[quote]That seems like an insane workflow for an app that is doing you no favors. And I thought it was designed for working straight to digital, not editing scans. If the images are scanned, don't you have ANY editing software on the machine you scan with? Or, if you're hellbent on HAVING to use a tablet, maybe look for one that let's you run proper software. Kicking it to jpeg is already adding compression that's fuckin' with the final quality of your image. That's probably why curves ends eating away at everything.
Yeah, it really is, and I do have GIMP on my computer, but I haven't used it yet. So for this deadline, I just stuck with what I knew. I'm definitely not intent on using the tablet, so cutting that out of the process will be great. I'm looking to get Manga Studio when I've got a little extra money, but in the meantime I'll start watching some GIMP tutorials on youtube.
[quote]What I did here was I scanned the page at 300 dpi grayscale (for some reason the scanner won't scan black and white, it says .jpegs can't display that way or some nonsense. Then I upload the images to Imgur. Then I go to my iPad and save the picture from Imgur to my photos. Then I open Procreate and import the image to my canvas there. Then I mess with the curves to get the blacks black and the whites white. I think I went too far on these pages and made the lines jaggy, I'll try to find that sweet spot better next time. Anyway, then I upload THAT image to Imgur, where I resize it from 1024 x 1582 down to 777 x 1200.
That seems like an insane workflow for an app that is doing you no favors. And I thought it was designed for working straight to digital, not editing scans. If the images are scanned, don't you have ANY editing software on the machine you scan with? Or, if you're hellbent on HAVING to use a tablet, maybe look for one that let's you run proper software. Kicking it to jpeg is already adding compression that's fuckin' with the final quality of your image. That's probably why curves ends eating away at everything.
Fern: Yes I did. Energy threw the challenge at me, and I accepted it without discussion. Trial by fire, baby! But I got burned this time. No worries.
The first page actually wasn't a cover image, but it wasn't intended to be the first page. It's actually supposed to be the second to last page, so probably page 6. But it was the first page I drew. So at the last second, I put it at the beginning, because I couldn't very well jump from page 2 to that, it would make even less sense. I almost didn't include it at all, but then my character wouldn't be in the comic, and it'd be a default. So I thought, I dunno, it's like a creepy flash-forward of things to come, and then we go back to the opening. So if that didn't read at all, that's why.
My concept was this (and this might show up as a BB at some point, because I do like the premise): Jessie driving down the freeway dealing with having had her wallet stolen by Holden Shark.
Commissioner radios and tells her she's needed at the precinct, they've just picked up a witness in the recent murder of Alonso Pena (the fat guy who dies in The Smile's intro. I know, it's not exactly spelled out, that's my bad, I'm working on my delivery of exposition).
Jessie arrives at the precinct, where the commissioner fills her in on how they got their hands on this guy, that he somehow survived the attack on Alonso's villa.
Jessie goes into the interrogation room to talk to the man, and there's a page of him explaining what the hell's going on (this page didn't get finished, so there's a big chunk of information missing you guys probably coulda used).
Something happens that causes Jessie to leave the room to investigate (I hadn't figured out what this would be, probably a gunshot).
While outside the room, the lights go out, and the backup generator kicks on, hence the darkness and red lighting in that first (second to last) page.
The next and final page would be Jessie groggily waking up restrained, and having to watch helplessly as The Smile kills the witness, as per his mission. I then wanted The Smile to get uncomfortably close to Jessie and, in an eerie twist, return her wallet to her, before slipping away.
So there's the whole story idea I had for this comic, but several things got in my way of seeing it to completion within a week. 1) The writing. Plot, dialogue, writing just doesn't come naturally to me, and all my good ideas simply came too late. 2) I probably should have used a cleaner, quicker style. 3) Goddamn perspective. It's my bane. 4) The text. I tried using Photoshop Touch to do the lettering, and it absolutely sucks. The font sucks, and the way you have to input the text sucks. Next time I get paid, I think I'll shell out for Manga Studio. And 5) I had no idea what I could do with a week. I went for this whole mini-narrative without any experience with the workflow or process, and struggling with technology. But now I know.
Kuro: What I did here was I scanned the page at 300 dpi grayscale (for some reason the scanner won't scan black and white, it says .jpegs can't display that way or some nonsense. Then I upload the images to Imgur. Then I go to my iPad and save the picture from Imgur to my photos. Then I open Procreate and import the image to my canvas there. Then I mess with the curves to get the blacks black and the whites white. I think I went too far on these pages and made the lines jaggy, I'll try to find that sweet spot better next time. Anyway, then I upload THAT image to Imgur, where I resize it from 1024 x 1582 down to 777 x 1200.
