ABI: Awesome story! Loved reading this! The high-quality render must have been a mission to pull off, so well done! I think some drawing form life would help you figure out some trickier anatomy conundrums and poses from above etc in future comics, which is a tiny nitpick in a sea of great work. :)
Kent: Nice to see your traditional work! I think this same story could have been told in fewer panels and remained tight and interesting, giving you some more time to polish. There are some laugh-out-loud moments and I always enjoy your flavourful style greeting my retinas! My only quibble is Kurts vernaular which has suddenly transformed under your management, it didn't feel wholly true to Radjis take on the character so maybe watch out for that in further comics.
Super amazing stuff for only two weeks *v* wow to both of you!
ABI: Sometimes the simplest stories are the best. This is one of those moments. A nice little tale about getting smashed by a really good drink. Kurt having to look up French phrases out of a book to sound fake-deep was great. Devoting a whole page to describing what went into the drink felt a bit dragged, admittedly, and prolly could have been condensed.
I really like your lines and colors but mirroring other critiques, your lighting and shading all has this oppressively soft look to it, which makes every surface look like it's made out of plastic.
Kent: I feel like you have the good makings of a multi-part story here but by itself it feels like it needs other parts to hold it up, like watching the first part of a movie instead of the first episode of a show. That said I did rather enjoy what you gave us, with envy and idolizing really reflecting in Kurt's dialogue and establishing a good rivalry dynamic for the hearts and minds of the dock residents.
Your lines are really good and expressive, but the lack of any shading along with your dense composition makes every panel super claustrophobic.
Bad idea: I really like Itami as a martial arts bartender! I'd like to see more of this concept. The art and colors are lovely, though I'm spotting some flattened perspective at times, and where is her crotch on page 6?
Mister Kent: Some grey couldn't hurt, but your inks and spot blacks are strong enough to carry it. I'm intrigued by this career change, but the comic really relies on a future entry to show where it's going. I'm intrigued, but not satisfied enough in the process.
ABI- I love your take on the characters! Kurt looks great, theres a mechanical texture to him that came out really well, and i love the flirty style of Itami's dress! the story is a bit simple but i love the fluidity of Itami's movements and the colours are vibrant and gorgeous, sometimes they come out almost TOO shiny to the point of a bit plastic-y but i think you toned that down this comic and had the characters and background have the same amount of lighting.
Kent: You can really fill a scene when you want to! I love your rendering of the city, the characters look like they belong there. I adore how you draw the characters, your Kurt is like hilariously adorable and i love it, and itami totally exudes the aura of a starlet, and Dot wiggling her ears on page 5 is basically the best. I love that you utilized the plot from valentines day where Kurt and Jowee are fans of itami's movies (somebody's gotta be? lol). I wish this had some more shading or something- more spotblacks or grayscales or tertiary colour spots but thats a bit of a nitpick because honestly i really like this.
@ABI wow, okay so this is lovely. really really pretty. I enjoyed the plot and I kinda liked that there was some personal satisfaction for both at the end. I think you made kurt more french-french than creole, but the comic was strong enough that i wasn't too upset.
@Mister Kent
YOUR LINES ARE INCREDIBLE. I also enjoy the little feud that's going on here, the bitterness. I do think the yellow-ish speech bubbles were kinda... odd? the color did help lead the eye, but the fact that it was the only color on the page was a little weird for me.
@ABI as Itami
Ayy! Gladja got her after all! Overall, I'm definitely a fan of this new direction, but I wonder how long you can keep drink-combos interesting.
The Goods: Obviously you've got the effects up to 11 on this one. Having the highest level of polish possible on this seemed to be your main focus art-wise, and it definitely shows. And for writing, I'm glad to see you pull back from Itami The Street Fighter to Itami The Boozer. Plus, you made the relatively-mundane craft of drink-mixing into some dynamic anime happenings. So good on ya there.
The Crits: So while the polish and SickFX were the bread and butter of the comic, it sorta seemed like you were counting on that to carry the artwork. Like, page 1. Liquids inside the glass with the light shining through? Amazing. The glass and bottle itself? Kinda wonky and lopsided. Page 2. Cool glow effects and city lights? Check. Simple box vending machines and airbrushed-in bar patrons? Not great. This works fine during the mixing sequences when there's little outside the action to focus on, but then on the last page, the scenery turns back into beautifully-painted cardboard. It's always best when you've got strong bones and structure in a scene, making sure you can stop at any point and it looks strong enough to stand on it's own.
@MrKent as Kurt
I always love seein your comics! I think I say that every time, but it doesn't stop bein true.
