Kura - Great story and characterization as usual. I like your clean line art, but hope to see a little more depth in shading next time. Some parts have very loose sketchiness, which contrasts sharply to the more detailed panels. The best panel IMO is panel 1 on Page 4, but the panel below looks sketchy in contrast (especially that guard). You have some really tight character design working, and sometimes the looser elements seem to throw off the balance. Still, all in all a great read--I love Bullet Princess' entire world and hope to battle her someday!
Video - Love the color work, and the great concept of chef battles you continue to develop. Nice to see Jane and Jesse attend May's matches! Some of the action was a bit muddled (around the GO panel on Page 2, for example) But this was an awesome comic, and I can't wait to see more May Wu adventures soon!
kura, I agree with puzzle about bringing the dramatic shading in the one panel to the whole thing! cause dat white space. but overall it's pretty sharp and clean as usual, I like that you're playing with interesting face shapes on some of the other characters.
video, not bad! I like the way you did the flames, though it really sticks out as being different than the characters. I'd suggest finding a way to blend your elements together so the whole thing looks more unified. smoothing out your ink lines would be a step in the right direction I think!
Puzzle - I should say, this wasn't really a one week battle. Majikura challenged me to a 2 week battle a few weeks ago. 1 week in we had to cancel it do busy schedule issues. So this is technically a 2 week battle. And yeah i'm totally doing post line correcting in photoshop. my scanner is all janky and makes all my ink work look blotchy. I didn't realize it was obvious. I'll work on that. thanks.
Galvo - Cool, i was worried the Chef Battle would come off as weird and incoherent. I'm still looking for a way make everything clear. But i'm glad you enjoyed it. :D
Majikura- Your line work is always super clean and really to to see May in your style. I'm jealous you were able to do a complete story in so few pages. Also, May as an assassin tickles my brain. I hope my portrayal of Triggerina was ok. Her not being in VOID really had me struggling story wise. I hope just making her an adversary wasn't too simplistic. Anyways, great job as usual!
maji: lookin stellar-- very clean- love that panel where she shoots the dude point blank, nicely done. really enjoyed the world you've created here.
video0320: really dug the simple colors on this- well executed. what i wouldn't give for a iron chef like this, hunting your own deer, boar, fish etc - thatd be fantastic. well played. i dont know who the judges were, but the dude in the red shirt totally reminded me of reginald veljohnson (carl winslow) so that got a hearty chuckle from me.
Majikura -
I really liked that dramatically shadowed panel on page 4. I think you could totes bring that that style to the whole comic, it'd really help break up your space. You don't really use alot of texture or fine details, and you don't use tones or anything, so you could really use something to break up all that white space. I think it makes you more conscious of form too, that was one of your stronger illustrations.
Alot of your backgrounds start to get really faint and sketchy as the comic goes, but I think that was just the deadline coming up on you. Some of the stuff you were doing with it early on where nice though. I liked the ground level shot of the camp as the first messenger comes up.
Video320 -
There's something weirdly off about your line art. It's sort of wobbly and variable in thickness at strange times. You're not using any post-line correction are you, cause that stuff always looks weird. I'm not really even sure if that's what it is though. If it's just you have difficulty maintaining consistent pressure, just keep practicing moving your hand quickly and with confidence. I think besides the weird wobbliness sometimes, your line-art is way better dude. You're getting better at mixing thick and thin lines, and your characters feel much more natural and expressive. Keep pushing it!
Not only is it a crazy amount of polish and work for a 1 weeker, but you even found the time to visibly improve under such crazy pressure. Great work yo!
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