The blown out face on the commissioner in the last panel is because I didn't like her face as I'd drawn it on the board, so after I scanned it and put it in Procreate, I cut and pasted the head I'd drawn on her in a previous digital version of the page, which I scrapped because I knew I could work faster traditionally. But that page was much smaller, so I had to enlarge the head, and that made it fuzzy. I shoulda just redrawn it. I'm glad you guys all caught that, because now I know I can't be lazy and try to slip bandaids past you lol.
Finally, the word balloons. On these pages, I included the balloons in my layouts, and drew them on the boards. Then I added the text digitally (and poorly). This being my second comic, I had no idea how big the text needed to be in relation to the page so it would be readable when reduced. This is still very much a learning process for me. I look at professional comics and see how absolutely tiny their word balloons are, and I'm trying to hone in on that, but it'll probably take me a few comics of trial and error to find that golden ratio.
Thanks so much for the crits, guys, sorry for the novel. I can't wait to show you the next comic!
Don't know why this needed to be a week since both sides seem unfinished. Give yourself room to work & plot things out better, you guys.
Energy- I see that you're looking to battle weekly & that's great ambition but you should really be working on applying fundamentals. It'd be one thing if you applied them to the comics you do but I'm not sure I'm seeing it happen. Like anatomy. Everyone in your comic has the same body shape & it's a weird one at that, where things bend the way they aren't supposed to. They also don't seem weighted to the ground properly, as the way they're posed in some of the panels, they look ready to topple over, or like they're levitating. I think you really ought to work from life & keep working on it, focusing on structure, variation, & weight. You also should think about moving your camera around some more. It's a lot of similar angles & it's boring.
Dino- Pay attention to your line weights. There's not a ton of variance happening & my eyes get bogged down trying to parse some of the detail stuff. It's weird too because it looks like you're scanning bitmaps without anti-aliasing but then that weird 'resized' head is nothing but anti-aliasing in the same panel with weirdly bitmapped lines that seem too faint to read in spots like the letters on the door or jagged & clunky on the hatching by her jacket. Again, you're undercutting your art skill with this kind of stuff.
And your type's too small for the font you're trying to use. I'd recommend some other typeface entirely though because that one's looking goofy & doesn't read clearly. Also, maybe figure out a better way to optimize your balloon real estate. A lot of negative space happening with these wide balloons, when you could really stack the words tighter in more rows & cut down on the amount of area you're taking to cover the art.
SO. DINO.
looks like you bitten off a bit more than what you can chew.
First page is great, the atmosphere and art. I am fearing this was just meant to be the cover image though. The rest is a bit whaaaa? i guess you didn;t finish so can't tell what's actually going on. But what bothers me most is your choice of font - it looks like idk BRUSH SCRIPT. It's like bad fake handwriting, I would suggest with going with something much plainer and more legible.
Skulls: Thanks for the crits, and good catch on the 180 flip. It just occurred to me, that panel was mirrored in the roughs. I flipped it so the hallway led in the direction of the next panel, and I forgot to draw the figures back in their correct positions. D'oh!
And you're right, the Commissioner in the last panel had a wonky face, so I pasted over it digitally, and it didn't resize well. You can chalk that one up to good old fashioned laziness on my part.
As for the narrative, it's good to know it's confusing, I wasn't sure it would come across or not. Basically, since Jessie is (so far as I can gather) a special forces cop turned vigilante. So I figured she'd have a Batman-like relationship with the police commissioner, and I'd connect her to my character by having her investigate the murder perpetrated in The Smile's intro comic. Unfortunately, I think my lack of exposition in my intro kind of bit me in the ass here, because the only way you'd figure any of this out is by reading my intro, and drawing the connection (I didn't include any narration in my intro to explain what was happening, the one guy is simply referred to as Alonso).
So thanks for the honesty, and you can be sure I'm making it a point to avoid being so vague next time. I've actually been reading old comics from the 70s and 80s and how they went out of their way to explain every damn thing that's happening, even when you can see it, and kind of taking some cues from that to help make my storytelling more clear.
Dino: I'll be honest and say since it's not finished, I couldn't enjoy it in terms of story. It's just hard to follow for me even on what it was building up to. I will say however, that I enjoyed the artwork. If I had to critique you there, there's jsut small things: 1. You break the 180 rule in a sense where on page 3, Jval is on the right, then suddenly on the left after panel 2. You could say that during the time it took to turn that corner, they switched places, but it's better to always be aware of where your characters are and draw them accordingly. 2. you made an edit on page 3 last panel, where one of your characters are blurry. Either you used a different brush to draw her in, or you resized her, it's a bit distracting from the rest of your page that uses sharper lines. Just be careful next time. other than that, hope to see the rest as a BB!
