Dawww, hehe. Thanks so much guys~ I'm glad you liked Sasami's more proper introduction. Hopefully when I have the chance to battle again the Watenabe sisters can both share the screen time. hehe.
taylor- it sounded like you had trouble finishing this, but i cant see anything you could have cut out to make it shorter! the pacing for what you have is great- scene changes, exposition for the train system... i don't mind the art because of the completeness of the story. i like the shot from underneath the train when he gets dropped, and the crowd panel is great!
Jesus Christ, sasami straight up shot him!? That caught me completely off guard!
I liked your story taylor the idea of the void flying train system is a really clever angle love to see what other people can write up. Everything else was great the story was solid, quality top notch, and seeing more of tsumi's sisterwas a treat (and terrifing). Can't see what these two get thrown in next
THE SKETCH FIGHTER- You know there's a problem when as a reader, I saw this battle and expected this half to be a default. :/
OTAKUTAYLOR- Right off the bat- lovely train crowd scene on page 2! I'll admit I lingered on that page for a bit surprised by the volume of your scene despite your two week deadline. Impressive! I also think popping Baghead out of frame to dangle over panel two was a good call. Also, do I spy one of the man eating robots from your 24 hr comic on page 5? :D
I'm thrown with the way you draw Sasami's /clothing- namely scenes like page 8. I don't know if that's just meant to be shadow within her jacket on the bottom panel or her spine went super bendy. I keep finding myself saying ''that doesn't look right' for anatomy on page 9, but then I got to wondering: am I just so super accustomed to skintight clingy clothing in comics, that's breathable loose clothing falling on a body looks odd? I still haven't settled on an answer for that one.
I do like that this comic was a little peek into Sasami's neurosis. Girls got some serious anxiety problems.Definitely dreading the day Tsumi cacks and leaves her on her own.
It's definitely a bit rougher than my previous work, having taken such a long "break" from comics I got quite rusty. Plus I had a lot of work to do, which I didn't in my previous comics. And I was a moron who wrote 14 pages for a 2 week deadline. But that's reasons, not excuses. All that said, i'm really glad I got this out and I'm happy it was interesting for you shen! ^_^
Hopefully I'll be able to keep at it, and battle again soon...and learn to write my text before the last day... hehe.
SKETCH WHAT HAPPENED
Tay, oh my gosh poor Sasami has ISSUES!!I cant believe she just got Baghead like 4 times and blew him out an airlock! XD But I love the idea of Void to Caellum transport system, I'm going to utilize this later, thats fantastic. I feel like art this time is not quite as polished as it has been, like I can read it and it looks well enough but its a bit rough in some spots in a bit of an awkward way. still, fantastic comic! Good to see you battling more!
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