88, I didn't even know what happened last time, and it was still entertaining, good show. A fine cliffhanger, you even got me to go back and read the last one. Having done that, it is odd that Bhaav, (or is it Maansik?) is a different form in this one, at least for me. Art-wise, you've really got a handle on this style, looking good! Your paneling and pacing is great, although some epiphanies are a bit rushed. Really solid improvement, look forward to more Ethos comics.
BenT One, sweet drawings overall, I agree the line-work and fills should be the only black used, then do all the shading with the tones instead of hatching, bottom right panel is a good example, nice balance there. A lot to absorb in the story, could kind of follow, looked cool, keep it up you'll build your speed!
Penryn88:
I lost a lot of time to I was gonna finish of this story line in a BB but if you'd like to Jaz we can battle or colab on something let me know.
YES!!!!!! You two need to fight!!!!!
thanks for the feed back guys, I lost a lot of time to work on this comic because i started a new job 2 weeks ago, and with orientation, work training, and all that stuff i wasn't able to do everything i wanted for this. So thats why its only half toned. I was gonna finish of this story line in a BB but if you'd like to Jaz we can battle or colab on something let me know.
Pen: Really nice comic man. I'm reaching to come up with something off about this comic. I guess the only thing I thought was weird was how you went from no tones to using them halfway through the comic. Oh! and Tekka in a skirt, shame on you haha.
BenT: Nice line work. It's a shame you didn't get to add the dialogue in. I read the script, it's cool, but not the same as reading it in the comic itself. One thing I noticed is that I actually like your pencils/uninked pages more than the first page. I think it's because there's too much stuff going on and it muddles together. Maybe pull back on the use of tone or texture caused by cross hatching. Anyway, Good first battle. Hope to see more of your stuff in the future dude!
You both did a great job, Penryn88 I loved how you continued the story from the previous comic. Bent_one your art was great, sorry you weren't able to add the dialog; I'm looking forward to your BB.
Penryn88...Loved it...everything about this comic was enjoyable I really can't say a bad thing about it except maybe a few of the characters seemed a bit rigid. but overall, well done
Bent_one...I love the art, the action and the flow...they all work well together but your BIG issues are you need to make sure you make some time to get your dialogue in...even if its a quickly generated speech bubble and type that you throw in in post...not being able to read along with the story made it kind of confusing and a little hard to follow. Something else i would say is try and ink all of your panels before inking the borders (they're not nearly as important) I'll give you a fuller and more in depth critique when I see you tomorrow in person but I covered the gist of things here.
All things said I still loved both comics and great job to both of you and I can't wait to see some more, Penryn, reading Ethos stories are always enjoyable and Bent...I look forward to seeing some mind blowing shit from you in the future
Good work both of you, but I'm afraid Ethos' eeks out as winner to me for having the more comprehensible story.
GRANTED.
I'm so used to 'previously' pages that when I entered your comic, pen, I was completely lost on what was happening. Had to reread the previous adventure XD
PyrasTerran:
Wait.. Wasn't zedan supposed to battle some other folks a while back?
Yeah, I am working on a BB with Bhaav & Maansik, which explains why the duo suddenly ceased activity. I still have that in the works, but I'm bad at managing my time. It's going up as a re-con BB soon.
I got slapped with the Midterm stick, as well as slacking off on this.
EDIT: sorry Penryn88. I fucked up on this one. I'll still deliver the comic, but I have no time to ink it.
SUPER EDIT: Thanks dude! I'll use the time wisely!
The_BenT_One:
Penryn88, I should warn you that my intro comic is nowhere NEAR what I'm capable of...
Lol thats cool man, I've never really cared about stacking wins. I'm happy if i get an awesome battle and lots of feedback :)
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