. The story is simple and straightforward. What I would love to see more from your B&W comics would be more spot blacks. I enjoy your ink work and I think balancing out your white space with some well placed blacks would really give your work an extra punch.
oh man that was an unexpected good read :D
cab! I must say i love this comic of yours. I think you are going into a storytelling direction with this that is really adding to your artstyle. At least I like this lightheartedness with a little bittersweet moments.
Rikun! Its so good to see you battling again. The setup was super interesting here with the monkey being announced (i was looking forward to some wierd audition battle) while i felt a little disappointed when it was immediately turned into a chase/martial conflict. The conclusion was pretty cool with the car not getting any traction and Itamis smugness and clear determination. All in all it was a funny read but i think there is potential to be explored.
technically please try to get more consistent throughout your pages. Its clear you are way more confident with character/pose depictions in comparission to effects like the squeeking wheel.
But hell 1 Week is though. it was a fun read so thats cool with me.
Cab I like this a lot! The 'Chinatown' caption got cut off on page one but.. there's no doubt they're in chinatown! Miranda's emotions bubbling up during the interview was paced well and made me feel for her for the first time. I thought near the end that Itami wasn't going to get a chance to shine but then she gets to completely go to town on Miranda. The looseness of these panels really make the action stand out and feel violent... good stuff.
Rikun this was funny. The assistant asking her boss about a giant monkey, the little movie studio get-away buggy, and the violence at the end. I assume the cart didn't move because Bell was too heavy in the back, but this could have been represented better--when i first saw it I thought he had grabbed and stopped it from hitting Itami. Just a little thing. It's weird that her monkey henchmen didn't try to help at all but that's still pretty funny too.
Cab - The fight on page 7 was very good - the poses were full of motion, and I like this sketchy grey toned look. Being a little rough around the edges really adds to the fight imo. I think these are the most lively panels I’ve seen from you so far.
I know you asked for no crit but... was that “they no pay for food” really necessary? The way you drew Wong too just came across as distasteful to me. Seeing as Itami looks fine, you clearly have the ability to draw East Asian people in a way that isn’t somewhat stereotypical...
Rikun - Hah, I feel you captured the goofy tone Miranda brings really well. The comedic timing on page 5 was great, I snorted, and I like the cheery end to the comic as if the whole debacle was part of the ad. Overall this was just a fun little comic.
I can’t think of much crit tbh. The story is pretty simple and not very creative, but I’m honestly not sure what advice I can give on that front. I did notice a lot of empty backgrounds though, and a lack of motion lines in the very first panel, which makes Itami look like she’s just hanging in the air mid-kick rather than moving.
Sir, it was an honor doing this comic with you, I love it, your miranda comic was as smooth as any rice wine, I can't wait to see future comics from you again, Rikun.
Welcome back to Void, Rikun.
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