I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who read, commented, and/or voted on these comics. It's been an extremely fun experience and can't wait to show you what else I have planned for Harvey.
Thank you to my opponent, JK-Antwon. You had a fun comic and your character was a joy to work with! I hope to see more comics from you on here soon!
Sean good job bro tou did a bangup good job lots of work was put into it and it shows.
Antwon: i didnt think this was very well writen. One page and it was a tad confusing. I dont understand why the hair.. exploded? Whaaa. Sorry man.
@Astro Sean - Honestly I am with Maxie here, I wasn't expecting this kind of story but you managed to pull it off well! I am intrigued about what happens next!
@JK-Antwon - I AM a sucker for old toons and man, a character based around silent comics? That is such a challenge but such a cool gimmick! I wanna try battling you someday! Also I think I have read your webcomic before! Dude, so great to have you in Void!
@Astro Sean; I love that you have the makings of a larger overarching story with this! I really wasn't expecting a gritty noir style comic from you but I'm pleasantly surprised. I do wish I had seen a little bit more of your opponent.
@JK-Antwon; You really have a nice feel going on in your comic it feels very Saturday morning comic. For toons your characters do feel a bit stiff and I would have loved to see more expressiveness of the characters.
@Astro Sean: Man, I love your writing! This comic was so short and simple, but every bit felt like a perfect fit in a well-paced, well-narrated story. Your coloring looks a bit messy, and there are a few places where your thick lines kind of cramped the panel, so watch out for that and see if you can make it a little cleaner and clearer next time!
@JK-Antwon: I love how well you captured the spirit of silent toons in your comic! I wish there were a little more to it, but what's there is hard to find anything bad about! I most definitely want to see a lot more from you, so even if you lose this match, I hope you get right back up and challenge someone to a regular comic match! Your stuff is awesome!
ASTRO SEAN- Who knew toons were such sticklers for their hairstyles? Always happy to see you drawin'. I don't think I've met a character of yours I didn't like or was heavily intrigued by and Harvey is no exception. Seeing as this is round one, I'm glad to see something of a trend in some comics with setting the stage for an epic tale. You came into this with what seems to be an idea and it shows. I much prefer the polish and tweaks you've made to Harvey's design. the sharp nose definitely gives him some character when he emotes during his little inner monologue. As ever, being highly covetous of your opponent, I'm surprised you didn't utilize him in a more...well toony manner. I'm all for seriousness, but I feel your excitement to tell your type of story kind of left Sidney by the wayside- literally.
JK-ANTWON- While you only have one page, its clear you used your week to make that one page look super good. Seeing as I'm familiar with your work, I'm glad to see that quality and gloss still prevalent, not to mention ol' Harvey looks adorable all toonified. I have to say, while I enjoy a clean looking comic, this almost looks too clean. You have a real handle on using rulers in your work. Try going without. Some freehand lines would really loosen your style up and perhaps add some personality to your other wise rigid backgrounds.
As for your story...I'm not sure I get it. Sidney didn't hit Harvey with the mallet (or just missed), but he still exploded?
@JK: I agree with ROFLQU. You have real good polish with your work, but the characters look stiff compared to their animated origins. Their expressions are very subdued. I would encourage you to push that. Get these characters movin'!
@AstroSean: Wow, I really wasn't expecting the gritty noir feel coming from a comic between an exploding stylist and a cartoon squirrel! I think the only thing I didn't quite understand was Sidney's role in the comic. He hired the guys who kidnapped Harvey but... was thrown out of the van? Maybe could've used one more box of text explaining it, though I can understand not wanting to muddle the noir feel with over-explaining things.
@JK:Your lines are super clean! It works really well with your toon characters and toon-harvey looked great! I will just say, it doesn't look like Sidney actually hit Harvey with the hammer in the last two panels? It looks like the hammer landed next to his foot so it doesn't read clearly as to what happened.
Sean: Super great work. Really different change of direction for you and a great dark mood piece overall. I think the simple greys worked out in your favor here and it definitely helped make the piece shine throughout.
You managed to make a tight piece within these 3 pages and your recent work in the LSDT makes it clear that you're getting comfortable telling a short story within the medium. I know you were super busy this week practicing with your band, so it's good to know that you can ultimately fallback on your skill in condensing your story.
I think my larger complaint is really that you could have utilized some more details inside of the car instead of the flat blacks, but besides that, I think you handled Harvey really well and I really love that shot at the end. You've made some serious strides these last few years and this one really helps show it.
I'm anxiously awaiting whatever you end up doing with Harvey, because this all looks great.
JK-Antwon: Hey, welcome to the site. I like your character. I'm a fan of classic cartoons myself, so I can definitely relate. Also I looked at your webcomic. You've got a pretty wide cast and a pretty fun grouping overall. I'm only going to talk about this comic, since that's what we do on here.
So, you've got the basic design for a classic toon down solid with Sidney. He's definitely in line with a classic toon character. However, I think you could push your toon direction further and make your characters more alive, more animated as well. For me, I think your characters are a little too static? Overall, this can be attributed to them lacking a line of action. If you could get some more buoyancy and bounce within your movements and characters, you'd be all the better for it.
(If you're not sure what I'm talking about, this is an example of what I'm referring to. https://courses.cs.washington.edu/courses/cse459/14au/assignments/assignment_3/images/tom_and_jerry_loa.jpg )
I'm also a little curious about what you draw with and what your process is. All in all, you've got a lot of experience under your belt, as is clearly visible with your webcomic. I definitely think you can push yourself more and do even better things with both the medium and your ability to make lively animated characters. Keep on drawing, great job!
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