The Good: Man, I always respect how strong and simple each page is done. You've got a real eye for composition and readability, so my eyes always know exactly where to go and how long to stay there. Across the comic, whether its the characters or the setting, things always have just the right amount of detail and I can always dig that. A general AWWW YEAAHH all around.
The Crit: My only real crit is with the writing. It's not bad or anything. In fact it's a very organic setup and very evenly paced. The issue comes with just that. It's all setup. I'm sure you've got something awesome planned for Round 2, but I worry that this doesnt have enough Oomph or Wow factor to carry it there. Some sorta setpiece moment would really elevate this a whole dang bunch.
ABI: Really, really digged the ambience of this comic. Nice work with the lightning of the scenes and the general bar atmosphere. Story wise I really digged it, It wasn't anything super involved but as a self contained first fight of the tournament it worked well. I want more of Itami the Kungfu Bartender.
Mister Kent: I really enjoyed the dialogue of this. Its nice to see the way it spirals out of Kurts control lol. I agree with everyone about the nice grasp of lineart in this. I really wish I could draw as stable and varied lines.
ABI: Maaaaan, this is such a unique comic with a unique conflict! And it looks so nice, just all over!!! The shading and posing and everything!!!!!
Kent: oh no, is itami... committing GENTRIFICATION? ON KURT'S TERRITORY??? I really wish I could see more of this power struggle! But, this only really works as an introduction, and I'm not sure we'll ever get to see the plot develop. :(
I'm glad to see how my girl turned out in both of these stories!
ABI: I'm happy to see how much fun you're having with Itami. Like everyone else has said, combining martial arts and bartending was an awesome choice and I love the amount of thought and detail you put into it. Many people already pointed out that your lighting can be all over the place, but I commend you for being able to crank out so much in 2 weeks. I noticed the backgrounds seemed to have a lot of unnaturally straight angles, but I'm guessing that was a time saving technique. Best of luck should you advance!
Kent: Continuity from Valentine's was a nice touch, and many have already mentioned your strong control of line thickness from foreground to background. I get that you probably ran out of time for color, but I feel like even a touch of a shadow here or there would've helped push the third dimension your comic needed. I like how this dynamic is developing, and I'm excited to figure out how this will work in continuity or what kind of plans you may have.
ABI: I always felt you had a soft spot for this character ever since the Vs Kuno battle so it's cool to see you rocking her out once more! Story wise this was a great fun comic, even though the structure is extremely Japanese/anime/manga I ain't mad. I feel like your lighting style makes too many things too glossy though especially the hair which ends up looking a bit too much like plastic lego wigs sometimes. I would experiment more with that, some sharper thinner streaks to get those individual hair reflections that really help sell hair.
Kent: I don't know why it's only now that I'm learning that Kurt is cajun, all the time i thought he was like French from France! This was an enjoyable comic overall and the lines are good enough, but I would have loved to see it all colored~
ABI- Holy guacamole I had to re-check the deadline timer. This was trotted out with two weeks draw time? golf clap to you, good sir. Golf clap. The colors on this is really fully realized. Granted, you still seem to have leanings on making everything borderline reflective and shiny, but even so this is an impressive amount of work and detail in so short a time. Your take on Kurt is unique and creative, and I especially dug how you incorporated Itami's fighting know how in nothing more than her gesticulations while making a drink. The heavenly shaft of light over the first sip was just the comedic icing on the cake for me. Nice work.
MISTER KENT- You got me rethinking how I make my own bayou boy's dialogue look. This had the perfect marriage of getting the point across and readability. I doff my hat to thee...but only to fill it with good pointers n' stuff XD As to your comic overall, I know stark inks are your thing, AND you're on a tournament time crunch, but I wish there'd been some shadows to break up the characters from the environments. You got some great angles and set ups panel t panel, but they feel so flat. That said, its cool it seems you enjoyed exploring Kurt's old docks and gave it your own Kenty twist.
my son is so amazing in both those comics !!
The main difference in the way you both handled him is the language, something I personally struggled with: Kent straight up gave him a "visual" on his Cajun accent, while Bad made him says quotes, which gives him a hilarious "I've seen all kind of shit" vibe! Props to Bad on this one
Bad used the bar concept well, and the idea of giving Kurt a drink so fab it kicks him out of his funk i loved
Kent integrated Itami in a way that respects the continuity of Itami and Kurt's previous interactions and the event of the flood and Armaggedon, and the love the docks have for Itami's movies. Props to Kent
You did both so good I'm crying manly french tears
(even if kent don't win, i'm keeping that Itamimania in the docks, it's too funny)
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