Energy: Again, gonna focus on the art since I had a hard time telling where this was going. You have a lot of panels with just head shots, which gets repetitive and confusing throughout. I would suggest researching more on different shots rather than a close up all the time in order to clarify exactly what's going on. Poses continue to be your biggest challenge as far as I've seen. Your characters are very stiff, barely do their limbs bend, and they always seem to try to do every thing while standing. I would advise you to study up on human anatomy and how it's shaped, along with the S and C curve. I hope to see this finished some time despite what I said, look forward to a conclusion
Thanks for the critique, Shen! (I've been listening to your charming drawl on the VOIDcast the last couple days, I just discovered that part of the site and I'm loving it)
A cool-looking let-down, couldn't have said it better myself! You're absolutely right, I bit off more than I could chew on this first battle. With only 1 week to bring this thing from "opponent research" to "writing" to "done", I got a bit too ambitious. So while this one will likely show up finished as a Beyond Battle sometime down the road, I've determined that my battles for the foreseeable future will focus more on depicting ONE good scene, rather than an entire mini-narrative. I just haven't got the workflow down yet. I have no shorthand, no tricks, no time-savers. So every step in this process was a learning experience for me, and that was good.
Dino, great first showing! that first page looks AWESOME, I cant believe it! what a spooky scene! Afterwards theres a good setup, I like that you tied in jessie's last battle but then theres no payoff? so its a very cool-looking let down sort of, heh. your own character is barely in it, I dont know very much about him at all. But its your first battle so you get a grace period for figuring how much story you can tell in such a short time an its is GREAT looking, I love your inks and that second page is very dynamic! Looking forward to what you do next!
NRG this was better than your last battle cuz i can see that theres a story but the story is a bit difficult to make out, I think some more text might have helped explain what was going on a little better? but this time the action and setting were easier to follow so thats a plus
Hey thanks, and don't stress it! I feel like your hand is very free when you're drawing and inking, which is an excellent skill to have- it keeps motion in your lines, all the way through to completion, and I can clearly see it! I'm anticipating our future battle- as I am determined to make it so!
And you're very welcome! :D
Dude, Ink, thanks for the crits and the compliments. I'm a fan of your work, so it means a lot. I hear ya loud and clear on the rendering, I'm making it a point to rein that in. I tend to overdo folds in clothing, and that's where it gets the muddiest when I start laying on the thick marks. I'm also experimenting with different tools to try and get more control of those big ugly strokes.
DAT FIRST PAGE, THO, Dino! *fans self*
In all seriousness, these pages are gorgeous! I'm a rather big fan of the noir style, and your stuff definitely fits the bill! The first page is so dynamic, both in design and character- you really get the feeling across of dread, as well as Jessie's determination- but it's hard not to find The Smile to be both exhilerating and terrifying. The only negatives I have to comment on, are to watch the amount of sketchiness applied. I really loved some of these "marker" style ink lines, but they become a little messy in some areas which make the image hard to interpret until really studying it- it's part of a stylistic choice, however with some editing, you can certainly maintain the style while still producing a clearer image. Really wish we could have seen more, but I TOTALLY understand the strain and responsibilities which demand attention- Nevertheless, it's excellent to see that you really care about what you're doing.
Energy, I would have loved to see some more finished stuff here! I see there was a really issue with getting these battles out but eh, it happens! I like your layouts in that you're not afraid to make larger images part of the panel, as well as get those action poses out. There are some obvious notes of anatomy that will come with time and practice, however I can see the dedication is there and you're doing great! The only serious thing I have to note is that I would pay attention to character representation- I recall part of The Smile's introduction being that he doesn't speak often...if ever. I would definitely pay attention to these details when portraying someone else's character. Other than that, keep at it and show us some finished stuff!
Wow I wrote novels, yay.
Welp, time's up.
This week's been hectic with work and doctor's appointments, and a commission deadline I'd all but forgotten about. So I only got about half as much done as I had planned. I'll absolutely be finishing this as either a Beyond Battle or a second round with Energy, if he's up for it. Because I'm having a lot of fun with Miss Valley, I think she's a perfect fit for my character's tone.
I had three panels finished on a fourth page for this, but I wasn't able to scan, clean up, and resize it before the deadline. So that page will turn up in the next one.
Energy, hit me up if you're game for round 2, I have to get this whole thing out, I got plans, man!
Dino Nebitt:
I'd noticed there are several artists in the New Characters lineup who never did anything after getting their character approved. I don't want to be one of those!
I've already started a hitlist.
I'd noticed there are several artists in the New Characters lineup who never did anything after getting their character approved. I don't want to be one of those!
I've already started a hitlist.
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