@Mistress: In hindsight, I can kinda see what you mean. Would you be willing to point out any specific glaring errors for reference, or even some reference images of how I should be doing it? I might try and do more hatching in the next round, but I'd like to do it right.
@Dustin: Oh lordy, looking back at those last two pages, I totally squished everything in way too fast- that conversation should easily have had 2 or 3 pages more.
Thank you all for posting so much advice- this is exactly why I wanted to join Void. C:
like the character, but looks like you didnt have much time to work on it :/
good story but the paneling was a bit confusing small. i had to squint >_<
but all in all good character and good intro comic!
Your hatching gets careless in some areas. Perhaps that is what he meant. You need to apply more variation in line weight to make sure objects and figures aren't falling into the bg. Otherwise I found this overall enjoyable.
Leland by far is one of my favorite characters in this tournament. He's such a good guy!
Excellent line work and story. I took my time on this one. = )
When it comes to lettering in the traditional sense. I found that using the Ames Lettering Guide works well.
http://www.blambot.com/handlettering.shtml
My professor at SVA (School of Visual Arts) in Manhattan has a book all about making comics.
Drawing Words & Writing Pictures by Jessica Abel & Matt Madden.
It's rather handy but it mostly touches on making comics in the traditional sense of things. It's usually at barnes & nobles/borders. Check it out when you get the chance.
Thank you all so much for your feedback!
@Phillip C: Lettering seems to be the biggest issue for me. I will admit I rushed myself, but I'm also struggling to figure out how to pace dialogue. Also, do you have any suggestions for drawing with solid blacks? I've seen some great uses of it in Hellboy and Joe the Barbarian, but I have no clue how they accomplish it.
@Kuro: Hm, index cards, huh? I'll definitely try using that next time. I tried googling for an ames tool and I came across the Lee Ames drawing books- does that have anything to do with what you're referring to? The inks were with mostly 0.1 and 0.3 pens, Faber-Castell and Micron- I had to keep switching back and forth because the pens are well over a year old. It was my fault for wanting to hand-ink a comic without properly resupplying myself. Needless to say I will be making a trip to Ye Old Art Store before the next round begins. When you say stray lines, do you mean ones that aren't closed up?
@Fowlie: I drew the comic on 9" x 12" pages of paper that were marked off for 8.5" x 11"- a major reason why the scans were screwed up was because the pages still wouldn't fit in the bed, and some of them ended up getting tilted and cut off. Part of that's due to rushing myself- I was running around at 2 AM trying to make sure the pages were uploaded. I have larger versions of the pages, but I shrunk them down to 600 px wide to make sure they were small enough to be uploaded without a hitch. Would it have been better to use slightly bigger images?
I love lettering by hand, and I have learned a lot about it here on Void. My best advice is to take it slow ans write neat and clearly. Everyone's hand writing turns to chicken scratch when they are in a hurry. I also like to keep character dialog short and sweet in each panel. And Kuro's right, just spread your text out more.
Also, how big did you draw this?
If those were inks, you should look into using different thicknesses for different line widths. Or a brush. But generally tighten them up just a bit. A lot of stray lines.
I think my biggest problem was just how wordy it was. That much dialogue murders the pacing & flow, & skews your layouts because there's just so much of it. The rule I've always heard is the amount of dialogue on the page shouldn't exceed what you can fit on an index card. And with that, look into getting something like an ames tool. I mean I love the style of the lettering. It compliments the art well. But there was just so much & you were running out of room in spots. An ames tool keeps everything clear & even.
At the end of the day, If you want to have this much dialogue, spread it out over more pages so each one isn't as dense & slow to get through. Lot of promise though.
Not bad, Zest. You do need to be more careful with your lettering as it's kinda difficult for me to read it, also it's very very tiny. Needs more solid blacks, and your simple style could easily use it without any troubles. Just beware of how you draw attention with your inks. Story was OK, but again I couldn't really read it.
also... AAARGH! Another default? Please tell me you'll have something for us in a Beyond Battle?
@Fowlie: Thanks, dude. Only thing is, these were actually inks- just really thin and a bit rushed. I know that the scans cut off some of the bubbles, but do you have any suggestions for the lettering? I love lettering by hand, but it's not gonna do me any good if it's illegible.
@Orange: Thanks! C: Your style's awesomesauce too.<3
Hey, cool comic. Shame you didn't finish but the pencils were pretty clear and I like your style. Only problem is your dialog was messy and cramped and I could hardly read it, so I had to vote you down for that. Be more careful next time.
That was an error. Since I had to manually put up 25 comics last night and have to manually put in dates for when voting ends it was bound to happen. Fixed now.
It means that one or more of the opponents didn't submit in time, so they defaulted. If you vote, it'll help my ratings, but it won't affect my win/loss.
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